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Vanity: Pour yourself a drink and tell us a muslim (lower case on purpose) joke!

Posted on 01/09/2015 3:46:35 PM PST by goodwithagun

The religion of pieces is murdering innocents in gay Pair-ee, Boner is weepy because we lousy FReepers call him spineless, Hill and Billy have some 'splaining to do regarding a little black pedophile book, and obama recently made millions of sponges officially official.

Let's have some levity at Mad Mo's expense. I'll go first: Why do muslims call camels the ships of the desert?


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor
KEYWORDS:
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Because they're already full of semen! I'm about to open a bottle of extremely dry Zinfandel. Cheers folks!
1 posted on 01/09/2015 3:46:35 PM PST by goodwithagun
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To: goodwithagun

Obama!


2 posted on 01/09/2015 3:47:16 PM PST by uncitizen (2015 Here we come!)
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To: goodwithagun
Q: What do you call a herd of goats in a muslim country?

A: A harem.

3 posted on 01/09/2015 3:48:22 PM PST by AlaskaErik (I served and protected my country for 31 years. Progressives spent that time trying to destroy it.)
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To: goodwithagun

A muslim walks into a bar.

The bartender says, “Is this some kind of joke?”


4 posted on 01/09/2015 3:49:10 PM PST by savedbygrace (But God!)
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To: goodwithagun

What do you call a muslim with a camel and a goat ?

A bi-sexual.


5 posted on 01/09/2015 3:50:11 PM PST by Ouderkirk (To the left, everything must evidence that this or that strand of leftist theory is true)
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To: goodwithagun

Why no muslims in Star Trek episodes?

Star Trek is about the future.


6 posted on 01/09/2015 3:50:33 PM PST by umgud (I couldn't understand why the ball kept getting bigger......... then it hit me.)
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To: goodwithagun

Q: How do you tell a Sunni from a Shiite?
A: The Sunnis are the ones with the Shiite blown out of them.

Q: Do you know what the secret of an islamic marriage is?
A: The man get’s to see a striptease every night.

Q: How does every Islamic joke start?
A: By looking over your shoulder.

Q: What’s the difference between a Muslim and a vampire?
A: At some point the vampire will stop being bloodthirsty.

Q: What’s the difference between Mike Tyson and Osama Bin Laden?
A: Mike Tyson can take a shot to the head.

Q: How does a Muslim close the door?
A: Islams it.

Q: Did you hear about the Catholic Iraqi?
A: He was a Shite Muslim.

Q: Did you hear about the winner of the Middle Eastern beauty contest?
A: Me neither.

Q: How do you play Taliban bingo?
A: B-52...F-16...B-1...

Q: What do you call a drunken Muslim?
A: Mohammered.

Q: What do you call an evil Muslim?
A: Mu Ha Ha Ha Med.

Q: How did you get out of Iraq?
A: Iran


7 posted on 01/09/2015 3:51:03 PM PST by PROCON (Always give 100% -- unless you're donating Blood.)
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To: goodwithagun

Both are must read-

http://www.frontpagemag.com/2015/dgreenfield/laughing-at-mohammed/

http://pjmedia.com/zombie/2015/01/07/do-not-submit-republish-the-mohammed-cartoons-everywhere/


8 posted on 01/09/2015 3:51:45 PM PST by gasport (Immigration reform means arriving in air-conditioned comfort.)
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To: goodwithagun

How do you get mohmad’s wife pregnant ?

dress her up like a 10 year old boy.


9 posted on 01/09/2015 3:51:46 PM PST by Ouderkirk (To the left, everything must evidence that this or that strand of leftist theory is true)
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Comment #10 Removed by Moderator

To: goodwithagun

Why doesn’t God stop all the wars in the middle east ?

He doesn’t like muslims either


11 posted on 01/09/2015 3:53:46 PM PST by Ouderkirk (To the left, everything must evidence that this or that strand of leftist theory is true)
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To: goodwithagun

Did you hear about the time Mohammed’s wife called him a pedophile?

He replied, “that’s a big word for an 8 yr old!”


12 posted on 01/09/2015 3:55:16 PM PST by workerbee (The President of the United States is PUBLIC ENEMY #1)
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To: goodwithagun

This thread is a idea, but I have to pinch a Mohammad in the toilet right now. I hope it’s not unflushable.


13 posted on 01/09/2015 3:55:16 PM PST by King Moonracer (Bad lighting and cheap fabric, that's how you sell clothing.....)
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To: umgud

gosh darn! I was going to tell that one. It’s the only muslim joke I know.

Basically I don’t find them amusing anymore.


14 posted on 01/09/2015 3:55:54 PM PST by jocon307
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To: humblegunner

My six year old son was curious why I was laughing and looked over my shoulder. His exact words: “Mommy that goat is giving that guy’s butt a hug!”


15 posted on 01/09/2015 3:57:15 PM PST by goodwithagun (My gun has killed fewer people than Ted Kennedy's car.)
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Comment #16 Removed by Moderator

To: humblegunner
LOL!

5.56mm

17 posted on 01/09/2015 3:57:48 PM PST by M Kehoe
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To: goodwithagun

Why can’t you circumcise a muslim? Because there’s no end to those pricks.


18 posted on 01/09/2015 3:59:41 PM PST by dainbramaged (Get out of my country now)
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To: goodwithagun

A muslim walks into a bar with his wife.

The bartender says “The filthy unshaven beast has to go but the goat can stay.”


19 posted on 01/09/2015 3:59:42 PM PST by cripplecreek (You can't half ass conservatism.)
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To: goodwithagun
“Mommy that goat is giving that guy’s butt a hug!”

Yes, because he's a friendly goat.

Ten years from now, you can tell him "payback's a bitch!" ;-)

20 posted on 01/09/2015 4:00:29 PM PST by humblegunner
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