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23 Things More Secure Than The Southern Border
Babylon Bee ^ | 09/12/2022 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 09/12/2022 5:35:28 PM PDT by DFG

According to Kamala Harris, America's southern border is totally secure! Whew--that's great news! But upon further investigation, we found 23 things that are currently more secure than the southern border.

1. Your grandma's computer password 2. Trump's safe in Mar-A-Lago 3. Epstein's prison cell 4. Thermal exhaust ports on the death star 5. An unlocked car in Chicago 6. Your daughter's hair around Joe Biden 7. Bed, Bath & Beyond Stock 8. Trusting in works for salvation 9. Rings of Power Season 2 10. The mattress on the car roof that the driver is holding with his left hand 11. Ashley Biden's diary 12. The word of a Spaniard 13. Hunter's laptop 14. Elections in Philadelphia 15. Ben and J-Lo's marriage 16. German gas prices 17. California's electric grid 18. Your lunch in the break room fridge 19. A cheeseburger in front of your mom 20. A pile of crack in front of Hunter Biden 21. Big tech's handling of your data 22. Your 401k 23. Pretty much every other border everywhere else in the world


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; border; illegals; kamala; migrantsurge; secure; southernborder; vp

1 posted on 09/12/2022 5:35:28 PM PDT by DFG
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To: DFG

The Bee so brightens my day


2 posted on 09/12/2022 5:38:16 PM PDT by Nifster (I see puppy dogs in the clouds )
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To: DFG

1. Your grandma’s computer password

2. Trump’s safe in Mar-A-Lago

3. Epstein’s prison cell

4. Thermal exhaust ports on the death star

5. An unlocked car in Chicago

6. Your daughter’s hair around Joe Biden

7. Bed, Bath & Beyond Stock

8. Trusting in works for salvation

9. Rings of Power Season 2

10. The mattress on the car roof that the driver is holding with his left hand

11. Ashley Biden’s diary

12. The word of a Spaniard

13. Hunter’s laptop

14. Elections in Philadelphia

15. Ben and J-Lo’s marriage

16. German gas prices

17. California’s electric grid

18. Your lunch in the break room fridge

19. A cheeseburger in front of your mom

20. A pile of crack in front of Hunter Biden

21. Big tech’s handling of your data

22. Your 401k

23. Pretty much every other border everywhere else in the world


3 posted on 09/12/2022 5:46:43 PM PDT by BenLurkin (The above is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion, or satire, or both.)
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To: DFG
When will the FBI be sending a SWAT team to the Bee's headquarters? When will the IRS be sending a bunch of their newly hired,armed,agents to their Headquarters? When will the Southern Poverty Law Center label the Bee a racist terrorist organization?
4 posted on 09/12/2022 5:50:44 PM PDT by Gay State Conservative (Covid Is All About Mail In Ballots)
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To: DFG

Karen Bass’ handguns.


5 posted on 09/12/2022 5:51:31 PM PDT by gundog ( It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. )
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To: BenLurkin
My grandma's password is “123456”. Mine is “qwerty”.
6 posted on 09/12/2022 5:52:38 PM PDT by Gay State Conservative (Covid Is All About Mail In Ballots)
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To: gundog

A Georgia vote counting room.


7 posted on 09/12/2022 5:53:45 PM PDT by Gay State Conservative (Covid Is All About Mail In Ballots)
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To: Gay State Conservative

drowssap


8 posted on 09/12/2022 6:00:31 PM PDT by BenLurkin (The above is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion, or satire, or both.)
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To: Gay State Conservative
My grandma's password is “123456”. Mine is “qwerty”.

Grandma's PW is more secure than you think. A hacker has to guess 6 numbers AND get them in the right order. Your average liberal can't do that.

9 posted on 09/12/2022 6:03:33 PM PDT by Auntie Dem (Hey! Hey! Ho! Ho! Terrorist lovers gotta go!)
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To: DFG

The Babylon Bee sure gets it.


10 posted on 09/12/2022 6:07:39 PM PDT by metmom (...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith…)
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To: DFG
  1. a rack of ribs in front of Stacey Abrams
  2. lobster and Wagu beef around Michelle the wookie
  3. your life savings around any Democrat
Lots of possibilities
11 posted on 09/12/2022 6:30:03 PM PDT by from occupied ga (Your government is your most dangerous enemy - EVs a solution for which there is no problem)
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To: DFG

Jeffrey Toobin’s hand grip!
Kampala Harris’ hand grip on a politician’s pole.
Nancy Pelosi’ tube of Polygrip?
Don Lemon’s lips!!!


12 posted on 09/12/2022 7:40:55 PM PDT by MadMax, the Grinning Reaper (Figures )
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To: DFG
A donut in Brian Stelter's vicinity.

Hillary Clinton's email server.

Bill Clinton's marital vows.

13 posted on 09/12/2022 9:09:56 PM PDT by KarlInOhio (The government sees you as either livestock or pet. If things get bad they will eat their pets too.)
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