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Katherine Harris Has Cooties
September 3, 2006
| Nick Denger
Posted on 09/03/2006 11:16:25 AM PDT by Nick Danger
She can't win. No one likes her. Her car is ugly and her horse can't talk. And now, the most damning evidence of all is being whispered and murmured from sea to shining sea: Katherine Harris has cooties.
News-99 has obtained exclusive footage of a private meeting between Ms. Harris and her doctors in which the 49-year-old Harris is told the horrifying results of a recent series of blood tests. "You have cooties," the video shows the doctors saying.
TOPICS:
KEYWORDS: cooties; flelection2006; hootiesonahorse; modsonvacation; neverdonatetofragain; wasteofbandwidth
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To: Nick Danger
She can't win. She can't win. She can't win. She can't win. She can't win. She can't win. She can't win. She can't win. She can't win. She can't win. She can't win. She can't win. She can't win. She can't win. She can't win. She can't win. So neener neener neener.
2 posted on
09/03/2006 2:09:13 PM EDT by
SouthDakotaGOP
To: Nick Danger
It is widely known that she can't win.
3 posted on
09/03/2006 2:11:16 PM EDT by
OregonGOP
To: OregonGOP
It is a widely known fact that she can't win.
4 posted on 09/03/2006 2:12:38 PM EDT by MexicanGOP
]
To: OregonGOP
After saying "she can't win," mention something about her personal appearance.
5 posted on 09/03/2006 2:14:07 PM EDT by Astroturfer
]
To: Nick Danger
How did you get it to look like multiple replies? That's kind of neat.
2
posted on
09/03/2006 11:18:41 AM PDT
by
mysterio
To: mysterio
"Katherine Harris Has Cooties ..."
What the heck are "Cooties" anyway?
3
posted on
09/03/2006 11:27:32 AM PDT
by
Mr. C
To: Nick Danger
I know how, but I won't tell.
Shouldn't it also be posted as a "braking Gnu" story.
(Here's the video.)
4
posted on
09/03/2006 11:30:50 AM PDT
by
ASA Vet
(3.03)
To: mysterio
To: Nick Danger
She's got great cans. She's got great cans. She's got great cans. She's got great cans. She's got great cans. She's got great cans. She's got great cans. She's got great cans. So neener neener neener.
999 posted on
09/03/2006 2:09:13 PM EDT by
SouthDakotaGOP
5
posted on
09/03/2006 11:31:09 AM PDT
by
reagan_fanatic
(What Darwin denied he now regrets)
To: Mr. C
I have it on good authority that 'Cooties' are the waste product of Gummy Bears.
6
posted on
09/03/2006 11:31:32 AM PDT
by
Pukin Dog
(Sans Reproache)
To: mysterio
7
posted on
09/03/2006 11:32:13 AM PDT
by
Dog Gone
To: mysterio
She bought those cans. For all we know, they are filled with Campbell's Tomato Soup.
8
posted on
09/03/2006 11:32:32 AM PDT
by
Pukin Dog
(Sans Reproache)
To: Mr. C
9
posted on
09/03/2006 11:32:59 AM PDT
by
mysterio
![](http://www.grrl.com/cootie2.jpg")
Had this game as a kid.
IBTZ?
10
posted on
09/03/2006 11:34:20 AM PDT
by
prairiebreeze
(Brought to you by the American Democrat Party, aka alQaeda, Western Division.)
To: Nick Danger
I had Cooties once. Then my mom sold them at a garage sale.
11
posted on
09/03/2006 11:35:20 AM PDT
by
ShadowDancer
(No autopsy, no foul.)
To: Nick Danger
The old broad looks real pretty on a horse though.
To: Nick Danger
She can't win. No one likes her. Her car is ugly and her horse can't talk. Yeah, well.. she's aerodynamic.
13
posted on
09/03/2006 11:38:22 AM PDT
by
humblegunner
(If you're gonna die, die with your boots on.)
To: Nick Danger
Dang, Danger you did all that by hand? You need help.
14
posted on
09/03/2006 11:40:10 AM PDT
by
raybbr
(You think it's bad now - wait till the anchor babies start to vote.)
To: Mr. C
From the old "Happy Days" program: Arnold, who is about to take his wedding vows is asked, "Do you have the jitters?" His response: "No, I had a blood test."
15
posted on
09/03/2006 11:43:28 AM PDT
by
Socratic
("I'll have the roast duck with the mango salsa.")
To: mysterio
HEY!! we have RULES here- Katherine Harris is a major babe - despite how those idiot liberals portray her on TV and saturday night live
heres two of my all time favorite wimmins
16
posted on
09/03/2006 11:46:15 AM PDT
by
Mr. K
(Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants don't help...)
To: Mr. K
HEY!! we have RULES here- Katherine Harris is a major babe.
..major babe
To: Nick Danger
She should have purchased anti-cootie protection, from Kevin Miller, like I did in the third grade. Only one days lunch money and look at me now, I'm completely fine.
18
posted on
09/03/2006 12:03:16 PM PDT
by
Gumption
To: Donald Rumsfeld Fan
I'd "stack" Harris, Diana Irey and Sarah Palin (Alaska gubernatorial candidate) up against any three Democratic candidates.
19
posted on
09/03/2006 12:07:47 PM PDT
by
BW2221
To: Mr. C
I don't know what cooties are either, but I'd like to get close enough to her to catch some...
20
posted on
09/03/2006 12:10:09 PM PDT
by
Doctor Raoul
(New York Times? Get a rope!)
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