ACLU Sues to Remove 'Primordial Soup' Displays

Scrappleface.com ^ | 12/22/2004 | Scott Ott

[StoneGiant]

source: scrappleface.com



ACLU Sues to Remove 'Primordial Soup' Displays

by Scott Ott

(2004-12-22) -- The American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) today filed a class-action suit on behalf of monotheists seeking the removal of wetlands from government-owned property because they visually portray the 'primordial soup' where some believe life began and from which humanity evolved.

"These swamps represent a government endorsement of philosophical naturalism--a faith-based belief system tantamount to religion," said an unnamed ACLU spokesman. "Christians, Jews, Muslims and other monotheists shouldn't be forced to see such things, nor to fund them with their tax dollars."

The lawsuit claims that philosophical naturalism is a de facto religion that includes a dramatic, if fanciful, story of the origins of humanity which scholars call creation ex nihilo via nihilo (out of nothing by means of nothing).

"For many years, the government has been protecting and funding the restoration of these symbols of all that naturalists hold dear," said the source. "This violation of the establishment clause of the first amendment has extended to the government-controlled schools where this religion is taught as fact, rather than faith. The situational morality of naturalism has been forced on America's children using tax dollars. This is, in effect, an involuntary tithe to the church of naturalistic philosophy."

The ACLU does not oppose primordial soup displays on private property, just those funded with taxpayer dollars in national parks and on other government-controlled land.

The lawsuit seeks the destruction of all government-owned wetlands, and a refund to taxpayers of all school tax dollars paid during the past 50 years.

[rocksblues]

I'm sure I have this wrong.

The lawsuit seeks the destruction of all government-owned wetlands,

Drain the swamps?

[Fierce Allegiance]

I love Scrappleface in the morning, before the first coffee wakes the brain!

[JOE43270]

I don't think the aclu even knows what it's suing about anymore. They just keep filing lawsuits. Their mission comes from Joe Stalin. Even if they file stupid lawsuits they take up everyones time and keep us from what's important.

[Lonesome in Massachussets]

Joe, the keyword here is "satire".

[momincombatboots]

Yeah, shoulda put a coffee first alert on this one. My arguments of evolution as a religious belief imposed on my kids at school have fallen on deaf ears. It takes much more faith and a big smoozing of facts to make the theory work. Much simpler to open Genesis.
As much as it pains me to admit it, I agree with the ACLU on this one. However, I am now more opposed than ever to them, this strategy by the enemy is a blatant attempt to assauge Christians and keep those tax dollars flowing.
Sounds like a last stand tactic for them- while they regroup and rearm. I like the desparation...

[BibChr]

< chuckle >

[In veno, veritas]

I missed the source the first time. I knew it couldn't be true.

[governsleastgovernsbest]

I tried a can of the chunky-style Primordial Soup after I saw Donovan McNabb's mother serving it in a TV commercial. Hmm-mm good!

[StoneGiant]

I tried a can of the chunky-style Primordial Soup after I saw Donovan McNabb's mother serving it in a TV commercial. Hmm-mm good!

[commonguymd]

"excellent" in the immortal words of Mr. Burns on the Simpsons. We could build industrial parks - these won't offend anyone. I love satire.

[Heartlander]

Humor ping...

[Fintan]

 

 

[Dataman]

Scrappleface is running low on material?

[showme_the_Glory]

Thank god for the primordial soup that contains my decoys which entice certain evolved creatures to be lured into becoming one with my smoker. (duck jerky)

[TChris]

HEhehe... If only... :-)

[AndrewC]

Guess they can't sell this brand then.