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Posted on 04/18/2011 10:24:24 AM PDT by John Semmens
Revelation that highway fatalities decrease by 2.3% for every 10 cent per gallon increase in the price of fuel has US Secretary of Transportation Ray LaHood fired up.
“For all the carping I have to listen to over high gas prices I’m happy to be able to point to a silver lining,” boasted a bubbly LaHood. “Driving their own cars is the most dangerous thing most people do. The more we can discourage this, the more lives we can save. Based on this latest study it looks like if we can get the price of gasoline up to around $9 a gallon we could virtually eliminate traffic fatalities.”
“I’m thinking that at $9 a gallon there’d be a lot less driving,” the Secretary ventured. “Cars and trucks would be so scarce on the roads that their chances of colliding with each other would be nil. There’d also be fewer motor vehicles for trains to hit on the grade crossings. Air pollution would be way down. That’d save lives too.”
LaHood professed himself “a strong supporter of the President’s ban on offshore drilling, carbon taxes, and the ‘cap-and-trade’ emissions bill—anything that will help get prices up to where they need to be to change people’s decisions. A person driving himself wherever he wants whenever he want is both inefficient and unsafe. The sooner we can do away with such anti-social behavior the better off this country will be.”
read more...
http://azconserv1.wordpress.com/2011/04/16/obama-says-failure-to-raise-debt-ceiling-will-wreck-global-economy/
Yeah, and there were no automobile accidents in the stone age, either. What a f@#king dumba$$ reporter.
I bet Obama gets half his ideas from this one satire site, not even REALIZING it’s satire!
Uhhhhhhh. it's satire.
“Semi”-satire is right.
Yep, and you'd also be increasing unemployment and poverty, which in turn increases desperation, crime, drug abuse, murders and suicides. What a wonderful mind you have, Mr. Lahood. Hell, why not just increase the cost of automobiles themselves, to the point where only a few people can afford them. Then there'd be no automobile deaths. Don't you just love how liberals think?
OK, it’s satire, but it’s still a perfect example of liberal think.
> “Driving their own cars is the most dangerous thing most people do.”
Yes, of course, another totalitarian statist limiting my options for “my own good”.
After all, who knows what’s best for me more than some faceless, brainless, bureaucratic twit in an overpaid ivory tower position somewhere in the DC swamp?
“If it saves just one life, then it is worth it!” /s
At the rate that gas has risen, we’ll all be immortal very soon!
You darn near snagged me this time....
So, if you eliminate cars, no one will die by one.
Instead, we’ll get thrown from our horses, run over by stampeding cattle.
It’s like saying if you get rid of the all guns, no one will be killed.
/.bovine fecal movement.\
“OK, it’s satire, but it’s still a perfect example of liberal think.”
True. John Semmens knows the bastards probably better than anyone, thus why it’s a “perfect example”.
Another good one John.
"It's for the Children" /s
but you beat me to it. I guess all I am left with is
"Gas prices hit new highs! Women and minorities hit hardest!" /s
The great problem with this as satire is that it is exactly what the obamanuts really believe and are aiming for.
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