when they play with spitballs... 
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Posted on 09/04/2004 9:07:09 AM PDT by NotchJohnson
John Kerry attended last night's Yankees-Red Sox game at Fenway Park. He wasn't scheduled to be there, but at the last minute decided to attend the game with his wife, billionaire Teresa Heinz Kerry. In honor of Sen. Kerry, the Red Sox asked him to throw out the first pitch, which he did, a perfect strike... if only he were bowling. The fans promptly booed him.
''I love the Red Sox. The idea of missing a Yankees-Red Sox series right before a convention week was not acceptable, so we changed the policy. I'm going to go have some fun, " said Kerry.
The partisan crowd at Fenway Park was obviously expecting more from the potential commander-in-chief. After all, our current president throws perfect strikes (with movement) off the mound. Perhaps they were booing him for his 'stinker' ball, or perhaps they were booing him for his embarrassing knowledge of the Boston Red Sox -- his home town team.
Peter Gammons wrote the following in his July 20 column on ESPN...
John Kerry last week professed to be a big fan of "Manny Ortez," then re-emphasized the phoofery by correcting it to "David Ortez." No, that was Dave (Baby) Cortez and "The Happy Organ." A few years back Kerry went on a Boston station with Eddie Andelman and said "my favorite Red Sox player of all time is The Walking Man, Eddie Yost," who never played for the Red Sox.
For those of you who aren't baseball fans, Kerry confused Red Sox first baseman David Ortiz with Red Sox left fielder Manny Ramirez (yeah, he never misses a Yankees-Red Sox series).
Gammons anecdote about Eddie Yost prompted this observation from Slate.com...
Eddie Yost was a mediocre hitter who became an All-Star by letting the opposing pitcher screw up: he often led the league in walks, was near the top in on-base percentage. Boring, seemingly passive, reliable, effective.
Right. Maybe Kerry's being candid, not phony. What does it say that he admires a player who got on base not by hitting but by walking? Hmmm. a) Kerry survives in Vietnam in large part by making his boat a small target. b) His standard political technique is to avoid clear, assailable stands. c) His 2004 strategy is remarkably passive, dependent almost entirely on voter satisfaction with the incumbent.
Seemingly, he wants to get to the White House Yost-style, by a base on balls! The obvious question: Is someone who attains the presidency by getting a walk in any position to achieve much, either domestically or internationally? The answer isn't necessarily no. (Gerald Ford wasn't wholly ineffective.) And note how Kerry's passive, Yostish approach dovetails with the "return to normalcy" theme suggested by Peggy Noonan. If you want a break from Bush--if you think he's been swinging a bit too hard for the fences--an Eddie Yost might seem like just the man to send to the plate.
Too funny!
But his trip to Cambodia is seared - seared - in his memory...no, wait...I mean...that is...er, my staff will get back to you on these issues later
Anyone hear the excerpt from the Kerry Midnight Desperation Rally where Kerry said "Something very important in our world happened last night" (the
night of W's acceptance speech, of course)"...the
Red Sox are now within 2 1/2 games of the Yankees!"
A) Wrong. They were 3 1/2 games back. After last
night's win and the Yankees' loss to Balt., they
are indeed 2 1/2 back, but not on Thu night!
B) He giggled and sounded like he'd "gotten a bad
ice cube". Been taking a swig of Ted's Chivas
Regal, senator? :)
when they play with spitballs...
Ted Kennedy has said his favorite players are "Mike
McGwire and Sammy Sooser" (hic!)
As MAD magazine once said of a politician (Carter, I
think), "has no balls and two strikes against him..."
That depends. How many outs were there? Who's up next? What inning is it, what's the score? This requires a nuanced answer that you won't be getting from that cowboy down in Crawford.
Too funny. I hope we are soon going to be in a position to take pity upon poor John Kerry.
Kerry - NO runs, NO hits, NO BALLS! ALL ERRORS!
For those of you who aren't baseball fans, Kerry confused Red Sox first baseman David Ortiz with Red Sox left fielder Manny Ramirez (yeah, he never misses a Yankees-Red Sox series).
Woah! the man is sKerry, for sure.
Reminds me of the campaign trail gaffe by Howard Dean. Dean bragged of being a big fan of the Bible, after he found out [from a recent poll] that the American people like to hear of their candidate's view of God.
A reporter then asked him who his favoite New Testament author was. Dean said, "Job".
Doah!!!
"I've heard Eric Clapner, ... I think it was a wonderful thing that Eric Clapner the musician did...So I think that's the wonderful part about it, but listen - I like Eric Clapner!" listen
"I'm going to go have some fun," said Kerry.
He needed a break from doing all that wind surfing.
As if that weren't bad enough -- that night, he pre-empted the National Guardsman who was supposed to throw out the first pitch. Can't have the 'little people' get in the way of a good photo-op.
He then blamed the guardman for his pathetic pitch because he wanted to 'go easy' on the nervous soldier. (It's never his fault, dontcha know.)
Sounds like the encounter that AlGore had with a female singer (I forget who) during the 2000 campaign. When he told her he was a big fan of hers, she asked him to name one of her songs. He couldn't. Some 'fan'! :=)
This from somebody who was there:The soldier seated next to him at the start of the game was escorted out and sent to the next to last row in the grandstand after the second inning.
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