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Lazamataz Leaves FR! The Big Oh-P***!
My Fevered Brow | 1/31/2013 | By Laz A. Mataz

Posted on 01/30/2013 10:23:05 AM PST by Lazamataz

First, please click on this music link. This is a necessary part of the effect. Got it playing? Good! Now proceed with my Opus.

I have finally decided that enough is enough. This is my "oh,piss".

The reasons I am leaving Free Republic are three:

WAYCISM: Everyone is so RACIST on Free RepubliKKK. You all constantly post "Must be the Amish" and "Oh, those Amish again" or "Definitely the Amish" when some inner-city hoodlum starts with the shenannigans. That is so WAY RACIST that I call it "WAYSIS"!

I happen to BE an Amish, and I am tired of being blamed for everything. This is a picture of me on my bike.

I have heard it conjectured that the word "Amish" is a code word referring to a person of color, but I can prove that this is not true. Here is a picture of my Amish friend Jebediah. He is my BEST FRIEND and the Best Man in my wedding:

LACK OF ENDORSEMENT OF HOMOSEXUALITY: Then there is the fact that you are all on the wrong side of history (and the shower-soap) when it comes to butterfly-bowel-love. When it comes to homosexuality, we should be sensitive and loving to the giggling little donut-punchers. Never insult the pearl-necklace adorned tumblebunnies, or demean the limp-wristed prancing knob-jockeys in any way. There is nothing wrong with being a petal-covered swishing basket-burglar! If you are an effeminate queenie-baby genuflecting chicken licker, BE PROUD! Discrimination is no longer allowed to be directed at loafer-lightening grass-tickling pounders of fudge. NEVER! No, sir!It is time that we embrace the stool-pushed jolly-ranching graduates of the Assmasters school of backseat driving! Let us once and for all, put aside the prejudice against pink-sequin-adorned squeeze-friendly rectum-flagelators! Why must Free Republic be so hostile to Barbie hugging Broadway-showgirl tootsie-roll-eating lizard worshipers? The hostility I see exhibited to rump-radar-pinging, butterbutt loving, feathered drag princesses horrific, on this forum. There is no way that crisco-hoarding, rainbow-prancing, Fucsia Puffed batty boys deserve this sort of treatment. Can we STOP being so cruel to glitter-loving tail-tickling Cleveland Steamer pooftahs? Can we EVER be civil to three-dollar-bill-collecting rollerblading fan-TAS-tic sword swallowers? Why can't Free Republic be kinder to gerbil-feeding flower sniffing rainbow-squatting bottoms-up boys? This forum is so cruel to chalk-licking lavender sniffing cheeky merrymonkey pole-vaulters! Why are we so cruel to silent-screaming bed-bouncing pump-wearing butt pilots??!? It is wrong to single out and criticize the feminine-acting, stick-twiddling parade-marching ball-jugglers. They cannot help it that they are merrily-hopping NPR-listening musical-favoring chin-trauma patients. Do not ever again mock the whinnying crochet-loving sweetwater flaming mushroom-polishers and the sweetly-flaming pole-licking sequin-wearing arsehole patrollers.

So, it is clear that you are ALL on the wrong side of history and morality, and it is time that I must leave Free Republic because of it.

EXCESSIVE VIOLINS:

You are all so violet here on Free Republic. There is so much violins! I see violin talk ALL THE TIME on this forum. People talk about 'stringing people up' and 'making them face music' and 'fingering their necks' all the time. They talk about 'drawing a bow' across them, and 'playing them like a fiddle', and other such violin references. I cannot take the violins here any more.

This is so sad. I am sad because things didn't go my way. Maybe something didn't work out the way I hoped. My feelings got hurt. I feel sad that someone let me down, left me out, or hurt my feelings with something he or she said. I lost something special. Maybe I lost something that was special to me. Or maybe my favorite shirt got shrunk in the wash and now I can't wear it anymore. I miss someone. I might feel sad when I'm missing someone or have to say goodbye. Maybe my favorite friend moved to a new state, or my big brother went away to college, or my parent is away on vacation. I heard about something sad. I might feel sad when I watch a sad movie, read a sad part in a book, or someone tells me about a sad thing that happened. If someone I care about is sad, I might feel sad, too. And what if someone dies> It's natural to feel sad if someone dies, like a close relative, or I lose a pet. That kind of sadness has a special name — grief. A problem makes me sad. Problems like bullying, friendship troubles, or difficult work schedules can sometimes make me feel sad.

