Posted on 05/18/2020 5:43:45 AM PDT by knighthawk
SACRAMENTO, CA—To prepare for the upcoming November election, Governor Gavin Newsom has ordered ballots to be sent to every cemetery in the state.
The governor of California said that ballot boxes would be sent to cemeteries across the state to ensure everyone had the right to vote, dead or alive.
"We need every single Californian to vote, living or dead," Newsom said, wagging his finger. "Without everyone doing their part, no matter their undocumented living status, we can't beat the Republicans this time around. It's science!" When he said the word "science," he lifted a test tube into the air to lend some credence to his claims.
Newsom said that people who don't want the dead to vote are discriminating against the "mortally challenged."
I assume this is a joke!
“I assume this is a joke!”
Nope. The Babylon Bee is a respected news source and much more accurate than CNN.
The Republicans need to put a box there to receive the ballots. Guarded day and night
This is the first time the dead folks in America are going to get a chance to vote for one of their own Sleepy Joe
I see I did forget to add the satire part in the title.
“mortally challenged”
YOU’RE KILLIN’ ME SMALLS !
It is, but do you think he wouldn’t really do it if he could figure out a way to?
It’s a pretty sad commentary of our society when satire hits the truth better than the news.
NO!
Don’t add the satire part.
Half the fun is trying to figure out if it’s satire or not and then realizing the Bee got you again.
I was kicked off Twitter FOREVER for saying...”the great thing about voting Democrat is you can do so early, often, in multiple cities at once, and posthumously”
It’s in my will to have my corpse registered as a democrat, as this will guarantee resurrection every election. Just think how nice being able to vote will be. Getting out of the coffin, breathing fresh air, seeing what’s new while the others just lay there rotting waiting for Jesus to return. With that advantage, no wonder democrats hate God. /s/
Pet cemeteries too! Dead pets can vote, too!
GOOD ONE!!!!!
Democratic slogan:
“Dig up the vote!”
They need an inspiring photo of a worker with a shovel in hand in a cemetery digging up the vote to show their solidarity with the workers!
The right of dead people to vote is in the 39th amendment — or it will be after Joe Biden signs it into law.
“mortally challenged”
Saw that too, right at the end ...dyin’ out here, too funny, love the BB.
The dead voters are assembled in minimally distanced groups much larger than ten. Arrest them!
Lol
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