N.C. man charged with 'coughing' assault

YahooNews ^ | Sep 27 2007 | staff reporter

[Daffynition]

Morrisville police have charged a man with assault on a government official after an officer said the man coughed into his face during a traffic stop.

Officer Chris Gill said in his report that Kent Kauffman looked into his eyes before "hacking" in his face three times, according to Morrisville spokeswoman Stacie Galloway. Kauffman said he did cough from the window of his minivan but did so toward Gill's waist.

"He says I coughed in his face," Kauffman said. "But that would only work if he had a 4-foot-long face."

Kauffman said he developed a cough after his dog died last week. He said Gill put him in handcuffs and threw him into the side of the patrol car.

Gill pulled Kauffman over Tuesday for not wearing a seat belt. He now faces a misdemeanor charge and, if convicted, could spend up to 60 days in jail.

[Daffynition]

Why the long face Mr. Kauffman?

[Samurai_Jack]

I guess Kauffman will be KAUFFING UP a large fine?

[Daffynition]

LEOs need new protective equipment ...

[Daffynition]

**cough** **cough**

[festus]

I told you this seat belt law would lead to no good.

[Daffynition]

LOL ... there ya go! :-D

[SunkenCiv]

Kauffman said he developed a cough after his dog died last week.

That's ruff. Fido know what to think about this charge. I just wonder who made the collar.

[Daffynition]

[The Spirit Of Allegiance]

Kauffman said he developed a cough after his dog died last week.

> > > That's ruff. Fido know what to think about this charge. I just wonder who made the collar.

Since this germicidal maniac was collared during a traffic stop, I think we should insist on plundering the coffer of the cougher to buy donuts for the coughee.






Pun for All and All for Pun....
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ping list PING! (see keyword FReePun)
If you want either on or off
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(on or off requests, just FReepmail).

[Enterprise]

LOL - These articles about germs make amoeba nervous.

[nuconvert]

Lol

[The Spirit Of Allegiance]

Sometimes it may not be a good idea to make a sudden move—even to cover one’s mouth.

But it seems like the driver could have turned his head....

[The Spirit Of Allegiance]

You’ve been added to my ping list. Put that in your hanky and cough it.

[punster]

I’m all choked up. If Kaufman had sneezed on the officer, I would have said, “It’ snot funny.” That is an example of how you can booger the English language.

Another explanation: Perhaps, Mr. Kaufmann was on his was to coughie break.

Finally, Kaufman may have been a phlegm phlam man.

[mikrofon]

"He says I coughed in his face," Kauffman said. "But that would only work if he had a 4-foot-long face."

John Kerry had the same thing happen at a rally once...

[Daffynition]

I'm not sure about the honor ... coz I'm much better at visual puns ... but if SunkenCiv is on your list, then I'll try ... SunkenCiv entered a pun contest ten different times in the hope that at least one of his puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did. He has puns of steel. ;-(

Stay in touch.

[Daffynition]

HAHAHA! Your PUNchlines are great! They hardly seem recycled!

[Salamander]

Seems like he could hack the pressure of a routine traffic stop easily enough.

[SunkenCiv]

Looks like the cougher left bismarck on the coughee. Or at least, those are said to be the facts of the case, and I’m not prepared to disputum.

[dixiechick2000]

"Morrisville police have charged a man with assault on a government official after an officer said the man coughed into his face during a traffic stop. "

That's snot funny.

I know...weak...but punny. ;o)