So, it is so hard to leave, but I must, because Free Republic was SO MUCH BETTER before, and now it is SO MUCH WORSE. In fact, it was SO MUCH BETTER mere seconds ago, and now it is SO MUCH WORSE a few seconds from now. Every second that ticks by, Free Republic just imploded completely, because you all are so awful, and I am so great. I really am so great. Here I am, as a matter of fact.



TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Miscellaneous; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: bestohpissever; opiss; opus; revesupotsrow; snettikgnikiv; ztbi
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To: onyx

I couldn’t believe my good fortune when I saw that picture. Talk about my favorite people in the world, and all in one place with me in the middle! I do love it.

FRmail.


441 posted on 02/01/2013 11:45:23 AM PST by TheOldLady
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To: TheOldLady

I’ve replied.

I love the picture!


442 posted on 02/01/2013 11:49:10 AM PST by onyx (FREE REPUBLIC IS HERE TO STAY! DONATE MONTHLY! IF YOU WANT ON SARAH PALIN''S PING LIST, LET ME KNOW)
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To: onyx
Thank goodness

Okay, that's it, you're getting a divorce and coming over to our house for forced watching, um, er.....reeducation........

More 1's

:-)

443 posted on 02/01/2013 11:50:38 AM PST by Lakeshark (!)
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To: Lakeshark

LOL. No divorce!
Who’s that guy?
He has the look of a Nettles.


444 posted on 02/01/2013 11:54:42 AM PST by onyx (FREE REPUBLIC IS HERE TO STAY! DONATE MONTHLY! IF YOU WANT ON SARAH PALIN''S PING LIST, LET ME KNOW)
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To: onyx
Nik Stauskas.

Likely the best shooter in NCAA basketball, he's from, of all places, Canada, and he's just a freshman.

More #'s other than 1's to look at........

We're gonna make it to 1,000 posts!!!

445 posted on 02/01/2013 11:59:28 AM PST by Lakeshark (!)
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To: TheOldLady; onyx; Lazamataz; KC_Lion; trisham; DJ MacWoW; JoeProBono; RedMDer; musicman; ...

Thank you very much, dearest Lady!!

Woo hoo!!

And we have incoming:

$20.00 from South Dakota - “Freedom isn’t free!”
$25.00 from California
$5.00 from Kansas - “In Honor of Onyx’s picture with Laz.”
$10.00 from Nevada
$10.00 monthly from Indiana
$100.00 from South Dakota - “To match 10 New Monthly Donors.”
$30.00 from New York
$20.00 from Florida

Thank you ALL very much!!

Your loyal support is greatly appreciated!!

FReepers ROCK!!


446 posted on 02/01/2013 12:03:56 PM PST by Jim Robinson (Resistance to tyrants is obedience to God!!)
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To: onyx

Replied too.


447 posted on 02/01/2013 12:05:56 PM PST by TheOldLady
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To: TheOldLady; Lazamataz; KC_Lion; DJ MacWoW; Lakeshark; trisham; musicman; Lady Jag; moose07; ...

THANK YOU SO MUCH, FReeper PATRIOT DONORS!!!!!

MORE OF YOUR GENEROUS DONATIONS IN FROM ON LAZ'S THREAD!!!

Thank you very much, dearest Lady!!

Woo hoo!!

And we have incoming:

$20.00 from South Dakota - Freedom isnt free!
$25.00 from California
$5.00 from Kansas - In Honor of Onyxs picture with Laz.
$10.00 from Nevada
$10.00 monthly from Indiana
$100.00 from South Dakota - To match 10 New Monthly Donors.
$30.00 from New York
$20.00 from Florida

Thank you ALL very much!!

Your loyal support is greatly appreciated!!

FReepers ROCK!!




FReepers ARE THE ABSOLUTE BEST!!!!!


448 posted on 02/01/2013 12:09:21 PM PST by onyx (FREE REPUBLIC IS HERE TO STAY! DONATE MONTHLY! IF YOU WANT ON SARAH PALIN''S PING LIST, LET ME KNOW)
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To: Lazamataz
Laz leaves FR!!


