You Too Can Make Millions "Flipping" Houses (As Seen on TV)

Townhall ^ | 02/26/2014 | Mike Shedlock

[SeekAndFind]

I have been under constant barrage of unsolicited phone calls recently. The phone calls typically begin with the same lie: "Mr. Shedlock you told a colleague of mine a few months ago to call you back when we have a really good investment opportunity".

Given that I never ask anyone to call back, they are known liars from the start. Depending on what kind of mood I am in, I may hang up immediately or listen long enough to hear what kind of nonsense they are peddling.

I asked one of the liars the name of his colleague that called. He answered George. I said "George who?".

The caller got exasperated and replied "Washington".

The predominant thing these guys are peddling is the opportunity to lose a lot of money fast, frequently in the oil or natural gas industry. But lately the charlatans have pestered me with real estate opportunities, shorting gold, and buying microcap stocks I have never heard of (most likely the classic pump-and-dump) variety.

This is the kind of thing that happens at market tops. Everyone wants in, and the fraudsters come out in force to take advantage.

Nonetheless, I offer my standard warning: Just because this activity happens at peaks, does not mean this is the peak.

Sentiment typically gets more extreme than anyone thinks possible.

Social Media Bubble

Facebook recently paid $19 billion for WhatsApp, a company with 55 employees and no revenue.

Supposedly this is a good deal because WhatsApp is growing fast. It is growing fast because it has a cute texting app that it gives away for free.

How many customers would it have if it starts charging? Enough for a $19 billion valuation? Not a chance.

Pater Tenebrarum has interesting discussion in his commentary "Social Media Bubble".

Flipping Yet Again

Meanwhile, this farcical ad popped up on my screen just today.



Want to know what "As seen on TV" means?"

Typically it is a sleazy phrase that means they ran an ad somewhere on TV, at least once.

Such ads usually run on an obscure channel at 3:00AM. But hey, it's "as seen on TV". They never said "in a show".

Please note the little asterisk that reads "results based on effort".

Also note a word is missing. Here is the split sentence combined "Learn How to Get Started Flipping Houses Than Merrill - Star of A&E's "Flip This House"

The ad makes no sense unless your mind inserts the word "Better" right after the word "Houses".

I have a simple question: didn't we try this before?

[babble-on]

What could possibly go wrong? Millions of people borrowing money, intending to hold assets for a short period of time and sell for huge gains?

[Albion Wilde]

“Than Merrill” is a person whose nickname is Than and whose whole name is Nathaniel.

[SeekAndFind]

RE: “Than Merrill” is a person whose nickname is Than and whose whole name is Nathaniel.

Why not call himself Nathan instead?

[Cementjungle]

I'm getting ready to sell my "get rich by helping others get rich" video.

In it I sit there for an hour explaining the steps involved:

1. Make video explaining how to make a video.

2. Explain in video that millions will want to buy your video

3. Explain in video that people will pay you to tell them that others will pay them to hear this advice

4. Sell video. Get rich. Buy island and yacht.

[Leaning Right]

I asked one of the liars the name of his colleague that called. He answered George. I said "George who?". The caller got exasperated and replied "Washington".

The author of this article, Mr. Shedlock, is an idiot. He gets a phone call from our first president (probably via some sort of time portal), and all he does is whine about it.

[woodbutcher1963]

Actually, I know 2 people that “flip” houses and have been doing it for years. It takes capital. You have to be able to make an offer or buy a property as soon as it comes on the market. Typically here in NH that means you have $300K to $500K cash on hand or a bank credit line for at least that. This is not Detroit or Cleveland where you can buy houses for under $50K.

The other thing that both of these contractors have in common is they get their hands dirty. They do not hire other contractors to do all the work like you see so often on TV. My one friend has a bulldozer, backhoe and an excavator. He also has a full woodworking shop to do any millwork projects himself. These guys drive pick up trucks not Porsches.

[nhwingut]

There is one flip show that has a smoking hot blonde.

[DJ MacWoW]

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[SeekAndFind]

RE: There is one flip show that has a smoking hot blonde.

Pics please. There are rules you know...

[proxy_user]

This TV show and money-making scheme is not about doing it the right way. Of course, skilled businessmen with capital can make money. This advertisement is aimed at dummies with no capital.

[Still Thinking]

Or “Nate”? Or “Nat”? Those are all common nicknames for Nathan or Nathaniel.

[TomGuy]

"Mr. Shedlock you told a colleague of mine a few months ago to call you back when we have a really good investment opportunity".

Interesting pitch.

When I had the landline, I frequently got those, "Since you own your home there, ... "

I would interrupt, "No, I rent."

{click}

I knew they were either selling siding or windows. Occasionally, they might be trying to sell resurfacing the driveway.

They were, however, less problematic than the 'I calling from the Fraternal Order of Law-persons for your area ...' or 'I calling from the social service organization that provides work for the disabled in your area ... and our 10-year guaranteed lightbulbs are only $5.00 a piece ...'

[One time, I succumbed and bought the lighbulbs. The bulbs didn't last as long as the K-Mart specials. Of course, there was no way to get hold of them to honor the guarantee, because there really wasn't one.]

[KarlInOhio]

Still working on phase 2.

[Gaffer]

It AMAZES me. Any number of supposedly rich real estate, small internet company or house-flipping MILLIONAIRES hawking their schemes (DVDs, brochures and hotel ballroom sessions) to thousands and thousands of people hoping to strike it rich like them - using NO MONEY OF THEIR OWN to do it!

They, the rubes, eat it up like high grade slop, pigs to the slaughter so to speak.

They never ask the question “If this _______ is a MILLIONAIRE doing this, why in the hell is he trying to get me to buy his DVDs to do the same thing?”

I guess it’s because they’re humanitarians and just want to make everybody rich, huh?

[dfwgator]

You can be a Millionaire and never pay taxes.

First, go and get a million dollars.

Then when the IRS comes to your door, saying ‘you haven’t paid taxes’, just say “I forgot.”

-Steve Martin

[Still Thinking]

Well, actually the call wasn’t from GW per se. George was “an associate” of the guy who called. Maybe the guy’s 250 — what do I know?

In a similar note, I hate those people who call trying to see you car repair warranties. One time someone said the warranty on my car was about to expire.

I figured they were just fishing so I asked “Which one?” “The one you bought last” “Well, what make and model, maybe your records are incomplete and I bought another one you don’t know about yet. What model year?” So his script totally breaks down and I read him the riot act for like two minutes about how making false statements over the phone to sell a product was fraud and he, personally, was lower than the stuff I occasionally have to scrape off my shoe. For some bizarre reason, he still thought he was an honest salesman. At least that was two minutes he wasn’t ripping someone else off.

[Flash Bazbeaux]

I have a friend who has done very well flipping houses.

She 1) had a broker’s license even before the crash of 2008;

2) has a close relative who knows another real estate broker who is unusually adept at finding bargains

3) knows a few people with LOTS of available cash;

4) has a very good real estate attorney.

All of the above get a chunk of the action, except the attorney who bills for services rendered.

She was doing it for a couple of years when the advertisements started up. Which was right around the time she said it was becoming more difficult.

The limiting factor has been cash. Anyone who tells you that you can flip houses without cash is either lying, or is going to advise you to do something illegal.

[dfwgator]

Yep cash is king. You have to move fast and having the cash on hand is the only way.

[ifinnegan]

Phase two is to donate the underpants to charity and take it off your taxes, just like the Clinton’s did.