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"Your Daddy Was Drunk and Your Mama Was Lonely" - my first country song [mega-vanity]
Me, via YouTube ^ | 7/31/14 | Me, as "Hopalong Ginsberg"

Posted on 07/31/2014 1:05:12 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows

After a great deal of hard work and numerous cuss words I've finally recorded my first song. The song is titled "Your Daddy Was Drunk and Your Mama Was Lonely," and I don't think that I can add much to that. If you like country music, or even if you don't, I'd appreciate if you'd give it a listen and give me your honest opinion. (Yes, I know what I'm in for by saying that, and no, no Butthurt Report Form will be necessary.)

A few quick notes:

1) When I registered with ASCAP "Slings and Arrows" was taken, so I used "Hopalong Ginsberg" instead. (A free virtual lollipop to those who catch the reference.)

2) Yes, I know what my voice sounds like. That's why I'm an aspiring songwriter instead of singer.

3) If you like the song, or even if you don't like the song, you can download the MP3 for free here. Take two, they're small.

4) So that I have an excuse to ping my kitty ping list:



TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor; Music/Entertainment
KEYWORDS: kittyping; napl
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Fire away!
1 posted on 07/31/2014 1:05:12 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows
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To: Slings and Arrows; Glenn; republicangel; Beaker; BADROTOFINGER; etabeta; asgardshill; devane617; ...
Massive-abuse-of-listowner's-privilege ping!


2 posted on 07/31/2014 1:07:14 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Just going from the title, are you addressing this to either our current President or to one Wm. Clinton?


3 posted on 07/31/2014 1:07:53 PM PDT by Pearls Before Swine
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To: Slings and Arrows
Great title. Have you dedicated this song to Chelsea?


4 posted on 07/31/2014 1:07:55 PM PDT by Responsibility2nd (NO LIBS. This Means Liberals and (L)libertarians! Same Thing. NO LIBS!!)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Ok, for you, I’ll listen. Anyone who runs a kitteh ping list can’t be all bad!


5 posted on 07/31/2014 1:08:53 PM PDT by Shimmer1 (Ok, the joke's over. Bring back the Constitution.)
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To: Pearls Before Swine; Responsibility2nd

Great art speaks to many people. ;^)


6 posted on 07/31/2014 1:09:25 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

"Your Daddy Was Drunk and Your Mama Was Lonely"

"What does Nancy Pelosi tell John Boehner every day?"


7 posted on 07/31/2014 1:10:09 PM PDT by COBOL2Java (I'm a Christian, pro-life, pro-gun, Reaganite. The GOP hates me. Why should I vote for them?)
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To: Shimmer1

> Ok, for you, I’ll listen. Anyone who runs a kitteh ping list can’t be all bad!

MUAHAHAHAHAHA...err, I mean “Thank you very much.”


8 posted on 07/31/2014 1:10:15 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Problem. I can’t tell what the words are saying. Must be my ears, as others are “getting” it.


9 posted on 07/31/2014 1:10:41 PM PDT by Shimmer1 (Ok, the joke's over. Bring back the Constitution.)
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To: COBOL2Java

*BING*


10 posted on 07/31/2014 1:10:51 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Good job!


11 posted on 07/31/2014 1:12:00 PM PDT by Prince of Space (Be Breitbart, baby. LIFB.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

OK

My bro is a redneck let me see if he likes it


12 posted on 07/31/2014 1:12:17 PM PDT by GeronL (Vote for Conservatives not for Republicans)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Nice!

How did you get the Philharmonic Orchestra to back you up?


13 posted on 07/31/2014 1:13:07 PM PDT by caver (Obama: Home of the Whopper)
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To: Shimmer1

Sounds OK to me, but I’m prejudiced. Maybe this will help:

“Your Daddy Was Drunk And Your Mama Was Lonely”
—Hopalong Ginsberg

Come over here, Junior,
And sit on Daddy’s knees.
It’s time your father told you ‘bout
The birds and the bees.
The stork, he didn’t bring you.
There weren’t no cabbage leaf.
So just be glad you’re ‘round here, boy,
And don’t give me no grief, ‘cause
You wouldn’t even be here,
Except and only
That your Daddy was drunk
And your Mama was lonely.

