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Daughter: Kerry Showed Love By Saving Hampster (Private Hampster Makes the Wires!)
San Jose Mercury News ^ | 7/30/04

Posted on 07/30/2004 7:25:22 AM PDT by gopwinsin04

In a prime time address to the Democratic National Convention and millions of Americans at home, Alexandta Kerry stepped to the microphone Thursday night with a mission: Help humanize her father, a man plagued with descriptives such as 'aloof' and 'distant.'

The younger Kerry told how, when they were youngsters, her sister Vanessa has insisted on taking her pet hampster on the family vacation.

While the family was on the dock waiting for a boat to pick them up, the family's golden retriever became tangled in its leash and bumped the hampster cage, knocking it into the water.

As the cage sank beneath the waves, Alexandra continued, her father--the future Democratic nominee for president--'grabbed an oar, fished the cage from the water, hunched over the soggy hampster and began to administer CPR.'

'There were some reports of mouth to mouth, but I admit it's probably a trick of memory', Alexandra said.

He was never quite right after that, but Licorice lived.'

(Excerpt) Read more at mercurynews.com ...


TOPICS: Extended News; News/Current Events; Political Humor/Cartoons; Politics/Elections; US: Massachusetts
KEYWORDS: dncconvention; hamster; kerry; lemmiwinks; lies
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What a maroon!
1 posted on 07/30/2004 7:25:25 AM PDT by gopwinsin04
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To: gopwinsin04

he probably wanted to save the hamster as a gift to his bud - richard gere!

either that or he wanted it for his NASA debut.


2 posted on 07/30/2004 7:28:53 AM PDT by camle (keep your mind open and somebody will fill it with something for you))
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To: gopwinsin04
"He was never quite right after that, but Licorice lived."

Yeah? And how about the hampster?

3 posted on 07/30/2004 7:29:11 AM PDT by theDentist ("John Kerry changes positions more often than a Nevada prostitute.")
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4 posted on 07/30/2004 7:29:41 AM PDT by gopwinsin04
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To: gopwinsin04

I saved a squirrel once, Rocky aspirated his formula and was agonal breathing and I blew into his mouth (not mouth to mouth) and tapped on his chest. I had him since he was two weeks old so I guess I saved him twice.


5 posted on 07/30/2004 7:29:53 AM PDT by mel
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To: gopwinsin04

Why wasn't the hamster up there on stage with Kerry's band of brothers?


6 posted on 07/30/2004 7:30:28 AM PDT by counterpunch (The CouNTeRPuNcH Collection - www.counterpunch.us)
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To: gopwinsin04

I've always wanted to visit New Hampster.


7 posted on 07/30/2004 7:31:47 AM PDT by TheBigB (Where -was- the bathroom on the Starship Enterprise?)
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To: gopwinsin04

How many families go on vacation 1. By being picked up on a dock; 2. with their pet hampsters and all their other pets?

We pile into the minivan and have our neighbors watch the cats.


8 posted on 07/30/2004 7:33:36 AM PDT by Cathy
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To: gopwinsin04

.....and, under heavy enemy fire, he turned the boat around and plucked me out.

9 posted on 07/30/2004 7:33:58 AM PDT by Cagey
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To: gopwinsin04

That little vignette certainly has persuaded me to vote for him.


10 posted on 07/30/2004 7:34:27 AM PDT by mountaineer (yes, I'm kidding)
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To: counterpunch

It was. It just wasn't visible..


11 posted on 07/30/2004 7:35:20 AM PDT by sheik yerbouty
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To: gopwinsin04

Hamster. A Hampster is a graduate of Hampden Sydney College. Of course, he could have given kissy action to a Hampster at a party or something.


12 posted on 07/30/2004 7:35:20 AM PDT by AppyPappy (If You're Not A Part Of The Solution, There's Good Money To Be Made In Prolonging The Problem.)
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To: gopwinsin04

"I HAVE A LOT IN COMMON WITH HAMPSTERS! DO YOU KNOW THAT I GAVE ONE CPR ONCE?"

13 posted on 07/30/2004 7:35:24 AM PDT by PBRSTREETGANG
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To: Cagey

Effin got a splinter from the oar and was awarded his fourth Purple Heart.


14 posted on 07/30/2004 7:35:45 AM PDT by mountaineer
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To: mel

Gee, I wonder if life for a hamster begins at conception. He cares more about hamsters than babies.


15 posted on 07/30/2004 7:35:56 AM PDT by berkley
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To: gopwinsin04

If Dukakis was Rocky the Flying Squirrel...

...John Kerry is Hamtaro!


16 posted on 07/30/2004 7:36:01 AM PDT by Lightfinger
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To: Cathy

Yep, Thurston Howell was getting picked up by his yacht I imagine..


17 posted on 07/30/2004 7:36:07 AM PDT by gopwinsin04
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To: gopwinsin04

I'm sure Ted Kennedy felt very uncomfortable during the telling of a water rescue story.


18 posted on 07/30/2004 7:36:29 AM PDT by NativeNewYorker (Don't blame me. I voted for Sharpton.)
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To: gopwinsin04

ROFL!

http://www.hampsterdance.com/hampsterdanceredux.html


19 posted on 07/30/2004 7:36:39 AM PDT by Velveeta
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To: mountaineer

And the golden retriever got a Silver Star.

HAMSTER DANCE!!

}:-)4


20 posted on 07/30/2004 7:37:49 AM PDT by Moose4 (Remember, change your tagline every 3 months or 3,000 posts, whichever comes first.)
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