Cops say suspect offers cheesy bribe (guy offers McD's cheeseburgers as a bribe to cop)

keynoter.com ^ | 2/23/05 | Kevin Wadlow

[lowbridge]

Cops say suspect offers cheesy bribe

Trying to burger his way out of trouble only led to more legal woes for a Marathon man Friday, sheriff's deputies said.

Steven T. Denton, 32, was charged with a felony count of attempting to bribe a law officer after he allegedly offered to spring for McDonald's cheeseburgers in exchange for his release.

Denton was taken into custody following a fracas at the Dockside Lounge on Sombrero Boulevard.

"Denton told me that if I would drive him to McDonald's, he would buy me two cheeseburgers if I let him go and did not take him to jail," reported Deputy Mark Eastty of the Monroe County Sheriff's Office.

The officer added, "He also stated that if I did not like cheeseburgers, he would buy me some chicken instead."

The deputy declined, and added a count of bribery to charges against Denton.

The incident began when Dockside staff told Denton that he would not be served any more liquor. The suspect reportedly became irate.

When another patron, David Snoad, attempted to call lawmen, Denton reportedly threatened him, knocked a cell phone from Snoad's hand and struck Snoad several times.

Other customers separated the men, and Denton fled on foot.

Easttly found him hiding in bushes near the scene. Denton admitted having been in a fight at the bar, the deputy said.

Denton faces charges of battery, a misdemeanor, and felony counts of bribery and threatening a witness.

[lowbridge]

He ought to have tried donuts, or better still, McDonalds fries. No one can resist McDonalds fries.

[Behind Liberal Lines]

For some reason, I wish I had a picture of "Chief Wiggam" from the Simpsons to post right now.

[NonValueAdded]

LOL Maybe establishing his insanity defense? Consider, though, that the battery on Snoad is only a misdemeanor while the cop filed felony charges for the offer of a couple of items off the dollar menu. There is something upside down about that.

[SirLurkedalot]

They're easier to stuff behind your DL, too.

[Wolfie]

Drunk and stupid is a classic combination.

[Guillermo]

[tiredoflaundry]

I hope the "food police" don't hear about this because they will want him charged with attempted murder! McDonald's cheeseburgers are a deadly weapon! :-)

[kingattax]

[zek157]

He should have tried dunkin donuts.

[Jaysun]

"Denton told me that if I would drive him to McDonald's, he would buy me two cheeseburgers if I let him go and did not take him to jail,"

I've been berated by homeless squeegee guys who have a better line of reasoning. He's obviously a liberal.

[SilentServiceCPOWife]

No one can resist McDonalds fries.

I had some yesterday and they were terrible. I haven't had any in years and I was looking forward to it, but they were incredibly dry and tasteless.

[xp38]

In other albeit Fake news...Mayor McCheese faces recall http://www.shtick.org/FakeNews/news83.htm

[Conspiracy Guy]

A couple of Big Macs maybe but a cheeseburger? Get real dude.

[monday]

" Consider, though, that the battery on Snoad is only a misdemeanor while the cop filed felony charges for the offer of a couple of items off the dollar menu."

The legal system is the wrong place to look for logic. It was designed by lawyers and politicians.

[sd-joe]

>> The incident began when Dockside staff told Denton that he would not be served any more liquor. <<

Sooo many "incidents" start that way.

[CSM]

How about a fish sandwich?

[Robert DeLong]

He was already charged with a felony for threatening a witness, before the bribery charge got tacked on. So he was not just charged with only the misdemeanor before the bribery charge was added on. The guy mucked up and then mucked up some more.

[tje]

That's a fishwish.. Just so you know...

[Freebird Forever]

He ought to have tried donuts

The best lines are always taken before I get to a thread.

[najida]

Were they still warm?

I mean, if they are still warm, it could've been a real tempation.

Or so I've heard.