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Keyword: humor

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  • I Had A Dream: Trump Gives Alaska To Russia As Thank You Gift

    I Had A Dream (It Was Pretty Weird) Trump Gives Alaska To Russia As Thank You Gift President Elect Donald Trump’s inauguration is not until Friday, Modern Philosophers, but he is already sending thank you gifts to those who helped him win the election. And the billionaire, who really knows how to spend, is not skimping on the presents. Today, Trump surprised one of his most ardent supporters, Russian President Vladimir Putin, with the gift of Alaska. “Putin gets a bad rap because the Democrats wanted us to see him as the enemy,” Trump explained as he signed away the...
  • You guys are wonderful!

    01/17/2017 1:43:58 PM PST · by SouthWall · 14 replies
    Not for Liberals .com ^ | 1/17/17 | Doug Wall
    Last week's pool was great, thanks to you. My website, Not for Liberals has a poll every two weeks to select your favorite thought about conservative values. Last week's favorite, was: "The Second Amendment: a Matter of Fact, Not A Matter of Opinion. Please click on the vote button. Come back to the home page and select a category to see a random quote from that category. Repeat. Thank You By the way, I put a link to Free Republic on the home page, for those who have not been there before.

    01/17/2017 7:15:19 AM PST · by sevinufnine · 19 replies
    Satire Wire ^ | 12/1/2016 | Not Indicated
    After doing his part to swing the U.S. election for Donald Trump, Russian President Vladimir Putin has been enjoying his discussions with President Barack Obama. (Humor, which we need daily :>)
  • BREAKING NEWS: Russia releases photo of DONALD TRUMP with hooker in Russian hotel

    01/15/2017 6:03:08 AM PST · by Islander7 · 94 replies
    FaceBook ^ | Jan 15, 2017 | Unknown
  • Steven Crowder *LIVE* Thursday PODCAST

    01/12/2017 5:04:33 PM PST · by PROCON · 1 replies ^ | Jan. 12, 2017 | Steven Crowder
    Steven Crowder *LIVE* Thursday Podcast5PM PST/8PM EST *LIVE* Podcast Join Steven Crowder as he discusses current events using his humorous and often irreverent style.The podcast usually runs around 2 1/2 hours and is filled with his own satirical wit and interviews with a variety of guests of all political persuasions.
  • Everybody's The CEO of Nothing

    01/11/2017 2:39:03 PM PST · by cvolkay · 12 replies
    I just checked my Linkedin deal. Wowee Zowee. Never have I seen so many muey importante hombres. Holy Mackerel! Gee Whiz! Everybody on those “friends you might want” pages is either the CEO or President of something. “President and fluffer at PUREGENIUS Movies, CEO of the Timmy Tinklenuts Foundation for the advancement of multi-talented savants. Wow. Aren’t there any regular people on Linkedin? or for that matter Twitter or Facebook, you know like you and me. Jeez! Wouldn’t you like to investigate some of these companies that these people are president or CEO of? There she is, she’s Meryl Stench...
  • There is photo evidence of Trump and his "Golden Shower"

    01/11/2017 8:26:55 AM PST · by doug from upland · 59 replies
    What else would you expect Trump to have?
  • Vince McMahon to perform “Stand Back” at Trump inauguration (SATIRE)

    01/11/2017 7:36:44 AM PST · by Ciaphas Cain · 10 replies
    Kayfabe News ^ | January 10, 20-7
    United States President-Elect Donald Trump announced via Twitter this morning that his Jan. 20 inauguration will feature WWE mogul Vince McMahon performing his 1987 smash-hit “Stand Back.” Although McMahon has not performed the song live since the 37th Annual Slammy Awards in 1987, he agreed to sing it in Washington because his wife Linda, an appointee of the Trump administration, told him to. The song is ostensibly a tribute to the late Andre the Giant, but Trump tweeted that it is “really about being a winner, and believe me, I’m a winner, bigly.” According to Washington insiders, the performance will...
  • Lego Movie "Everything is Awesome" PARODY Everything is Racist

    01/07/2017 4:47:35 PM PST · by SoFloFreeper · 9 replies
    youtube ^ | 12/20/16 | Rucka Rucka Ali
    Published on Dec 20, 2016 THIS IS JOKES :D Get This Song / Album on iTunes:
  • Culture In Which All Truth Is Relative Suddenly Concerned About Fake News (Babylon Bee)