I was truckin’ through Shreveport
With a double heavy load;
Been weeks since I’d had any,
I was fixin’ to explode.
Went into a juke joint,
Just to get me some relief,
And that’s where I saw your Mama
Killing rats with her teeth.
She was mean and she was nasty -
I weren’t sure if I should -
But after six or seven beers
She started lookin’ pretty good.
I said “Hey, come on baby,
You wanna see my truck?”
So we went out to my rig
And we had a good time.

Came back nine months later,
I was ready for the worst,
And sure enough, your Mama
She was just about to burst.
Her Pa was waitin’ with her,
His shotgun in his hand,
And half an hour later we were
With the preacher man.
The preacher man he told us
“To death do us part,”
So every day I thank the Lord
I’ve got a bad heart.

So that’s...
Where you come from, Junior,
Hope the story ain’t upsettin’.
But some brothers or some sisters, boy,
You best had be forgettin’.
You bet I learned my lesson,
Bet I learned it well,
And I know there’s deeper levels
to this country music hell.
No, there’ll be no hanky-panky,
Except and only
If your Daddy is drunk
And your Mama is lonely.


14 posted on 07/31/2014 1:14:09 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

lolz


15 posted on 07/31/2014 1:14:15 PM PDT by GeronL (Vote for Conservatives not for Republicans)
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To: Prince of Space

Thanks!


16 posted on 07/31/2014 1:14:30 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: GeronL

Thanks; please do.


17 posted on 07/31/2014 1:15:16 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: GeronL

That’s the intended effect.


18 posted on 07/31/2014 1:15:38 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: GeronL

It was perfect. gonna save it for for when my best friend rolls into town.


19 posted on 07/31/2014 1:16:08 PM PDT by sopwith (LIVE FREE OR DIE)
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To: Slings and Arrows

I’m linking it to Facebook to see the reactions


20 posted on 07/31/2014 1:16:34 PM PDT by GeronL (Vote for Conservatives not for Republicans)
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To: Slings and Arrows

That has an honest authenticity , i LIKE it! :)


21 posted on 07/31/2014 1:18:22 PM PDT by moose07 (the truth will out ,one day. Doggies Rock.)
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To: caver
Nice!

How did you get the Philharmonic Orchestra to back you up?

That's just my native skill at composition and arrangement...

BS Meter photo bsmeter.gif

...that's because GarageBand doesn't have a country fiddle patch, and the closest I could come was synth strings.

22 posted on 07/31/2014 1:18:34 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

LOL

Actually funny and good timing on the words.

If you have the tracks I can sing a couple versions and send em back, free.

But, it’s kinda raunchy fun. Trying to think of a band that this would be perfect for. Name escapes me.

I’d ad lib a part “yeah but, yer Mom was loaded” or something.,

Fun song.


23 posted on 07/31/2014 1:18:52 PM PDT by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously-you won't live through it anyway-Enjoy Yourself ala Louis Prima)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Well done!


24 posted on 07/31/2014 1:19:15 PM PDT by humblegunner
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To: sopwith; GeronL

Thanks again!


25 posted on 07/31/2014 1:19:31 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Hopalong Ginsberg?

There’s a Steven Wright joke there, son, and here it comes...

One day I got on the bus, and when I stepped in, I saw the most gorgeous blond Chinese girl. I sat beside her.

I said, ‘Hi’, And she said, ‘Hi’, and then I said, ‘Nice day, isn’t it?’.

And she said, ‘I saw my analyst today and he says I have a problem.’

So I asked, ‘What’s the problem?’ She replied, ‘I can’t tell you. I don’t even know you.’

I said, ‘Well, sometimes it’s good to tell your problems to a perfect stranger on a bus.’

So she said, ‘Well, my analyst said I’m a nymphomaniac and I only like Jewish cowboys... By the way, my name is Denise.’

I said, ‘Hello, Denise. My name is Bucky Goldstein.’.


26 posted on 07/31/2014 1:20:08 PM PDT by Responsibility2nd (NO LIBS. This Means Liberals and (L)libertarians! Same Thing. NO LIBS!!)
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To: Shimmer1

Its recorded low.

You’ll need a player, not me, that can enhance.


27 posted on 07/31/2014 1:20:31 PM PDT by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously-you won't live through it anyway-Enjoy Yourself ala Louis Prima)
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To: humblegunner

Wow! That’s like Mikey liking my cereal!


28 posted on 07/31/2014 1:20:42 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Responsibility2nd

Enjoy your virtual lollipop.


