Posted on 09/30/2017 12:49:02 PM PDT by BJ1
But slowly, over the course of six years, our physical relationship dwindled to nothing. I buried it because I had no idea how to talk about it, let alone fix it. Those years were pre-internet and pre-social media; I couldn’t simply tap my problem into Google and find answers.
It’s agonising to be in a relationship full of love and lacking in sex. It’s a tragedy, in fact, or it was for me. And a sexless relationship carries a lot of shame. Just as having too much sex is taboo, so is having none.
I kept quiet. Instead, my repressed sexuality took on a life of its own, and I dreamed of sexy trysts with other men, and, being a writer, these dreams went down on paper in the form of a novel, The Tryst, published later this week.
Of course, we split up, eventually. When a couple isn’t having sex, especially a younger couple, the frustrated energy has to go somewhere. It usually ends up going outside the relationship, and it did.
He had an affair — galling, given our situation — and that was the end of things. I was 41. I ran away and regrouped. What followed was a decade of sexual seeking and exploration, a campaign of self-education.
My mission was never again to fall into this no-sex relationship trap. What had happened and why? I was determined to find out. I allowed myself to be a guinea pig, and took many bold and courageous leaps. In doing so I tried everything, and today, aged 52, I’m much more sexually confident.
(Excerpt) Read more at dailymail.co.uk ...
That's odd. It was in the first sentence of your excerpt.
But slowly, over the course of six years, our physical relationship dwindled to nothing.
She lost me there.
Maybe it’s her. Maybe she emasculated her husband.
Yes, those feminist tools living in their parents' basements, watching illicit material all day long certainly have it made.
For those cheating, it could be OOPS.
http://www.sacbee.com/news/nation-world/national/article175660326.html
http://freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/3589735/posts
No comment.
Yes, MGOTW, they are “men” who have been brainwashed by feminists into doing their bidding, i.e. renouncing their manhood. Meet one sometime, they are pathetic losers.
The use of the word, "soulmate" is a red flag. It indicates an adolescent view of relationships
.
the envy of others [snip]outgoing and attractive [snip] We looked good together. Others admired us and gave us the nod. We were bohemian, clever and talented, both writers, both extroverts. Good company to be around.
Yep. Hasn't a clue.
Also note no mention of being a family, of creating children. Marriage as a fashion accessory.
Makes for a poor excuse for a lousy marriage.
I have several women friends who are single and they seem to enjoy sex without marriage. Too many of them are attracted to entertaining but unstable men. They want to avoid being a Nurse With A Purse
A sexless marriage??? No such thing....unless my hands get cut off.
For HER it is.
When a guy looks at the whole set-up critically, they wonder “why the hell am I signing up for this to live with a roommate?”.
>>>But slowly, over the course of six years, our physical relationship dwindled to nothing.<<<
But who lost interest in whom? Did the woman lose interests, then say the marriage was bad because there wasn’t any good sex in it? That’s what it sounds like to me. But maybe I missed the real reason the sex life was bad.
Well, at least not sex with each other.
Can you blame him?
[Alvy and Annie are seeing their therapists at the same time on a split screen]
Alvy Singer's Therapist: How often do you sleep together?
Annie Hall's Therapist: Do you have sex often?
Alvy Singer: [lamenting] Hardly ever. Maybe three times a week.
Annie Hall: [annoyed] Constantly. I'd say three times a week.
“You get married because you love someone, and think they make the world a better place. You share your soul with them, and you work to be better and more purposeful people together.”
Women get married for financial resources necessary to raise children*
*or dog
Men get married for the promise of regular sex and physical intimacy in exchange for that.
This is not a secret. Religious texts even say as much.
You dont need to get married in order to be a really good friend with someone.
>>>For HER it is.
When a guy looks at the whole set-up critically, they wonder “why the hell am I signing up for this to live with a roommate?”.<<<
I get a sense that women and even some men think men should get satisfaction alone from sacrifice and watching his wife and children enjoy the fruits of his labor. That alone is a great reward, is the vibe I get.
But if that’s all u get, sit there and like it? Yes, that’s also what I am understanding many people’s views on marriage to be.
Well played.
It wasn't the 'frustrated energy' that 'ended up' going 'outside the relationship (marriage)'
I'm not lecturing here about adultery ... but my God, woman ... own it at least. Don't blame the frustrated-energy-fairy.
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