    01/03/2017 9:53:44 PM PST · by Ciaphas Cain · 10 replies
    The Babylon Bee ^ | January 3rd, 2017
    U.S.—Sources from within the United States confirmed Tuesday that American society, while typically rejecting concepts like absolute truth and objective moral standards, is suddenly showing grave concern for the rise of fabricated news stories after a reported uptick in fake news during the recent election season. One Oregon man, who rejects the idea that humanity can even be sure the universe exists in any meaningful sense, was nonetheless disturbed by the idea that websites could publish completely false information, for anyone in the world to read. “It’s just absolutely wrong, in my opinion,” said the man who doesn’t believe in...
  • Larry the Cable Guy & his Christmas Story

    01/02/2017 11:36:24 AM PST · by Bob434 · 7 replies
    Youtube ^ | Larry
    Thought you all might enjoy Larry's take on political correctness at Christmas time- Very funny stuff
  • Wild Ride – Top 2016 Campaign Moments…

    12/31/2016 3:55:53 PM PST · by HarleyLady27 · 16 replies
    The Conservative Treehouse ^ | Dec. 31, 2016 | Sundance
    Reviewing the year in 2016 politics, there are many epic campaign moments. Here’s a few of the more memorable – in no particular order: Donald Trump’s airplane had it’s own soundtrack:
  • The Wall (Donald Trump's theme song)

    12/30/2016 8:15:29 AM PST · by Mechanicos · 6 replies
    You Tube ^ | Sep 3, 2016 | El Gringo
    Published on Sep 3, 2016 El Gringo "The Wall" - (Comedy / Political Satire) "The Wall" (parody)
  • Queen Latifah’s Car Stolen from South Fulton Gas Station

    12/28/2016 9:44:50 AM PST · by Cecily · 70 replies
    Atlanta Journal Constitution ^ | December 28, 2016 | Lauren Foreman
    Police are looking for the person who hopped into Queen Latifah’s Mercedes-Benz and drove away as the actress’ associate filled up the luxury vehicle at a south Fulton County gas station. The carjacking occurred just before 9:20 p.m. Dec. 20 at a Shell gas station on Fulton Industrial Boulevard, Fulton police spokeswoman Cpl. Maureen Smith said. About that time, a white BMW pulled beside Queen Latifah’s 2015 Mercedes-Benz S63. Someone got out of the BMW and jumped into the Mercedes as the associate, Keith Sheppard, was pumping gas. Queen Latifah, who is in Lee Daniels’ new Atlanta-produced show “Star,” was...
  • My favorite funny" images of 2016

    12/25/2016 11:51:15 AM PST · by Kevin in California · 27 replies
    12-25-2016 | Me
    First of all, Merry Christmas to all. These are two of my favorites. What were the "real images that were humorous to you this 2016?
  • Dog Gets Revenge For Little Girl Kicking Him

    12/25/2016 11:24:18 AM PST · by tired&retired · 14 replies
    YouTube ^ | Vanity
    Dog Gets Revenge For Little Girl Kicking Him This video is worthy of a guaranteed Christmas laugh: I've never posted anything like this, so forgive me if it is unacceptable on FR... But it sure does lift the spirits seeing man's best friend get even!
  • Obama at the bat

    12/22/2016 12:18:53 PM PST · by Robert DeLong · 26 replies
    YouTube ^ | Mar. 4th 2010 |
    I'm sure most of you know the original poem upon which this is based, "Casey at the Bat" by Ernest Thayer - often considered one of baseball's greatest writings. The original poem: “Casey at the Bat” by Ernest Lawrence Thayer in 1888. It all started in 1885 when George Hearst decided to run for state senator in California. To self-promote his brand of politics, Hearst purchased the San Francisco Examiner. At the completion of the election, Hearst gave the newspaper to his son, William Randolph Hearst. William, who had experience editing the Harvard Lampoon while at Harvard College, took to...
  • Oh, The Horror – GOPe Republicans Fear Feedback From Trump’s Coalition…

