Parents miss Mass, kids get ax

NY Daily News ^ | 06.27.05 | NANCY DILLON

[Coleus]

Parents miss Mass, kids get ax

The pastor of a Staten Island Catholic church is playing holy hardball - kicking hundreds of kids out of religious ed classes because their families aren't showing up at Mass.

The Rev. Michael Cichon, pastor of St. Joseph/St. Thomas in Pleasant Plains, used each family's bar-coded donation envelope to track attendance.

He's tossed about 300 kids from classes and told them not to reapply until next April.

Without the classes, children cannot receive the sacraments, meaning some youngsters who thought they'd be making their First Communion next year will have to wait.

The suspensions, legal under church doctrine, were a shock to many parents with kids enrolled in the 1,400-child program, which caters to kids who don't attend Catholic schools.

"It's hurtful," said Joseph LoPizzo, 38, whose 6-year-old son was booted. "I've been a parishioner at that church for 23 years - longer than he's been the reverend."

LoPizzo said he paid the $150 for his son's Thursday afternoon classes last year, but his father-in-law's illness hampered the family's church attendance.

"I've just never heard of a church kicking you out," complained Lisa Nicol, 36, who got a letter saying her 7-year-old twin daughters had been barred from classes. "They should be more welcoming and sensitive."

The pastor said he suspended kids from the 2005-2006 after-school program because Mass is an "essential" component of the Catholic faith.

The affected families were attending church less than once a month, he said.

Cichon insisted that the move has nothing to do with the lack of a donation.

"There are many families who put absolutely nothing inside the envelopes they submit," he said.

Originally published on June 27, 2005

[Coleus]

Years ago, most parents and their children attended mass every Sunday, no excuses.

[My2Cents]

Should this be considered "mass expulsion"? :)

[wideawake]

I'm conflicted on this one.

The parents need to be called out on their disregard of the Third Commandment, but at the same time the kids need to be instructed no matter how slack their folks are.

It's a tough call.

[AppyPappy]

but his father-in-law's illness hampered the family's church attendance

That works for Protestants but not Catholics. Mass happens all the time.

[vrwcagent0498]

What do they do to the non-Catholic pupils?

In our school, the non-Catholic and non-regularly attending (Mass) families pay extra tuition every month. (a substantial amount, imo)

Expelling the kids is going too far, I think.

[FoxInSocks]

used each family's bar-coded donation envelope to track attendance.

Technically, that just means they didn't turn in an envelope. They could have been there.

I think this is utterly ridiculous, anyway. What are they going to do, use bouncers to keep out the unwashed?

[TheBigB]

Years ago, most parents and their children attended mass every Sunday, no excuses.

We never attended mass.

Of course, we weren't Catholic, either.

[redhead]

Exactly. I'm all for this. (Extenuating circumstances may apply...) But there's no sense in sending a kid to a Catholic school/CCD program if the parents don't want to take the time to set the kind of example the kids should follow. Go to Mass, or send your kids elsewhere. As a private entity, the parish school has the right to expect the parents to fulfil the requirements. One hour a week...hmmm...decisions, decisions.

[FeeinTennessee]

Don't punish the kids because the parents cannot show.

[Malacoda]

I'm failing to see the problem here. Attending Mass is an important part of religious formation and the process of experiencing the Sacraments.

In our parish, they use the envelopes to track attendance, and those who don't make enough Masses lose the tuition discount at the local parochial school.

[frogjerk]

"It's hurtful," said Joseph LoPizzo, 38, whose 6-year-old son was booted. "I've been a parishioner at that church for 23 years - longer than he's been the reverend."

LoPizzo said he paid the $150 for his son's Thursday afternoon classes last year, but his father-in-law's illness hampered the family's church attendance.

I'm sure everyone can come up with one excuse not to attend Mass but there is always time in one's life to fit God in. Where there is a will there is a way. To Catholics, attending Mass should be of the utmost importance.

[redhead]

"There are many Churches (including mine) which would be happy to teach Sunday School to any and all, not only those who donate."

It looks more like a case of the parents not going to Mass than not donating. Obviously, they have paid the tuition or their kids wouldn't be in the school.

[FeeinTennessee]

There are many Churches (including mine) which would be happy to teach Sunday School to any and all, not only those who donate. It's biased reporting like this that gives us Christians a bad name.




I teach Sunday School volunatarily, kids and adults come when they can. We don't force them to. Or kick them out if the parents don't show up for church. I don't understand the reasoning behind that.

[tfecw]

I'm pretty conflicted on this one too.

As a side note (and minor digression into half silliness half seriousness) isn't it the God Parents that are charged with making sure the children grow up to be good catholics?

[mountn man]

It's biased reporting like this that gives us Christians a bad name.

Wow. Imagine that. Biased reporting, giving christians a bad name.

If I ever saw good reports from the MSM on anything christian, I'd look for something amiss, or wait for the other shoe to drop.

