HOPE THIS POST WORKS, IF NOT, I'LL ASK MODS TO REMOVE IT.
http://p223.ezboard.com/Insane-things-we-went-through-in-christian-homeschool/fexpentecostalforumsfrm7.showMessage?topicID=2022.topic
nghtmrchld26 exPc Fan Posts: 108 (12/1/07 4:01 pm) Reply
Insane things we went through in christian homeschool
Me and this caller, "Devin on DMLive" were raised in homeschool and we both went through some insane stuff growing up in The Nightmare that outsiders just do not understand.
"Devin's" call begins at about 5:34 in the mp3 file from 2007-11-18 9 PM Central on dmlive.com/listenindex.html. It’s the second call in the 9 PM hour from 11-18-2007. Dawson Mcallister told Devin… “This is horrifying....”
Me, I remember the beatings and the fighting and yelling and insane rules and all the Bill Gothard bull**** and then trancing out...sh**......I'm still tranced out. I remember how it was like every day was Mission Impossible trying to keep the rules or not get caught and just....survive every single f***ing day. My mother's a f***ing psycho too, her and her whole church and christian family.
Of course people will say the usual fake answers "just stop being this way and be happy from now on..." "we don't have the time and the energy to give a s*** about you..." "you're not the only one who has it bad" "I had it a lot worse than you and I'm happy and doing great" "you're not popular you know...no one likes you very much"
I'll take Dawson's advice to Devin:
"it's almost like you've come back from a war and are having flashbacks" "ONE MORE, just ONE MORE bit of psychological abuse from your mother and you WALK, you are OUT THAT DOOR saying 'I won't live like this anymore EVER'."
I'm not getting any younger and it's time for the abuse to stop. Just because I'm not one of the "Beautiful People," just because other people don't understand or because I'm not "popular" does not mean I need to take any more s*** from anyone.
Listen to what Devin describes in his call...maybe it might help people who don't understand to.......feel what I feel
Cherish your life
| 4/28/07 7:24:33 pm | nghtmrchld26 | |
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| Re: What did your former church embrace II | 9/14/07 11:45:08 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: The things I never stopped believing in... | 8/17/07 8:17:20 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Media Hit: A church big enough for us all | 8/10/07 7:55:07 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Regal Women of Royalty??? | 8/7/07 8:50:05 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Power Struggle at Mars Hill Church | 11/24/07 10:33:03 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Child abuse in Pentecostal families | 12/25/06 4:10:27 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Child abuse in Pentecostal families | 3/25/07 8:52:36 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Good notes for those who recently left Pente/charismatic | 9/30/07 9:43:10 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Nightmares | 9/3/07 2:00:38 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: another sleepless night | 3/1/07 5:48:13 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: another sleepless night | 3/5/07 2:41:16 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Church summer camp | 8/14/07 9:01:53 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| the "Council for National Policy" and evangelicals | 8/12/07 11:29:53 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: the "Council for National Policy" and evangeli | 8/5/07 10:46:26 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: the "Council for National Policy" and evangeli | 8/6/07 8:20:59 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Eight Marks of a Mind Control Cult | 11/14/07 1:19:02 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: AFF: Mistakes Backsliders Make | 11/27/07 1:21:23 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Take the Bible Prophecy Quiz | 5/16/07 6:37:32 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: conversion to Mormon faith | 11/11/07 10:19:56 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: My YWAM Horror Story | 5/8/07 11:34:57 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Pentecostals....... | 10/30/07 4:26:04 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| A friend's experience of growing up in The Nightmare | 10/1/07 3:53:36 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| pentecostal insanity regarding media/entertainment | 4/5/07 5:17:00 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: pentecostal insanity regarding media/entertainment | 4/3/07 2:18:22 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: pentecostal insanity regarding media/entertainment | 4/3/07 11:54:21 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: pentecostal insanity regarding media/entertainment | 3/16/07 1:21:43 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Werewolves and Witches | 8/24/07 3:39:41 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Drowning in despair | 11/12/07 5:04:58 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Drowning in despair | 8/22/07 5:42:17 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Drowning in despair | 8/28/07 7:30:19 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Drowning in despair | 10/1/07 7:08:07 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Drowning in despair | 10/6/07 7:37:12 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Drowning in despair | 10/17/07 7:02:01 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Drowning in despair | 10/17/07 9:09:41 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Drowning in despair | 10/19/07 8:48:57 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Considering Suicide? | 12/1/07 2:11:56 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Conference Call | 6/24/07 10:46:49 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Conference Call UPDATE | 6/28/07 11:23:06 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Cabbage Patch Dolls | 6/17/07 3:14:45 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Trying to leave... | 11/28/07 9:15:05 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Countdown to the end.....? | 11/26/07 9:01:37 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: countdown | 11/29/07 11:46:18 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Crying all alone in pain in the nightmare of christianity... | 8/15/07 12:01:29 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: contact me please | 6/1/07 12:01:44 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Crying all alone in pain in the nightmare of christiani | 6/1/07 12:36:32 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: contact me please | 6/6/07 12:43:15 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: Crying all alone in pain in the nightmare of christianit | 8/14/07 5:22:34 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| The Nobodies | 10/28/07 11:19:17 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: condoms? | 9/10/07 5:33:48 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| "Prophetic Child" | 11/6/07 4:21:30 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: "Prophetic Child" | 9/8/07 9:01:06 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: "Prophetic Child" | 9/8/07 9:46:23 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: "Prophetic Child" | 11/4/07 6:14:23 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: "Prophetic Child" | 11/4/07 7:36:13 pm | nghtmrchld26 |
| Re: God Bribes Roberts to Leave ORU | 11/30/07 3:57:49 am | nghtmrchld26 |
| Insane things we went through in christian homeschool | 12/11/07 2:33:12 am | nghtmrchld26 |
"I bash myself to sleep, what you (and your pentecostal friends) sow I will reap.....
I scar myself you see...I wish I wasn't me
I hate therefore I am....god @#%$ your righteous hand
I throw a little fit, I slit my teenage wrist
record me with your fist
the most I can learn....is the records that you burn
you want me to save the world...I'm just a little boy
....get your gun"
I continue to be struck by his physical abuse analogies. And he appears to appropriate other's suffering and own it as his own in several places. The homeschooler who was physically abused. The girl who was physically abused by her mom. He writes as if those abuses were done to him.
Thanks! Great listing there. Looks like they only deleted his most recent posts, the ones with the most threatening tones. The most recent I found was 12/1/07 (you have one listed as 12/11 but it’s actually 12/1).
Thanks.
What a litany of personal horror—regardless of how much of it was real vs fantasized.