    12/21/2016 7:17:11 PM PST · by HarleyLady27 · 23 replies
    The Conservative Treehouse ^ | Dec. 21, 2016 | Sundance
    A rather funny article today in Politico outlines a fear of Trump’s coalition amid congressional republicans. The article is sympathetic to the GOPe wing of the DC UniParty from a perspective of those nasty Trumpers, ie. “the posse“; and includes South Carolina Rep Mark Sanford as a testimonial of their fear:
  • Whining Crying Rioting Hillary Millennial Theme Song - Dana Kamide

    12/20/2016 3:11:59 PM PST · by Mechanicos · 4 replies
    YouTube ^ | Nov 11, 2016 | Dana Kamide
    Parody based on Roy Oribison's song "Crying" Featuring Hillary Clinton fans and supporters whining and crying and rioting and not accepting a fair Democratic system where President Elect Donald Trump will be our next president!! Written and sung by the Prince Of Parody (Weird Al Being King) Dana Kamide.
  • Revealed! Putin personally hacked DNC from surveillance aircraft with bear on board

    12/17/2016 8:35:36 PM PST · by Trump_vs_Evil_Witch · 47 replies
    R T News ^ | 12-17-2016 | Danielle Ryan
    Shocking revelations earlier this week as US intelligence officials confirmed with “high confidence” that Russian President Vladimir Putin was “PERSONALLY INVOLVED” in the hacking of the Democratic National Committee....The high level, anonymous and completely trustworthy sources also told a major US news agency that PUTIN HIMSELF PILOTED A specially designed RUSSIAN SPY-PLANE across the Atlantic to personally direct the still-ongoing hacking operations from the air... ...Satellite images seen by a separate anonymous NASA whistleblower are believed to show Putin in the cockpit of the spy plane alongside his co-pilot Boris, A LIFELIKE ROBOTIC BEAR which has been under secret development...
  • China to Return Drone After Understanding Trump Message in "Typo" Tweet

    12/17/2016 12:37:38 PM PST · by GonzoII · 31 replies
    KORNNEWS ^ | 17 Dec 2016 | GonzoII
    Unmamed sources in Chinna have said that they had "inside" information to suggest that Trump may have been indicating a future "un" seating of Chinese leaders including Chinese "President" Xi Jin-ping-Pong if a recently seized US Drone was not immediately returned. It is also sayed that the fact that the tweet was in the past tense Trump may have already envisioned the their own demise. The Chicoms are reportedly to have said that they didn't want to take any chances. Trump had described the taking of the drone in a widely reported "Typo" tweet as an "unpresidented act"....moor nooz at...
  • Steven Crowder *LIVE* Thursday PODCAST

    12/15/2016 5:14:58 PM PST · by PROCON · 5 replies ^ | Dec. 15, 2016 | Steven Crowder
    Steven Crowder *LIVE* Thursday Podcast5PM PST/8PM EST *LIVE* Podcast Join Steven Crowder as he discusses current events using his humorous and often irreverent style.The podcast usually runs around 2 1/2 hours and is filled with his own satirical wit and interviews with a variety of guests of all political persuasions.
  • The Twelve Days of Christmas (Election Edition)

    12/12/2016 2:42:06 PM PST · by rightwingintelligentsia · 20 replies
    December 12, 2016 | Me
    On the first day of Christmas sore losers gave to us, A whole lot of post-election fuss. On the Second Day of Christmas sore losers gave to us, Two Soros riots and A whole lot of post-election fuss. On the Third Day of Christmas sore losers gave to us, Three failed recounts, Two Soros riots and A whole lot of post-election fuss. On the Fourth Day of Christmas sore losers gave to us, Four-letter words, Three failed recounts, Two Soros riots and A whole lot of post-election fuss. On the Fifth Day of Christmas sore losers gave to us, Five...
  • Hillary Loses Again...Wisconsin for Trump; PA for Trump; Michigan for Trump...

    12/12/2016 1:58:44 PM PST · by HarleyLady27 · 30 replies
    Me | Dec 12, 2016 | HarleyLady
    It was just announced that Wisconsin votes were counted and Hillary lost again...she lost Michigan, she lost PA. Therefore, IMHO I think that all the Electoral Votes in these three States should be doubled for President Elect Donald Trump and Vice President Elect Mike Pence... What God has His Hands on, God NEVER fails...
  • Baby girl breaks out into a fit of hysterics every time her father utters the words '4p'

    12/11/2016 12:54:45 PM PST · by CorporateStepsister · 11 replies
    Mailonline ^ | 27 November 2016 | By Paddy Dinham For Mailonline
    A baby's infectious laugh - and the unusual phrase that triggers it - have been shared online by her mother and father. The British parents, whose location is not made clear, are sat on their living room for with the child. She has her hand in her mouth and slightly worried expression on her face. Until her mother utters the words '4p', that is.
  • A Post Office Christmas Story !!

