Skip to comments.Why Cats Are Not Employed As Doctors
Posted on 05/21/2010 11:11:00 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows
Why Cats Are Not Employed As Doctors
Valuable minutes lost in surgery as doctor furiously paws at nearby fly.
While informing patient's family of their loss, doctor suddenly loses interest and walks off.
In bid to become chief surgeon, doctor scent-marks entire hospital.
Doctor refuses to respond to own name during code blue.
Staff grows increasingly alarmed as doctor runs up and down hallway for no apparent reason.
Sensing colleagues' growing dissatisfaction with his work, doctor curls up against a radiator and goes to sleep.
Doctor raises hackles and bares teeth whenever new interns are introduced.
Doctor loses medical license after licking self, instruments clean.
So what have we learned? That cats are best employed in service industries? Certainly. But more importantly, always listen for meows when entering a hospital. The life you save may very well be your own.
(Excerpt) Read more at allbleedingstops.blogspot.com ...
That is funny, I like that
Because they make my eyes swell shut?
Dr Cat sleeps 23 hours a day and the other hour goes crazy dashing under the furniture.
2 female Dr cats can’t be in the same room with each other to do surgery.
Only 23 hours?? Anything under 26-27 hours is grounds for an instant insomnia diagnosis.
Dr. Cat lies outside restroom door, waiting for occupant to emerge.
Depending on the field, that could be an advantage.
My reaction exactly.
Go ahead. Make my day. You do know that cats can fly ... right? And that's Doctor Cat to you ...
just toooooohh cute! ;-)
or unless said puddy is at the reloading press crankin’ out some ‘roll yer owns’!!!!!
Mine are constantly giving me “catscans” when I’m not feeling well. ;-)
same here! flat out priceless!
I’ve had as many as twelve in a 2-bedroom apartment. Okay, okay, Mama cat had 9 kittens but I found good homes for all of them. That was thirty-three years ago.
Today we have only nine cats and two dogs.
Everybody knows that cats are MUCH better in professions such as aviary management, fitness training (excepting aqua aerobics), and human behavioral analysis and therapy.
We up until 2 years ago had 8 dogs (built a 200 foot by 150 foot dog pen and one heck of a big dog house). Mother stray showed up with 7 puppies.
The last puppy passed away 2 years ago at 14 years old.
That was really tough on my wife and me. Just doesn't seem right to get another dog still.
You have my utmost sympathy.
Many years ago we had a dog, an American Cocker Spaniel, who was a prince among dogs. Can’t help myself here, as Rufus was truly an exceptional companion, a great dog, and I will mourn his passing forever. That was eleven years ago.
Six years later I decided that I wanted another spaniel, one that would grow old with me. My family tends to be long-lived, so I didn’t worry about outliving a puppy coming to live with me in my early 50s.
After extensive research I decided on a field-bred English Springer Spaniel as the ideal dog. They don’t have the health problems of an American Cocker or bench-bred English Springer, and are far more common than one would suspect.
By chance, a year or so later, I came across a handbill advertising exactly this kind of puppy for $75. As 7-week old puppy she came to live with us and has been an absolute joy. Now 5-years old, she is my constant companion and I’ve never regretted my decision. Even the cats love her!
I heartily recommend you reconsider. Most likely you will not regret a choice if made wisely. There are also many organizations that deal with finding suitable homes for abandonned pure-bred dogs - I recommend them as “angels” dedicated to saving animals. They can be found on the internet.
You can’t has cheezburger. You has a hotdog.
ha, ha - may I add one? Dr coughs up hair ball during open heart surgery and compromises the clean room...
The only anesthetic Dr. Cat will permit during surgery is...catnip!
Doctor winds around legs begging for attention, tripping injured patients.
Doctor jumps up on sterile instrument tray looking for treats.
*** Doctor refuses to respond to own name during code blue.***
Is time to sit and stare at corner where all cosmic answers are imbedded.
Sounds like a cat. Or a psych resident.
Sssssh! It’s not nice to give away kitteh secrets!
“Is time to sit and stare at corner where all cosmic answers are imbedded.”
AHA! So that is what my kitty has been doing!
Awww! Sooo beautiful!!
I love these pics!
Yeah, like the Social Security office or the DMV.
Some days you teh kitteh, some days you teh cheezburger.
The Naming of Cats
The Naming of Cats is a difficult matter,
It isn’t just one of your holiday games;
You may think at first I’m as mad as a hatter
When I tell you, a cat must have THREE DIFFERENT NAMES.
First of all, there’s the name that the family use daily,
Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo or James,
Such as Victor or Jonathan, George or Bill Bailey—
All of them sensible everyday names.
There are fancier names if you think they sound sweeter,
Some for the gentlemen, some for the dames:
Such as Plato, Admetus, Electra, Demeter—
But all of them sensible everyday names.
But I tell you, a cat needs a name that’s particular,
A name that’s peculiar, and more dignified,
Else how can he keep up his tail perpendicular,
Or spread out his whiskers, or cherish his pride?
Of names of this kind, I can give you a quorum,
Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo, or Coricopat,
Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellylorum-
Names that never belong to more than one cat.
But above and beyond there’s still one name left over,
And that is the name that you never will guess;
The name that no human research can discover—
But THE CAT HIMSELF KNOWS, and will never confess.
When you notice a cat in profound meditation,
The reason, I tell you, is always the same:
His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation
Of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name:
His ineffable effable
Deep and inscrutable singular Name.
—T. S. Eliot
I didn't think so!
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