Posted on 12/01/2011 10:46:35 PM PST by Free ThinkerNY
LOL
oops should be wear
“Jingle Bells
Twilight smells,
Edward ran away....
Bells dies,
Jacob cries,
IT’S STAR WARS ALL THE WAAAAY.....”
The Occupyers were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of anarchy danced in their heads.
And mamma in her Birkenstocks and I with my cap,
Had just settled down for a long winter’s rap.
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang forth to see what was the matter.
Forgetting Chris Mathews and leaving my bong,
I went to the window expecting to see Cheech and Chong
The moon shone on the breast of the new-fallen snow,
That despite global warming was piled up below.
When, what to my hopeful eyes should appear,
But Barack himself, complete with his sneer.
He were not alone, oh no he was not,
Beside him was the rest of that despicable lot.
More red than Lenin, the Libs they came,
And he peered down his nose as he called them by name!
Now Barney, now Steny, now Patrick, and Bernie
On Biden, on Reid on Schumer and Pelosi
To the top of the windmills, to the top of the Mall!
Now give-away, spend away, give away all!
Though the T-Party objected and mightily they tried,
Not too worry its free stuff, as usual they lied
So up to the house-top the Porkers they flew,
With the sleigh full of handouts and Dear Leader too.
And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
The laughing and hooting they were all so aloof
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney Obama came with a bound.
He was dressed all in red, from his head to his sneaks
Had his Teleprompter as well, in case he had to speak
A bundle of goodies he produced in a flash,
He was not a peddler, it was his personal stash.
Free Housing, a new Prius, which one will it be?
Here’s a signed copy by Saul Alisnky?
He said with a nod everyone worries less
Ever since I pushed thru another Stimulus
Nothing of leather, nothing of fur,
Nothing for PC hims or socially conscious hers.
Nothing that might be construed to pollute.
Nothing to aim, nothing to shoot.
Nothing that clamored or made lots of noise.
Nothing for just girls, or just for the boys.
Nothing that claimed to be gender specific.
Nothing that's warlike or non-pacific.
No candy or sweets...they were bad for the tooth.
Nothing that seemed to embellish a truth.
And fairy tales, while not yet forbidden,
Were like Ken and Barbie, better off hidden.
For they raised the hackles of those psychological
Who claimed the only good gift was one ecological.
No baseball, no football...someone could get hurt,
Besides, playing sports exposed kids to dirt.
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And filled all the stockings, then turned with a jerk.
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose!
He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
We’ll skip all the Cons and make them bristle,
But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,
Happy Kwanza to all, and to all a good-night!"
So I leave you to think
On this one final note-
IF YOU’VE HAD IT WITH SOCIALISM
NEXT NOV, LET'S CLEAN HOUSE, GET OUT AND VOTE
Love it!
Love it!
hare rama, hare rama, rama rama, hare hare
Twas the Night Befo’ Chrimmas, Bitches
Twas the night befo’ Chrimmas, we was chillin’ at my crib
We was getting our snack on with our 40’s and ribs.
Wit me in my drawers and ‘Chelle in her thong
We fired up the crack pipe and lit up the bong.
I opened the fireplace, tossed in another log
We then listened to carols by Snoop Doggy Dogg.
Then out in the yard we heard a big hooptie thumpin’
We stopped all our tokin’, drinkin’ and humpin’.
We opened the front door, our gats at the ready
And who do it be but Eric Holder and Puff Daddy.
Dey both said “whazzup?” to dey posse gave a whistle
And from under their coats they all whipped out chrome-plated pistols
Dey was dressed all in Gucci from dey head to dey feet
And the blunt smoke encircled dey heads like a wreath.
With a case of malt liquor and a bucket o’ chicken
Dey busted up in my crib and made for da kitchen.
Dey ate all dey had brung then ate up mine
Dey drank all our 40’s then drank up our wine.
Eric and Diddy took the gifts from under our tree
but left a Bushmaster for Chelle and an AK for me!
“Peace out” dey shouted “See you bitches later”
as dey drove from my crib in a lowered Navigator.
Very well done indeed!
Blessed Advent to all...
“Here Comes Satan Claws, Here Comes Satan Claws...”
Err...excuse me lady, but there’s a frog humpin’ your shoulder.
Can’t forget the ever-popular “Deck Us All with Boston Charlie” (courtesy of Pogo and Walt Kelly):
Deck us all with Boston Charlie,
Walla Walla, Wash., an’ Kalamazoo!
Nora’s freezin’ on the trolley,
Swaller dollar cauliflower alley-garoo!
Don’t we know archaic barrel
Lullaby Lilla Boy, Louisville Lou?
Trolley Molly don’t love Harold,
Boola boola Pensacoola hullabaloo!
Bark us all bow-wows of folly,
Polly wolly cracker ‘n’ too-da-loo!
Donkey Bonny brays a carol,
Antelope Cantaloupe, ‘lope with you!
Hunky Dory’s pop is lolly gaggin’ on the wagon,
Willy, folly go through!
Chollie’s collie barks at Barrow,
Harum scarum five alarm bung-a-loo!
Dunk us all in bowls of barley,
Hinky dinky dink an’ polly voo!
Chilly Filly’s name is Chollie,
Chollie Filly’s jolly chilly view halloo!
Bark us all bow-wows of folly,
Double-bubble, toyland trouble! Woof, woof, woof!
Tizzy seas on melon collie!
Dibble-dabble, scribble-scrabble! Goof, goof, goof!
Tickle salty boss anchovie,
Wash a wash a wall Anna Kangaroo!
Ducky allus bows to Polly,
Prolly Wally would but har’ly do!
Dock us all a bowsprit, Solly,
Golly, Solly’s cold and so’s ol’ Lou!
Makes as much sense as an Old Joe Biden speech or the readability of legislation.
The kids don’t have much to be happy about Christmas, their parents don’t believe in giving them presents.
obama’s reason is...”We do stuff for them all year long” (paraphrase)
I see Kermit & Miss Piggy are still together.
Moochelle chanting in Black Liberation Theology style:
"White man greed"
"World in need"
"God dammmmm America!"
"God dammmmm America!"
The kids just lip-sync with both.
I love it! Did you write that?
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