    12/11/2016 9:17:57 AM PST · by CGASMIA68 · 3 replies
    an Email
    A Post Office Christmas Story There was a man who worked for the Post Office whose job was to process all the mail that had illegible addresses. One day, a letter came addressed in a shaky handwriting to God with no actual address. He thought he should open it to see what it was about. The letter read: Dear God, I am an 83 year old widow, living on a very small pension. Yesterday someone stole my purse. It had $100 in it, which was all the money I had until my next pension payment. Next Sunday is Christmas, and...
  • Leaked Phone Calls Between Donald Trump and Barack Obama - Conan O’Brien, TBS

    12/09/2016 10:25:27 AM PST · by EveningStar · 39 replies
    YouTube - Multiple links in body of thread | November 30, December 2, 5, 7, 2016 | Uploaded by Team Coco
    EXCLUSIVE Leaked Audio Of Obama & Trump's Phone Calls - CONAN on TBS - November 30, 2016 Even More Leaked Phone Calls Between Donald Trump & Barack Obama - CONAN on TBS - December 2, 2016 Still More Leaked Trump & Obama Phone Calls - CONAN on TBS - December 5, 2016 Donald Trump Keeps Calling Barack Obama - CONAN on TBS - December 7, 2016
  • Steven Crowder *LIVE* Thursday PODCAST (Michelle Malkin, Gavin McInnes)

    12/08/2016 5:07:40 PM PST · by PROCON · 9 replies ^ | Dec. 8, 2016 | Steven Crowder
    Steven Crowder *LIVE* Thursday Podcast5PM PST/8PM EST *LIVE* Podcast Join Steven Crowder as he discusses current events using his humorous and often irreverent style.The podcast usually runs around 2 1/2 hours and is filled with his own satirical wit and interviews with a variety of guests of all political persuasions.
  • 65 Million Americans Should Threaten to Not Pay Taxes Until democracy is restored

    12/06/2016 6:26:00 PM PST · by 2ndDivisionVet · 86 replies
    Time Magazine ^ | December 6, 2016 | Mark Weston
    The approximately 65 million Democrats who voted for Hillary Clinton should pledge that in the future if a Republican wins the presidency with fewer votes than a Democrat for the third time in our era, we won’t pay taxes to the federal government. No taxation without representation! Twice in the past 16 years, a Republican candidate who finished second in the popular vote has won the presidency. This year, Donald Trump won the electoral vote with about 46% of the popular vote, while Hillary Clinton received about 48%. If the parties stay this evenly divided, another electoral mishap is more...
  • Trump speaks with "president" of Taiwan, harasses her sexually

    12/03/2016 9:53:13 AM PST · by DanMiller · 20 replies
    Dan Miller's Blog ^ | December 3, 2016 | Dan Miller
    This is a guest post by a well-known political commentator, the father of Pajama Boy. He is a true "Obama patriot," whose views should matter little after mid-day on January 20th. Here are the thoughts of President Reject Obama:President Elect Donald Trump violated all known rules of common decency by accepting a telephone call from Taiwanese "President" Tsai Ing-wen without My permission. Indeed, Ms. Tsai did as well by placing the call without My permission. Obviously, I would not have granted permission because it was just a trick, intended to embarrass Me and My fundamentally transformed country. Chinese Foreign Minister Wang Yi said Saturday the...
  • Weather manipulation.

    12/03/2016 8:51:21 AM PST · by Tigen · 37 replies
    Wunderground. Com ^ | Weather Underground
    Look at weather map for anomaly coming from Ft Smith AR
  • How to Rebuild the Republican Party

    Bravo for the forward-looking team at Commentary. Unburdened by illusion that Donald Trump can or will “turn this thing around,” they have proceeded straightaway to the next important conversation: What comes next for America’s battered Republican Party? Noah Rothman writes: “Reunification and a recapitulation of something resembling a national governing coalition must be the foremost priority.” That’s clearly true! How to do it? Rothman’s answer is to try to reconstitute conservatism as it used to be, refined by the famous “autopsy” of 2013. The problem is that pro-Trump Republicans may not agree that Trumpism failed. They may not be amenable...
  • Intellectual Frog Legs – Victory Edition…

