Posted on 08/13/2004 10:30:11 AM PDT by Gopher Broke
Drug addiction is a disease that should be treated with compassion and understanding...unless the addict is a Conservative talk show host.
The United States should be subservient to the United Nations. Our highest authority is not God and the U.S. Constitution, but a collective of tinpot dictators (and their appeasers) and the U.N. charter.
Government should relax drug laws regardless of the potential for abuse, but should pass new and unConstitutional anti-gun laws because of the potential for abuse.
Calls for increased security after a terrorist attack are "political opportunism," but calls for more gun control after a criminal's spree killing is "a logical solution."
It Takes a Village" means everything you want it to mean...except creeping socialist government involvement in the nuclear family.
Disarming innocent, law-abiding citizens helps protect them from evil, lawless terrorists and other thugs.
Slowly killing an unborn innocent by tearing it apart limb from limb is good. Slowly killing an innocent disabled woman by starving her to death is good. Quickly killing terrorists, convicted murderers and rapists is BAD.
Every religion should be respected and promoted in public schools in the name of diversity, so long as that religion isn't Christianity.
The best way to support our troops is to criticize their every move. This will let them know they're thought of often.
Sexual harassment, groping and drug use are degenerate if you're the governor of California, but it's okay if you're the President of the United States.
Sex education should be required so that teens can make informed choices about sex, but gun education should be banned because it will turn those same teens into maniacal mass-murderers.
Minorities are blameless for the hatred of the racist; women are blameless for the hatred of the rapist; but America is entirely at fault for the hatred of Islamofascists.
Poverty is the cause of all terrorism...which is why the leaders of al Qaeda are typically U.S.-educated and were raised in wealth and luxury.
The Patriot Act is a horrific compromise of Constitutional rights, but anti-Second Amendment laws and Franklin Roosevelt's Presidential Order 9066 must be regarded "reasonable precautions."
We should unquestioningly honor the wishes of our age-old allies, even when said allies no longer act like our allies and have vested economic interests in propping up our enemies.
Socialized medicine is the ideal. Nevermind all those people who spend every dime they have to get to the United States so they can receive the care they can't get from their own country.
Michael Moore, Noam Chomsky and Natalie Maines are perfectly qualified to criticize our leadership, but Arnold Schwarzenegger, Charlton Heston, and Dennis Miller are just ignorant political hacks.
Bush's toppling the Saddam regime was a "diversion," but Clinton's lobbing a couple of cruise missiles at Iraq in the thick of the Lewinsky sex scandal was "sending a message."
A president who lies under oath is okay, but a president who references sixteen words from an allies' intelligence report should be dragged through the streets naked.
Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning Second Amendment rights and shopping the courts for judges sympathetic to causes that wouldn't pass in any legislature.
"The People" in the First,fourth, ninth and tenth Amendments means The People; but "the People" in the Second Amendment (ratified in 1791) means the National Guard (created by an Act of Congress in 1903).
Proven draft-dodging is irrelevant, but baseless claims of AWOL status is crucial to national security.
Threatening to boycott Dr. Laura's and Rush Limbaugh's advertisers is exercising Freedom of Speech, but threatening to boycott CBS's "The Reagans" is censorship.
Glad you like it.
I wrote it.
: )
Yeah this and its Republican counterpart have been making the rounds in email boxes around the world for a long time now. Good stuff, though.
It is actually easy for them: just shut off whatever higher brain functions you have (most of the cortex), and just go with that old reliable brainstem.
The perfect Democrat! Emotional, reflexive responses to stimuli are all that is needed!!
Hell, in many 'Rat controlled cities, you don't even need a pulse, much less brain activity.
If you are a democrat you must believe that that 1st Amendment forbids government interference in the dissemination of pornography but that buying an Ad criticizing your corrupt elected Representatives can legitimately be verboten.
I would be interested in reading the "republican counterpart"... any idea where one can find it?
Don't ferget: "AIDS is spread by lack of funding."
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