[wmichgrad]

It shouldn't be a tough call. You don't punish the children for the mistakes of their parents.

[frogjerk]

In our school, the non-Catholic and non-regularly attending (Mass) families pay extra tuition every month. (a substantial amount, imo)

This is regarding religious education of Catholics. Why would non-Catholics be affected by this?

[TalonDJ]

"I've been a parishioner at that church for 23 years - longer than he's been the reverend."

You got to love that quote. I wonder how he would stack up in a 'how many masses have you attended' contest with the reverend. Hah!

[Eepsy]

As far as I can see, this is only about CCD classes, and CCD isn't going to do your kid a lick of good if you can't get them to Mass at least once a month. Good on the priest.

[B Knotts]

FYI, this is not about a Catholic school.

This is about religious education (what used to be called CCD or Catechism). They are classes to teach the Faith to children.

The classes, or some subset of them, are required for the children to receive First Communion and Confirmation.

[Heartland Mom]

What happens if the family was on vacation and attended Mass where they were at that time? Or if they were attending Mass at another church nearby? Or if they didn't remember to put an envelope in? What's next - a sign in sheet? What is to stop someone from putting an entire month of envelopes in on one visit(and thus paying their way out of attendance) or having someone else put their envelope in for them? This is ridiculous.

[USAFJeeper]

Its BS. I am Catholic and I purposely don't use the envelopes they send me. Partly paranoia about being tracked, and partly cause I went into a non Catholic church one time and on the bulletin board by church they had a list of people not meeting tithes posted there. While I had not seen it at a Catholic church, well what they don't see cannot be tracked.

I put cash in, when I attend. And no its not every week. This pastor is wrong imo, and my kids and money would find a new home.

[LWalk18]

I'm not Catholic, but I can see the pastor's point. If the parents won't attend mass, then religious education of the children is a waste of time because they won't be attending either. Even when they become old enough to go on their own they will be less likely to attend more than occasionally. Parents must set an example in their children's spiritual lives.

[Malacoda]

(In our town, a lot of non-Catholics send their kids to Catholic school because the local public schools are hotbeds of liberal crap. They took a field trip to "PrideFest" downtown.)

[tfecw]

Well to extend that I'm not sure why you can't just leave someone home to take care of the sick and have someone else take the family to mass as well as become -Sorry for my lack of terminology here- one of the people who get qualified to bring communion to the sick.

[frogjerk]

As a side note (and minor digression into half silliness half seriousness) isn't it the God Parents that are charged with making sure the children grow up to be good catholics?

No. During the baptism the Parents are specifically charged with being the teachers of their children in the Catholic Faith. If the parents are not practicing Catholics they cannot set an example to their children.

[Palladin]

Disgusting--visiting the sins and omissions of the parents upon the innocent children.

This is all about money, anyway. Since the priest sex scandals began, revenues have been decreasing every week in most parishes.

These strong-arm tactics will only result in the families leaving the parish of this tyrant and joining another parish, or leaving the RCC altogether. There are many Evangelical churches waiting to welcome these people with open arms--and no hand in their pocket.

Some priests just don't get it.

[vrwcagent0498]

The issue is the (Catholic) kids being expelled from school entirely because of their parents' non-attendance at Mass on Sundays.

Do they only allow Catholic children to be enrolled?

Maybe it's different down South where I live, because there has always been at least 10% non-Catholic students in mine and my son's Catholic schools

[frogjerk]

Well to extend that I'm not sure why you can't just leave someone home to take care of the sick and have someone else take the family to mass as well as become -Sorry for my lack of terminology here- one of the people who get qualified to bring communion to the sick.

Exactly. Call the rectory and a Eucharistic minister come to your house. They will never refuse you. I think they are called "Extraordinary Ministers".

[Tax-chick]

Our Sister talked about this problem earlier this year. She said that if the Church gives the Sacraments to children whose parents are non-practicing, they're imposing an obligation on the child that he or she is not capable of fulfilling without support from the parents, and that's not fair to the child.

[vrwcagent0498]

Exactly.

A lot of people send their children to Catholic schools to avoid having to send their children to (God-less, amoral) public schools.

[mountn man]

isn't it the God Parents that are charged with making sure the children grow up to be good catholics?

I'm not catholic, but I play one on tv. Whoops, I mean I'm not catholic, but I am Godfather to my buddy's youngest son. The way I've understood it, I'm to make sure that the parents are doing their job raising their kids in the ways of the church. If anything ever happens to the parents, then I'm to personally take charge of my Godsons religious up bringing.

[TwoDogs]

Bravo

Bet he got the parents attention. Furthermore, I'll bet they will start attending more and paying more attention in due course.

[r9etb]

Cichon is a jackass. Satan himself couldn't have come up with a better plan for chasing people away from the church.

[Thinkin' Gal]

The Rev. Michael Cichon, pastor of St. Joseph/St. Thomas in Pleasant Plains, used each family's bar-coded donation envelope to track attendance.