    12/02/2016 6:54:27 AM PST · by HarleyLady27 · 8 replies
    The Conservative Treehouse ^ | Dec 2, 2016 | Sundance
    Joe Dan Gorman has produced another installment of Intellectual Froglegs with a great summary of the 2016 Trump victory.
  • Steven Crowder *LIVE* Thursday PODCAST

    12/01/2016 5:15:24 PM PST · by PROCON · 1 replies ^ | Dec. 1, 2016 | Steven Crowder
    Steven Crowder *LIVE* Thursday Podcast5PM PST/8PM EST *LIVE* Podcast Join Steven Crowder as he discusses current events using his humorous and often irreverent style.The podcast usually runs around 2 1/2 hours and is filled with his own satirical wit and interviews with a variety of guests of all political persuasions.
  • The Secretary of State Kerfuffle. Obvious Choice Only one: (Vanity)

    11/27/2016 7:37:06 PM PST · by LesbianThespianGymnasticMidget · 52 replies
    KellyAnne Conway. Loyal. Smart. Articulate. Worldly. Wise. Succinct. Attractive. Winner. Deplorable. Come on Trump Team. See It.
  • WHAT? JILL STEIN SLAMS HILLARY For Joining Her Hillary-Supported #Recount2016

    11/27/2016 8:00:24 AM PST · by HarleyLady27 · 95 replies
    Gateway Pundit/American Outlook ^ | Nov 26, 2016 | Jim Hoft/ Tom Franklin
    hillary-jillstein Jill Stein’s recount is slipping into the bizarre. It’s Liberals’ last chance to overthrow Trump’s historic win. So all the crazies are joining forces. One problem: The crazy Liberals don’t seem to like each other. The Gateway Pundit reported that Hillary people are joining the recount:
  • Who Likes The Taste Of Crow?? Hahaha!! Funny...

    11/26/2016 12:51:31 PM PST · by GilGil · 153 replies
    Youtube ^ | 11/26/2016 | Frisco JD
    "Donald Trump Will Never Be President Of The United States" ...
  • The Ten Commandments According to Francis

    11/25/2016 5:10:06 PM PST · by ebb tide · 4 replies
    Mahhound's Paradise ^ | November 25, 2016 | Manhound
    I have obtained a draft version. Sources tell me that the New Decalogue will be promulgated soon after the four cardinals are beheaded. 1. I am the LORD your Pope: you shall not heed strange Popes before me. 2. You shall not take Yes or No questions to me. 3. Remember the late 1960's and keep them holy. 4. Please report dissident relatives to the proper authorities. 5. You shall not discard that which can be re-used. 6. Life is complicated. 7. Let it go. 8 You shall bear false witness against your neighbor if it favors the progressive cause....
  • Whale Makes Rare Appearance in New York Harbor by the Statue of Liberty

    11/18/2016 7:47:51 AM PST · by fungoking · 13 replies
    ABC news ^ | 11/17/16 | AVIANNE TAN
    Whale, whale, whale. What do we have here! A whale made a rare appearance in New York Harbor near the Statue of Liberty this morning, according to the U.S. Coast Guard. Coast Guard Petty Officer Frank Iannazzo-Simmons said the whale was spotted around 8:00 a.m., reported ABC-owned station WABC in New York. Iannazzo-Simmons added that the Coast Guard put out a travel advisory to boaters cautioning them to avoid contact with the whale. The whale was likely a humpback, according to Howard Rosenbaum, ocean giants director at the Wildlife Conservation Society based in New York City. Rosenbaum told WABC that...
  • Steven Crowder *LIVE* Thursday PODCAST

    11/17/2016 5:11:01 PM PST · by PROCON · 10 replies ^ | Nov. 17, 2016 | Steven Crowder
    Steven Crowder *LIVE* Thursday Podcast5PM PDT/8PM EDT *LIVE* Podcast Join Steven Crowder as he discusses current events using his humorous and often irreverent style.The podcast usually runs around 2 1/2 hours and is filled with his own satirical wit and interviews with a variety of guests of all political persuasions.
  • Time for some laughter from Tim Conway & Carol Burnett

    11/17/2016 7:42:52 AM PST · by sodpoodle · 20 replies
    youtube ^ | // | self
  • News Bulletin Just In From CBC (Canadian Broadcasting Company) Headquarters in Ottawa.