449 posted on 02/01/2013 12:10:29 PM PST by dead (I've got my eye out for Mullah Omar.)
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To: dead; Lazamataz

heh heh...


450 posted on 02/01/2013 12:13:18 PM PST by TADSLOS ( "I ask sir, what is the militia? It is the whole people except for a few politicians."-George Mason)
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To: TADSLOS; P-Marlowe

If you’ve not read this, then you have missed the Hallmark thread of the week.

You must click the music link before you begin reading.

Definitely one for the archives.


451 posted on 02/01/2013 12:17:44 PM PST by xzins (Retired Army Chaplain and Proud of It! True supporters of our troops pray for their victory!)
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To: FReepers; Patriots
Thank You Wonderful, Fabulous FReeper PATRIOT DONORS!!!!

YOUR LOYAL SUPPORT IS TRULY & GREATLY APPRECIATED!


THANK YOU VERY MUCH, CALIFORNIA, FLORIDA, INDIANA, KANSAS, NEVADA, NEW YORK & 2 SOUTH DAKOTA FReepers!!!!

Thank you all very much!

Your loyal support is greatly appreciated!!

FReepers ROCK!!

~Jim




GOD BLESS AND KEEP YOU ALL
The Place for Conservatives

   2013 Q1 Scoreboard — ranked by total receipts   


Rank Location Receipts Monthlies
Total # Avg/Per Total # Avg/Per
1
California
$3,731.00 104 $35.88 $1,024.00 73 $14.03
2
Texas
2,724.95 93 29.30 1,043.00 65 16.05
3
Pennsylvania
1,670.00 42 39.76 225.00 17 13.24
4 New York 1,510.00 35 43.14 240.00 20 12.00
5 Florida 1,355.00 59 22.97 845.00 47 17.98
6 Virginia 1,178.00 43 27.40 453.00 28 16.18
7 North Carolina 1,110.00 28 39.64 345.00 18 19.17
8 Georgia 995.00 24 41.46 265.00 18 14.72
9 Ohio 931.00 27 34.48 306.00 23 13.30
10 Maryland 868.50 23 37.76 302.50 17 17.79
11 Arkansas 715.00 14 51.07 145.00 7 20.71
12 Michigan 681.00 25 27.24 176.67 12 14.72
13 Colorado 660.00 21 31.43 280.00 16 17.50
14 Washington 650.00 19 34.21 285.00 16 17.81
15 New Hampshire 600.00 7 85.71 90.00 5 18.00
16 Massachusetts 531.00 22 24.14 301.00 16 18.81
17 Mississippi 511.00 11 46.45 161.00 7 23.00
18 Connecticut 510.00 9 56.67 40.00 3 13.33
19 Australia 500.00 1 500.00 10.00 1 10.00
20 Tennessee 478.00 23 20.78 145.00 12 12.08
21 South Carolina 475.00 15 31.67 110.00 9 12.22
22 Nevada 465.00 13 35.77 110.00 8 13.75
23 Missouri 445.00 20 22.25 200.00 13 15.38
24 Louisiana 438.00 8 54.75 148.00 9 16.44
25 Arizona 418.00 19 22.00 230.00 14 16.43
26 Illinois 411.00 20 20.55 206.00 13 15.85
27 New Jersey 395.00 16 24.69 55.00 4 13.75
28 Oklahoma 380.00 13 29.23 255.00 13 19.62
29 Alabama 370.00 15 24.67 225.00 12 18.75
30 Switzerland 300.00 1 300.00
31 New Mexico 295.00 7 42.14 50.00 4 12.50
32 Wisconsin 277.00 12 23.08 177.00 12 14.75
33 Oregon 256.96 14 18.35 130.00 8 16.25
34 Minnesota 240.00 14 17.14 205.00 14 14.64
35 Nebraska 230.00 7 32.86 30.00 3 10.00
36 Indiana 205.00 15 13.67 165.00 14 11.79
37 Canada 188.00 6 31.33 35.00 3 11.67
38 Kansas 185.00 12 15.42 135.00 11 12.27
39 Alaska 170.00 6 28.33 100.00 3 33.33
40 Delaware 161.00 5 32.20 10.00 1 10.00
41 South Dakota 160.00 5 32.00 25.00 3 8.33
42 United Kingdom 150.00 4 37.50 30.00 1 30.00
43 Montana 145.00 5 29.00 95.00 4 23.75
44 Kentucky 100.00 3 33.33 60.00 3 20.00
45 North Dakota 100.00 1 100.00
46 Vermont 85.00 4 21.25 65.00 3 21.67
47 Maine 82.00 4 20.50 27.00 2 13.50
48 Hawaii 75.00 6 12.50 140.00 8 17.50
49 Norway 70.00 2 35.00 20.00 1 20.00
50 Iowa 65.00 3 21.67 40.00 2 20.00
51 Utah 65.00 3 21.67 70.00 3 23.33
52 Idaho 60.00 4 15.00 80.00 5 16.00
53 Germany 60.00 4 15.00
54 West Virginia 50.00 2 25.00 65.00 2 32.50
55 Thailand 50.00 1 50.00
56 Wyoming 35.00 2 17.50 10.00 1 10.00
57 Rhode Island 30.00 1 30.00 30.00 1 30.00
58 El Salvador 30.00 1 30.00
59 Puerto Rico 25.00 1 25.00
60 District of Columbia 10.00 1 10.00 10.00 1 10.00
61 Israel 10.00 1 10.00
62 Armed Forces - Pacific 5.00 1 5.00 5.00 1 5.00
Never Never Land 865.00 32 27.03 825.00 69 11.96
63 locations total $30,541.41 959 $31.85 $10,855.17 699 $15.53

