Posted on 09/05/2006 6:38:30 AM PDT by xzins
NEW YORK -- A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule, and a calculator.
At a morning press conference, Attorney General Alberto Gonzales said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying "weapons of math instruction."
"Al-gebra is a problem for us," Gonzales said. "They desire solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values. They use secret code names, like 'x' and 'y,' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns,' but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the "axis of medieval" with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'There are 3 sides to every triangle.' "
When asked to comment on the arrest, 'cut 'n' run democrat spokesman Sen. John Kerry said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes."
I have my father's slide rule. The slider is corroded in place though. I want clean it up and learn how to use it.
He can count to 11 with his shoes on...
ping
We all need a laugh here and there!!
Ping to the "Another Reason to Homeschool" list
This ping list is for the "other" articles of interest to homeschoolers about education and public school. If you want on/off this list, please freepmail me. The main Homeschool Ping List by DaveLoneRanger handles the homeschool-specific articles.
You just dated me...
Most of the 20th Century advances were made using the Slide Rule.
After the Abacus, it is the most fundamental mathematical instrument known before the calculator.
Without it, there would be no calculator or Lunar Landing...
Think about that!
I have one from my father, dating to the 1940s in pristine condition (last time I checked).
I keep one in my office, and use it occasionally too. I get some funny looks from some of the other engineers, but sometimes it is faster than a calculator and gives me all of the precision I need.
Flight screeners became suspicious when he sined and cosined out loud. They also found a suspicious looking Pi in his carry on baggage.
priceless
I still have mine, and would ahve to pull it out, blow off 30 yrs of dust off it, and then try to remember how to use it without remembering all the log tables.
I think I have one, too. I've had it for years, but I don't know when I got it, and I have no idea how to use it. My husband is a systems analyst, and I think even he saw it and asked, "What is this thing?" :-)
If you want to get rid of it I'll take it. FReepmail me, I'm serious.
Are slide rulers difficult to find? Right after I posted, I took mine out of the drawer and compared it to a picture on Wikipedia. I don't think what I have is a slide ruler after all.
Mine is a "metric converter". There are photos of metric converters at the bottom of this site:
http://www.eyrie.org/~dvandom/slide/slidegallery.html
Whatever it is, I can't give it away. I think it might've belonged to my father. I've been holding onto it figuring my sons can use it with their math lessons eventually... maybe they'll figure out how to use it. ;-)
They are quite hard to find. I've seen some on eBay, but like most everything else there they are overpriced. There are a few companies that still make them on a specialty basis, but they have for the most part,been replaced by the calculator. I'd keep it, specially if it has any sentimental value to it. It would be quite a curiosity for your sons I am sure.
It's quite a curiosity for me, too. :-)
Maybe I'm getting old, but I remember when calculators were a new thing and very expensive. Now I can pick one up at the dollar store. Who would've thought that one day calculators would be so cheap, and rulers would be hard to find.
I'm always shopping the educational stores and catalogs. If I come across a real slide ruler that's inexpensive, I'll let you know where to find it.
Hey, thanks!
hee.. had to send that to my husband...
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.