Posted on 02/22/2012 1:07:59 PM PST by SmithL
Panhandling has always been an important part of human existence, ever since people were put in poverty by a society that sometimes lacks mercy. It is not fair or accurate to say that you should never give money to a panhandler. There are people who would perish without the generosity of strangers. We can not presume to know that they created their own problems and should reap the results. There are plenty of people who became poor largely due to circumstances that weren't under their control.
I have given coins out of my pocket to panhandlers under certain circumstances, and sometimes not, when I felt that it would jeopardize me or someone to do so. I have compiled a guide that works for me concerning when I give a few coins in my pocket or not. Since I rarely carry cash except for these few coins which serve as meter money or candy bar money, I am not in a situation of getting my wallet out.
To begin with, since I am a smoker I get asked for cigarettes a lot. However, many of those who ask me for one look like they could possibly be underage. In these instances, I always refuse. (I do not have to give a reason.) On the other hand, if someone appears close to my age and also does not appear to be an undercover cop, I will often give someone a smoke when asked. For those who believe that smoking is a horrendous evil, just ignore this part of the manuscript.
When someone is holding a sign at a freeway off ramp, I drive by without helping that person. I send that person good thoughts. However, I do not want to create a hazardous situation that could cause a car accident. You are not doing anyone a favor when you block traffic to give to a panhandler, especially when this causes a car accident that could entail someone getting injured.
Is someone appears threatening to me, I do not give help. This is entirely by my perception and does not rely on an attempt at objectivity. If I feel threatened, it is bad for me to help the person who is associated with that feeling, even if it is only in my own mind. I will remain polite to that person and will speak respectfully, but will not give money in return for intimidation. (Of course this idea does not include the IRS.) How do you know if someone is truly threatening you? Often you don't know and must operate by what feels real from your own limited perspective. If someone is exchanging threat for cash, it is not a gift, it is extortion. This is a bully-ism and is a different idea than the threat of a crime being perpetrated, which I cover next.
If it is late at night, if the situation seems scary, or if you think you could be a victim of robbery or violence, then you must do whatever works in that situation. Usually that entails getting some distance as quickly as possible, and doing so without increasing your vulnerability-which getting out your wallet or getting close to a person would do. I was in front of a Macy's at a mall when three gentlemen who appeared to be sporting a tough guy fashion, (you know, the goatees and scarves over the heads) approached me and one of them said, "Give it up." Rather than standing there waiting for them to get closer, I quickly stood from the bench (where I had been reading) and ran into the Macy's so that anything that would happen would be recorded by their security cameras. The three followed me in but then realized they were among Macy's shoppers, and they proceeded to look like idiots, and then they left.
A few years ago, I was in front of a McDonald's and had just bought a couple of hamburgers, when a man begged for help and said that he was starving to death and had problems with his blood sugar. I handed my hamburger to that man. He was quite grateful.
When I am on foot, and in public where everything feels safe, and someone asks for spare change in a respectful way (they do not need to humiliate themselves or beg, they just need to be polite) I will give that person whatever change is in my pocket, which might total less than a dollar, or which could be a couple dollars. If I had more income and if I carried cash more often, I would give more. In addition to the change I am offering, I am giving the message of unconditional love. This does something to better the human condition.
That is an excellent idea, and I have often wondered myself why those mega-rich guys aren't spending their money in such a practical way that could help many.
A panhandler, a young man, stood at an intersection where I would often be stopped at the light. I would give him a dollar now and again. Then one day I see him and he had one whole side of his face tattooed with a big black design like Kiss I think.
I never gave him another dollar.
Then I saw him there only now he is sitting in a wheelchair and he has had one foot amputated. I saw him one more time and he looked deathly ill, no doubt he was and I have never seen him again. Wasted life, very sad.
I never gave him another dollar.
So what's your point? That you stopped giving the young man a buck because you saw he had a tattoo??? How superficial! And later you saw him in a wheelchair apparently at death's door, and still couldn't bring yourself to toss him some change - purely out of sympathy? Are you suggesting there is something commendable about your turning a blind eye to that young man? Helping him out in some way - that's something to talk about. But proudly relating that you refused to give him another buck? How shallow.
I gave him money over a period of a year to help him, when he spent that money on a huge facial tattoo I don’t feel obligated to give him any more. He had to have someone in a van bring him and his wheelchair to that intersection, he could not have gotten to that wooded corner any other way.
I gave money to a man the other day who said he was collecting money so he could buy a truck for work, his tattoos didn’t stop me from giving him $10.
Did you ever consider that the tokens of money you gave him may have given him a bit of hope that maybe someone valued him? Maybe that day he was a little less than totally depressed and hopeless. When I give money to homeless people, I give it to show them in some small way that involves almost no sacrifice on my part that I value them as a human being. I don't expect that with the token I give them that they will then pull themselves up by their bootstraps. It is rather an affirmation of them as persons, of saying: "Here is a little something, my friend. I hope you have a better day today."