452 posted on 02/01/2013 12:21:34 PM PST by onyx (FREE REPUBLIC IS HERE TO STAY! DONATE MONTHLY! IF YOU WANT ON SARAH PALIN''S PING LIST, LET ME KNOW)
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To: dead

453 posted on 02/01/2013 12:21:39 PM PST by Lazamataz (LAZ'S LAW: As an argument with liberals goes on, the probability of being called racist approaches 1)
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To: onyx

Sorry, your list is wrong, Michigan is # 1: http://collegebasketball.ap.org/herald-dispatch/poll


454 posted on 02/01/2013 12:37:43 PM PST by Lakeshark (!)
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To: Lakeshark

But Florida is going to win it all.


455 posted on 02/01/2013 12:38:20 PM PST by dfwgator
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To: onyx; upchuck; LibLieSlayer; BooBoo1000; glock rocks; jazusamo; Monthly Donors; All; Patriots
Thank you very much, Nevada FReeper!!

The New Monthly Donor Count!!

Three Rounds of Ten Are Complete!!
Thank you, upchuck, LibLieSlayer, and BooBoo1000!!

The Count for Round 4 is 7!!

These FReepers have paid or will pay $10 for each New Monthly Sign-up!!
glock rocks has prepaid for Round 4
jazusamo has prepaid for 5 NMDs in Round 5
somebody will sponsor 5 NMDs in Round 5
South Dakota FReeper has prepaid for Round 6

WOO HOO!! 37 NEW MONTHLY DONORS SO FAR THIS FREEPATHON!!
Including 8 New Dollar-A-Day Donors!!





456 posted on 02/01/2013 12:45:33 PM PST by TheOldLady
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To: dfwgator
No way.......the only two teams they played that were any good beat them........

I doubt they make it beyond the 16.

457 posted on 02/01/2013 12:45:36 PM PST by Lakeshark (!)
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To: Lakeshark; dfwgator
Sorry, your list is wrong, Michigan is # 1: http://collegebasketball.ap.org/herald-dispatch/poll

Sadly, in basketball, they actually have a tournament.

458 posted on 02/01/2013 12:46:27 PM PST by xzins (Retired Army Chaplain and Proud of It! True supporters of our troops pray for their victory!)
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To: xzins

Yes, of which we’ve already won two, thank you very much.


459 posted on 02/01/2013 12:47:13 PM PST by dfwgator
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To: xzins; dfwgator
in basketball, they actually have a tournament.

Of course they do.

But it's fun to trash talk early.......

:-)

460 posted on 02/01/2013 12:49:34 PM PST by Lakeshark (!)
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