Ho, Ho, Ho! Santa Clause has got to go! (SATIRE)

Capitol Hill Journal ^ | Dec. 23, 2005 | Paul Anthony

[WatchYourself]

12 Reasons to ban Santa (if you are a liberal!)

1. Santa’s preference to have the inexperienced Rudolph, the son of Donner, drive the sleigh appears to be an egregious example of "good ol’ boys" nepotism. To make matters worse, he promised Rudolph, the bourgeois shift manager, that "he would go down in history," while the working class reindeer are consigned to the ash heaps of relative obscurity.

2. Rumor has it that Santa is mistreating the elves in some type of sweatshop situation, clearly taking advantage of their diminutive stature. They are unquestionably overworked as they fill all the orders, most of which come from selfish, materialistic residents of the developed Western nations.

3. Santa’s insistence upon smoking his pipe in closed quarters adds to the unhealthy work environment, especially since the vertically challenged workers are hundreds of miles away from the nearest medical facility. And, at any rate, the hospital is obviously out-of-network in the company’s ineffective insurance plan.

[WatchYourself]

I always knew the "fat man" was a bigger criminal to liberals than Jesus...

[Gordongekko909]

11. Anyone who can give that many gifts to that many people for that many years must have been a filthy rich capitalist at some point in his life.

Or an inheritance-rich limousine liberal.

[Old Sarge]

I was pleased to see Freerepublic linked from that page.

[llevrok]