Man Accused of Having Relations With Cattle

NEILLSVILLE, Wis. - A 63-year-old man is charged with sexual gratification with an animal for allegedly having sex with calves.

Harold G. Hart, of Neillsville, allegedly told police that he routinely stopped at a Greenwood farm, usually after bar closing or on trips to strip clubs near Marshfield or Neillsville.

A criminal complaint filed in Clark County Circuit Court said the farm's owners installed a motion detector on Jan. 22 after regularly seeing footprints and vehicle tracks on their land. Around 4 a.m. the next morning, a sensor sounded and Hart was caught leaving the barn, but Hart allegedly said he just used a bathroom in the barn and had never been there before.

Hart told police he had sex with heifers before he went into the service in 1963 and resumed about a year ago at the farm. He admitted to using a rope to tie calves around the neck and estimated he had been to the farm "at least 50 times," according to the complaint.

He told police he never had sex with animals while maintaining a relationship with his a girlfriend or his wife, the complaint said.

Hart also is charged with disorderly conduct and two counts of obstructing an officer. Each charge carries up to nine months in jail.

clogs

Clippity clop, clippity clop

That is too frickin funny.

Think she chewed tobacco? At night, in bed? Yea, that's sexy.

Maybe lay down when the rain is a'comin?

I hope she didn't die of mad wife disease. That would be tragic.

Man, I could go on and on with this. I suppose I'll quit.

A traveler was touring Scotland. He stopped in a pub for a drink in a seaside hamlet. Sitting at the bar was local fellow, rather worn looking bloke, a true Scotsman. The two men get to talking and after a few pints the Scotsman says to the traveler:

"Listen here man... you see this bar here?" he slaps his palm on the bar, "I built this bar with me own two hands. I planed it and sanded it myself, stained it with my own sweat and blood. See how even and just it is? Have you ever seen a nicer bar? But do the people here call me McGregor the bar builder? Noooo....

"Now look outside. See that stone wall there? See how flat the top is and how straight it runs? I built that wall with my own two hands. I carried and set every stone meself. But do they call me McGregor the mason? Nooo!

"And out there in the water... you see that pier? I built that pier too, with my own hands. In all the winter storms, year in and year out, that pier never budges! I made that pier with my own sweat and blood. But do they call me McGregor the pier builder? Nooo."

Then the Scotsman takes a sip of beer and says in a low voice "but you @#^# one sheep . . ."

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