Some Assembly Required
Come to think of it, I had mine torn down almost that far.....
Posted on 07/22/2011 5:45:18 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
Subject: FW: Paddy the fire fighter
Paddy was walking along the street during his once-in-a-lifetime visit to New York when he rounds a corner and there’s a high rise building on fire.
Paddy, ever the kind-hearted and resourceful Irishman, runs up to the building to see if he can help and notices people trapped five stories up.
Paddy yells to the people, “I’m Paddy Michael Fitzpatrick, an Irish Fire Fighter on holiday. I’m also a Rugby Union fullback! If you jump, I’ll catch you!”
One lady, in desperation, jumps and sure enough Paddy catches her.
Then a man sees that Paddy catches the woman and jumps. Sure enough, Paddy catches him as well.
Then Obama jumps out and crashes to the sidewalk. Paddy didn’t even attempt to catch him. Paddy looks up and yells, “Don’t be throwin’down the burnt ones...!!!!”
Warning!! If you laugh at this, Jesse Jackson, Al Sharpton and Rev. Wright will be coming to kick yo ass!
Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their Travel schedules. So, the husband left Glasgow and flew to Barcelona on Thursday, with his wife flying down the following day.
The husband checked into the hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an email to his wife. However, he accidentally left out one letter in her email address, and without realizing his error, sent the email.
Meanwhile, somewhere in Blackpool , a widow had just returned home from her husband's funeral. He was a minister who died following a heart attack.
The widow decided to check her email expecting messages from relatives and friends. After reading the first message, she screamed and fainted.
The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read:
To: My Loving Wife
Subject: I've Arrived
Date: October 16, 2008
I know you're surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now and you are allowed to send emails to your loved ones.
I've just arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow.
Looking forward to seeing you then! Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.
P.S. F***ing hot down here!
Thanks Lucky...I really need this today. Your work is greatly appreciated.
ARRRGH! The brown acid flashbacks are happening again! Make them stop!
Top 25! (not counting your post(s)!
Gud gawd! She looks like a 60’s nightmare!
“Never buy a man anything that says “some assembly required” on the box. It will ruin his Special Day and he will always have parts left over. No one knows why.”
I love some assembly required. Problem is 2 years later, when I am looking for something in the garage, I find a bag with a bunch of things labeled “spare parts.”
Glenn Beck said that the masks were coming off for the “Progressives”, I guess he was right!LOL
Laz's steam-powered Imperial Walker
And I thought the masks were pretty scary, but....!
Daughter wants to go tubing behind the boat. So I get the big tube out of storage and inflate it. It has a leak. Now where is that little patch kit that came with it when I bought it last summer?
Probably mixed in with the extra VW parts........
I always enjoy your excellent creative artwork, but don’t go all Andy Warhol on us! LOL!
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That is just WRONG!
Now my screen is all wavy!
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