[BobCNY]

I teach 9th grade religious education at my Catholic parish. Most my students do not go to weekly Sunday Mass because their parents do not bring them.

I talk about the readings from Scripture from Sunday Mass or the sermon and I get blank stares.

I agree with the priest on this one.

If the parents can not take their children to Mass to hear Scripture read and hear the sermon, and expect to "pushed through the system" like a public school to obtain the Sacraments, they should think again.

That lack of parental involvement in Catholic education and participating in the Sacraments have already turned out a few generations of poorly formed Catholics.

[frogjerk]

The pastor of a Staten Island Catholic church is playing holy hardball - kicking hundreds of kids out of religious ed classes because their families aren't showing up at Mass..

This is regarding CCD not regular school.

[Coleus]

Should this be considered "mass expulsion"? :) >>

You bet.

[B Knotts]

We Catholics believe that we have an obligation to assist at Mass every Sunday.

This is an important part of the Faith that they are learning in these classes. So, if the parents are rarely showing up for Mass, it doesn't really help reinforce what the kids are learning.

That said, I'm not in a position to say whether or not this pastor made the right call.

[vrwcagent0498]

Okay, my bad.

Then, I agree with the priest.

When my mom was growing up, there had to be a very good reason why ANY Catholic child was not in a Catholic school. If you couldn't afford it, the Church found a way.

[xsmommy]

you aren't getting it. this is NOT about attendance at a Catholic elementary school. it is CCD, which is religion class for kids who attend public school, and which is required for them to be able to receive the sacraments. My kids attend catholic school with noncatholics, but there is no point to having any nonCatholics in a catholic education class.

[frogjerk]

This is'nt regular Catholic school. This is eat the cracker prep. Only Catholics.

I knew the anti-Catholic bigots would not be far behind on this one...

[Coleus]

I'm conflicted on this one.
The parents need to be called out on their disregard of the Third Commandment, but at the same time the kids need to be instructed no matter how slack their folks are.

It's a tough call. >>>>

You're right, the kids have souls and brains too, both of which need to be enriched.

[Coleus]

There are many Churches (including mine) which would be happy to teach Sunday School to any and all, not only those who donate. It's biased reporting like this that gives us Christians a bad name. >>

what's biased? the pastor said money was not an issue, attendance at mass was.

[wideawake]

St. Thomas opined in this way:

Every man is bound to fulfil those duties which he has undertaken to perform. Now it has been stated above that godparents take upon themselves the duties of a tutor. Consequently they are bound to watch over their godchildren when there is need for them to do so: for instance when and where children are brought up among unbelievers. But if they are brought up among Catholic Christians, the godparents may well be excused from this responsibility, since it may be presumed that the children will be carefully instructed by their parents. If, however, they perceive in any way that the contrary is the case, they would be bound, as far as they are able, to see to the spiritual welfare of their godchildren.

It would seem that the parents have the primary responsibility.

And, legally speaking, godparents can only intervene so much into their godchildren's raising.

Who knows how many of these parents have already had godparents take them to task and ignored them?

[FormerLib]

This piece is so poorly written that it's hard to tell what's really going on. For instance, early on it mentions that the kids are only being removed from religious ed courses but later on it mentions keeping them out of classes in such a way that one might infer they mean all classes.

Indeed, some posters are terming what happened to be expulsions when that is clearly not the case.

There are several things we need to know on this. First, were the parents informed about the requirement for attending Mass? Yes, I know about "days of obligation" but since the religious classes require a certain level of attendance, that needs to be spelled out as part of the class requirement.

Second, were the parents informed of the attendance tracking via the envelopes' bar coding? If so, were they able to verify their attendance by some other method (ex: what happens if you forget your envelope and just drop cash in the basket)? Could the student just inform a deacon, teacher, or lay assistant that they are there?

Third, if parents were aware of the class requirement, why weren't they making some other arrangements with the priest if family pressures or obligations were interfering with their attendance.

Yeah, the guy running the school is sure playing hardball here (please visit your local Episcopalian Church for extensive softball lessons!) but these parents wailing about having to pay the consequences for their failing to meet their obligations sure isn't evoking much sympathy from this outside observer!

[Luddite Patent Counsel]

I have no problem with keeping CINO's from receiving sacraments, whether the transgression is not attending mass, supporting abortion, or some other sufficiently serious matter. I do have a problem with the lazy practice of using donation envelopes as a litmus test. This priest has no idea whther the families are attending mass at other parishes, which would certainly fulfill their obligation. My "home" parish conducts very heterodox services, and I haven't darkened their door for over a year. Some of these families may have similar issues with this parish, and are voting with their feet.

[Coleus]

That works for Protestants but not Catholics. Mass happens all the time. >>

Right, on saturdays and about 3-4 times on Sundays. I wonder what that dude did for his Father in Law anyway?