29 posted on 07/31/2014 1:21:36 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Responsibility2nd
If you're going to dedicate it to Chelsea, the title should read.... "Your Daddy Was Drunk and Your Mama Was Homely,"
30 posted on 07/31/2014 1:22:58 PM PDT by DannyTN (I)
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To: Slings and Arrows
I know what my voice sounds like. That's why I'm an aspiring songwriter instead of singer.

One word... Autotune.

Check out apps like Tune Me on Google Play.

-PJ

31 posted on 07/31/2014 1:24:29 PM PDT by Political Junkie Too (If you are the Posterity of We the People, then you are a Natural Born Citizen.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

It was still good! The only thing I can play is the radio!


32 posted on 07/31/2014 1:24:29 PM PDT by caver (Obama: Home of the Whopper)
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To: Responsibility2nd

ROTFLMAO!!!

Heard that in the 80’s at a comedy club in Dallas.

I actually spit my drink out twice. Cuz how often do you see a beautiful blonde Chinese woman and the punch line was too much.


33 posted on 07/31/2014 1:24:35 PM PDT by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously-you won't live through it anyway-Enjoy Yourself ala Louis Prima)
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To: Vendome

Glad you liked the song, not sure what to do about the volume; it sounded fine to me. (Famous last words, I know.) You have GarageBand?


34 posted on 07/31/2014 1:24:46 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Political Junkie Too

Thanks, I’ll take a look. Seriously, though, I genuinely prefer songwriting to performing.


35 posted on 07/31/2014 1:26:47 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Responsibility2nd

“Have you dedicated this song to Chelsea?”

Well, who would the daddy be anyway in this case? Clearly, Bill ain’t the daddy. Chelsea looks NOTHING like him at all.


36 posted on 07/31/2014 1:26:50 PM PDT by catnipman (Cat Nipman: Vote Republican in 2012 and only be called racist one more time!)
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To: moose07

Thank you very much. It is NOT autobiographical. No sir. Uh uh.


37 posted on 07/31/2014 1:28:03 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Slings and Arrows
And we had a good time.

I just now "got" the (lack of) rhyme with the previous line. :-)

Bravo on your Grammy-bait there, S & A!

38 posted on 07/31/2014 1:29:23 PM PDT by WXRGina (The Founding Fathers would be shooting by now.)
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To: catnipman; Responsibility2nd

Y’know, “If You Daddy Is Webb Hubbell and Your Mama Is Lonely” actually scans pretty well.


39 posted on 07/31/2014 1:30:26 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: WXRGina

I am Mr Freakin’ Subtlety, I am. ;^) Thank you!


40 posted on 07/31/2014 1:31:43 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Well, it ain’t Beethoven, but it’s catchy!


41 posted on 07/31/2014 1:36:04 PM PDT by afraidfortherepublic
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To: Slings and Arrows

42 posted on 07/31/2014 1:38:35 PM PDT by Daffynition ("We Are Not Descended From Fearful Men")
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To: afraidfortherepublic
Well, it ain’t Beethoven, but it’s catchy!

It's not like he's going to hear about it. ;^)

43 posted on 07/31/2014 1:38:37 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Daffynition

Who sent you the publicity stills?


44 posted on 07/31/2014 1:39:08 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

That cowboy kitty needs a cigar to make him a George burns lookalike.


45 posted on 07/31/2014 1:41:04 PM PDT by rockinqsranch ((Dems, Libs, Socialists, call 'em what you will. They ALL have fairies livin' in their trees.))
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To: Slings and Arrows

I think you may have missed your calling!


46 posted on 07/31/2014 1:44:19 PM PDT by berdie
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To: Slings and Arrows
Loaded the MP3, Thank you .:)
Will be Playing that at work tomorrow. If the reaction is favourable i'll let you know.
Awaiting the cutting of your first Album...

47 posted on 07/31/2014 1:45:04 PM PDT by moose07 (the truth will out ,one day. Doggies Rock.)
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To: rockinqsranch

48 posted on 07/31/2014 1:48:09 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

I was going to post that on Facebook, but I realized you need to do that!

What a great song!


49 posted on 07/31/2014 1:48:17 PM PDT by Monkey Face (One day on Mercury lasts 1408 hours: The same length as one Monday on Earth.)
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To: Responsibility2nd

That pig got the worst of both parents.


50 posted on 07/31/2014 1:48:54 PM PDT by Monkey Face (One day on Mercury lasts 1408 hours: The same length as one Monday on Earth.)
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