Good for you (I mean that sincerely). I apologize if I was too harsh - my comments were actually made in a more general sense.
Plus 1 on the VA. The people there would crawl over hot coals to get guys like this off the streets.
Maybe, maybe not. To the truly destitute yes. To the 20 year old kid who thinks it's neat to panhandle; no.
I know it is not right on some politically correct level, but we give most of our alms to the needy directly. It’s not tax deductable and that irks my husband, but he puts up with me - thank God. I get to know the problem and decide. Often it is just bad luck and things will change if you help direct it or give a break to someone when they need it. It strikes me in the process of living because I am alert.
Since the welfare system is geared towards minorities and permanently poor people, I focus on white working class who are outside the welfare system but struggling to survive. White Americans don’t like asking for state assistance when they need a boost. There are no help from whitey tribalist organizations and activists (which is a good thing, OWS). Whites are expected to be super human and help everyone else. They will struggle and just need a life preserver to get their footing or get a break. Call it racist. That is what I do from experience.
I pay for glasses, sports team fees, back to school supplies, health care costs to the hospital, gas, school tutition, or at the grocery check out when working moms are embarassingly short. You can see good people struggling all around you. You watch for the dad trying to get two pairs of pants for each kid in the fall within budget and you just line up behind them and give the check out clerk your credit card and tell the dad, it is from (insert your lover’s name) back-to-school foundation (health care boost foundation, sports equipment or fee foundation, the school tutition foundation, the food or gas foundation...) and pay the bill.
I think everyone should look out for the working class, who can afford to give away money. They are at least trying and deserve help when you can give a boost to them, especially when they have children. I do it as discretely and impersonal as possible and this is the only way most will accept any gift.
You don’t ask if you can help because the working class will reject it; you just do it because you want to make someone’s life more blessed that day. Maybe they prayed for help and that is why you noticed them. Maybe that is why I come upon them.
Give big tips to working class people who do an excellect job, and if more people did this, they would make as much as me and fixing my overflowing toilet which is much more important than writing and negoating contracts in the scheme of things! If my car did not work, I would not make it to work. My car mechanic - the man and not the shop owner - is tops in my life. To me, this is the way free people do “social justice” without the government.
"Clueless pushovers?" Not necessarily. More like "misguided victims of their own guilt."
as you clutch your pocketbook to your bosom,
You forgot the part about stealing Tiny Tim's crutch to sell for firewood and kicking the old lady out of her wheelchair just for laughs ...
justifying a selfishness
Is it "selfish" to want to keep that which is mine? Is it selfish to deny sustenance to those that haven't earned it? Is it selfish to give a man a fish when he needs to learn to fish for himself? Then I wear the title with pride.
Then there's the matter of "justifying." I needn't justify my actions to you or anyone else. The money is mine, not the panhandlers'. How I dispose of it is entirely my own decision and no one else's -- regardless of how vastly superior their moral fiber.
you would not even part with a pittance.
So are you to be admired for having the self-described decency to actually part with a pittance? If it is so trivial, how can you be said to be generous in your giving? It means nothing to you so is of no consequence, yet you trumpet your gift as though it were infinite largesse.
Spare me the guilt trip. I could walk by bums all day long with cnotes dripping from my vest pockets and not feel bad. But then, I'm not holier than thou.
It may be true that you do not have to justify your actions to any person, but you will give an account of what you do with your money:
"For we will all stand before God’s judgment seat. It is written: 'As surely as I live,' says the Lord, ‘every knee will bow before me; every tongue will acknowledge God.’” So then, each of us will give an account of ourselves to God." Romans 12:10-12
the money is mine...
Two things are certain. One day every penny of our precious money will be distributed to others, and they will do with it as they please. Second, we will answer for the selfishness of our hearts, and how we responded to Jesus' command:
"Give to him who asks of you, and do not turn away from him who wants to borrow from you." Matthew 5:42
And,
"Then the Lord said to him, “Now then, you Pharisees clean the outside of the cup and dish, but inside you are full of greed and wickedness. You foolish people! Did not the one who made the outside make the inside also? But now as for what is inside you — be generous to the poor, and everything will be clean for you." Luke 11:39-41
Spare me the guilt trip. I could walk by bums all day long with cnotes dripping from my vest pockets and not feel bad.
I would not want to enter into judgment having lived with such an attitude, for in the above passage Jesus very next words consist of a dire warning:
“Woe to you Pharisees..."
You may also want to consider that your self-righteous judgment will itself be judged before that very same throne.
For that very reason, I donate to my local shelter, whom I know serves many veterans. Helps them out, get clean, gives a place to stay, help get their lives straight. I also give me mony to my church, where I also know where that money goes. I do not feed homeless people money to feed their addictions. PERIOD!
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