Don't judge all on disability by her. I'm on disability and have been since 1994 back when it was nearly impossible to get on it. My wife has been on it since 1985. My wife is a quadriplegic. Her disability doesn't need to be explained the word quadriplegic says it all.
I went on it nine years afterward due to some serious but non life threatening issues in my Central Nervous System involving sensory processing. A life long issue that finally became disabling when it reached seizure level. I walk with a cane now for balance issues and nobody questions my disability because I use the cane. Two years ago I didn't need it. Falls though made it a reality.
Our total combined income on disability is right at $1500mo. No extra help like SSI. No Food Stamps either. Some of our meds are paid for by Part D many more like one for Asthma for her is $100mo just for the co-pay for one medication. We have a 98 Dodge High Top conversion Van. A necessity because of a 300 plus pound wheel chair {empty} and a 300 pound hydraulic lift the van must carry.
She gets no home health care assistance. I am the caregiver {unlicensed nurse} just as I was when I was working and leaving her home by herself. That was sometimes 16 hours straight if my relief worker failed to show. If an emergency came up for her a faimily member could respond within a couple minutes though.
Not everyone on disability is in a wheelchair. Nor all all or for that matter most gaming the system. My sister five years older is on disability after she became widowed a few years ago. She's had several major strokes and now Dementia onset. She qualified for disability because she was over 54 and disabled and widowed. It's a small age window 54-62 put in the rules to cover stay at home mothers who had not ever worked but were disabled and suddenly widowed.
Income wasn't an issue when her husband was alive so they never applied for help. When B.I.L. was out of work due to lay offs a couple of times he couldn't get help for her though.
I am most certainly *not* judging everyone on disability by her. Just seems to me, that if my income was $3500 month total, even living by myself, I’d drive an old beater, rather than leasing a car.
I hope things turn out well for you and your wife, I was just surprised that someone with limited income spends such a large fraction of it on a car.