    11/15/2016 10:08:30 AM PST · by Strac6 · 39 replies
    Satire | Walter Chruchtight
    This just in!!!! The flood of Trump-fearing American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada has intensified in the past week. The victory of Republican presidential candidate D. Trump over his establishment foe H. Clinton is prompting an exodus among left-leaning Americans who fear they'll soon be required to obtain gainful employment, pay taxes and live according to the Constitution if they remain. Canadian border residents say it's not uncommon to see dozens of sociology professors, liberal arts majors, global-warming activists, and "green" energy proponents crossing their fields at night. "I went out to milk the cows the other day,...
  • When People Laughed At The Idea Of Trump Actually Being Elected President! [Compilation]

    11/14/2016 3:41:36 PM PST · by all the best · 30 replies
  • MSNBC Realise They are Propagandists

    11/12/2016 7:32:53 AM PST · by moonhawk · 67 replies
    Get red-pilled, my dudes.
  • If Benjamin Netanyahu Collaborated With Barry White, This Is What It Would Sound Like

    11/11/2016 8:06:01 PM PST · by JustaCowgirl · 4 replies
    Chicks on the Right ^ | November 10, 2016 | Mockarena COTR
    If Benjamin Netanyahu collaborated with Barry White to send his congratulations to President-elect Trump
  • Canadian Militia Vows To Protect Borders From Illegal Americans

    11/10/2016 8:42:38 PM PST · by PROCON · 42 replies ^ | Nov. 11, 2016
    Huntington | A Canadian militia seems to have taken Donald Trump’s victory very seriously fearing hundreds of thousands of illegal Americans could try to cross the border. The Permanent Active Militia (PAM) is a country-wide association which is believed to have approximately 4,500 members across the country with its headquarters in Huntington, Ontario, near the Minnesota border. “ This ain’t no Mexico border. Illegals will face snow and deadly cold temperatures, not withstanding dangerous predator attacks from bears, cougars and wolves. If you’re an American crossing the border illegally, your chances of survival are pretty slim ” – John...
  • Trump Offers Hillary Clinton A Key Role In His New Administration, (Satire)

    11/10/2016 2:41:16 PM PST · by Swordmaker · 7 replies
    Western Sentinel ^ | November 9, 2016 | by WS Staff Editor
    BREAKING: Trump Offers Hillary Clinton A Key Role In His New Administration, GOP ECSTATIC Over Appointment In an unprecedented move, newly elected GOP President Donald J. Trump has extended an olive branch to his Democratic opponent Hillary Clinton. After a brief discussion by phone this afternoon Trump said that he and Hillary had agreed that she would join his administration in January in a very important capacity. On September 10, 2017, Mrs. Clinton and her administrative assistants Huma Abedin-Weiner-Danger and John Podesta will be sent to the Middle East to fill a vacancy left by the Obama Administration. Clinton will...
  • Lion laughing Hysterically

    11/10/2016 9:03:44 AM PST · by HarleyLady27 · 12 replies
    youtube ^ | Nov 10, 2016 | HarleyLady27
    This is a video of a lion laughing, I have always thought of Trump as being a makes you laugh...
  • Paging Vice President Joe Biden

    11/09/2016 7:25:42 AM PST · by Robert DeLong · 10 replies
    Vanity | 11/09/2016 | Robert DeLong
    President elect Donald J. Trump will be in the Rose Garden on Thursday if you would like to follow through with your threat of whipping his behind.
  • (vanity) Long past time we substituted "Journalist" for "Lawyer" in jokes

    11/09/2016 2:57:27 AM PST · by CardCarryingMember.VastRightWC · 12 replies
    Self | 11/9/2016 | Vanity
    Hey guys, it's time we give the lawyers a break ... at least for a few hours anyway. These past few months have decisively proven that lawyers are NOT the bottom feeders we thought they were. How can they even REACH the bottom when the journalists have crowded them out from that zone? Some examples..... Q: What's black & brown and looks good on a journalist? A: A Doberman Q: How do you know when a journalist is lying? A: His lips are moving. Q: What do you call 5000 journalists at the bottom of the sea? A: A good...