Posted on 12/19/2016 6:19:00 PM PST by Captain Peter Blood
It has been a very emotional roller coaster type of week for me and my two siblings.
Last Monday night my Father was taken to the Emergency Room and was diagnosed with severe dehydration. For the last two months he has been eating less and less and has made know to all of us that he wants to die.
He is 93 and two weeks ago we found out that he has imminent heart failure. His heart is just worn out and at his age he will not be getting a heart transplant. He had bypass and heart valve replacement at age 80 and has gotten another 13 years to be with us.
His best friend from childhood died almost three weeks ago, they were close and had been since they were about two or three years old. His decline became rapid after that and now here we are in Hospice care in the hospital. I must add after his friend died he got a Strep Throat and a bad chest cold. He just has no fight left in him.
He has deteriorated to the point that he can hardly move and his skin is so sensitized you cannot touch him without him crying out in pain.
I don't know what to think or what to do. My Sister has been caring for him for the last two years while he has been living with her and since she and my brother have been with him more more than I have, I felt my Sister should make some of the day to day decisions. She has been close to him since our Mother died 36 years ago.
While all of us don't want him to suffer needlessly, I have some very serious Moral and Ethical problems with the Hospice Protocols. It is and/or can be a drawn out process. On one hand you are starving someone or you are allowing someone to be over medicated by Morphine to ease the situation and "Help" them along on the journey.
There just are no real answers and it seems everything is in a huge grey area. You wish that is was mercifully over quickly but it doesn't work that way.
I would appreciate any experiences or feedback from those of you that may have gone through this.
My Father was a very early Trump supporter and told me at least a year ago that his biggest wish was to live to vote for Donald Trump and see him win. Well he did do that.
Interesting
There just are no real answers and it seems everything is in a huge grey area. You wish that is was mercifully over quickly but it doesn’t work that way.
Morphine cuts out the pain a dying person suffers and also eventually does in the patient. With my precious mom, she had incurable cancer and was hurting badly. We put her on morphine knowing the morphine would end up aiding her death. But it was better than the great suffering she endured w/o morphine. This is the grey area you speak of.
Doctor said Hospice my Sister said no so she went to a nursing home.She was dying from cancer but her mind was sharp.I honored her wishes and when she asked for hospice she was dead in 12 hours.At that point she could no longer talk so when she would wake up she would just put her hands together in prayers and so we continued to pray.Prayers for your Family.
Prayers Up, God Bless.
Update:
My Father died in his sleep Thursday morning very early. Peacefully I hope.
We had made the decision a few days earlier to increase the dosage of his Fentanyl patch and pull the morphine shots as they were such shock to his system with his very weakened heart situation.
That seemed to smooth things out and we no longer heard his terrible moaning, which I surmised was him in such terrible pain.
Mercifully he has passed on and at 93 he had a great run and a great life. Thanks to all that shared their stories with me, it really helped me and made a difference. God Bless you all.
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