Posted on 10/14/2012 4:58:40 PM PDT by dead
Its a holiday classic Mayor Bloomberg would love.
A sanitized version of A Visit from St. Nicholas edits out all references to Santa Claus pipe habit and critics say its yet another example of political correctness run amok.
A one-woman vice squad self-published Canadian author Pamela McColl kicked St. Nicks butt habit in a new version of the beloved poem about the night before Christmas.
McColl deleted two verses The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth/and the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath and hired an illustrator to redraw Santa without his pipe and halo of tobacco haze.
No one can backtrack now, McColl crowed to The Post. Santa has stopped smoking, and 2012 is the year he quit, and theres nothing anyone can do about it.
But not everyone is celebrating Kris Kringle going cold turkey after 189 years.
Leave my story alone! This change is not officially sanctioned by the North Pole, said Nicholas Trolli, president of the Amalgamated Order of Real Bearded Santas.
Critics wonder if the meddling willl stop at a smokeless Santa.
Maybe they should talk about the fact that hes also overweight and that he probably drinks, griped Jackie Blackwell, chief elf and owner of a Canadian Christmas store.
Literary-minded critics accuse McColl of censoring history...
(Excerpt) Read more at newyorkpost.com ...
Ahhh tolerance!
By the 3rd year of Baraq’s second term, Santa will be a member of the Choom Gang....
I'm just shocked the line,"Twas the Night before Christmas" hasn't been changed to "Twas the Night before the winter holiday".....
.....yet!
but he does stuff their stockings with condoms and birth control pills
If he used a bong it would be okay.
LOL
So instead of Christmas, shouldn’t it be “holiday” for these libtards?
From Stan Freeberg’s “Green Christmas” classic:
SCROOGE: You there, Crass, uhh, I suppose your company’s running the usual
magazine ads showing cartons of your cigarettes peeking out of the top of Santa’s sack?
CRASS: Better than that! This year we have him smoking one.
SCROOGE: Um-hmmm...
CRASS: Yes. We’ve got Santa a little more rugged, too.
Both sleeves rolled up and a tattoo on each arm. One of ‘em says “Merry Christmas.”
SCROOGE: What does the other one say?
CRASS: “Less tar!”
SCROOGE: Great stuff!
That almost comes across as rhyming, so he probably does.
I guess we can’t leave cookies for him anymore, either. Maybe carrots and celery sticks.
Screw this PC crap! I’m still leaving him big ole homemade chocolate chip cookies and whole milk!
If the democrats stay in power, there will come a day when Santa is “gay”, is married to a guy named “Tooth Fairy”, and Santa will be required to give the ‘naughty’ kids gifts that were taken from the ‘nice’ kids by his AA hired-goverment paid ‘helpers’.
While visions of Helen Thomas and Sandra Fluke danced in their heads.
Freakin’ liberal moonbats!
As Santa morphs into a half-black Muslim Richard Simmons transsexual vegan dwarf Communist agitator...
That PC barking moonbat is also probably out there protesting cross monuments in public squares whenever the atheists are raising the song against G-d & religion.
It’s coming to a war, folks, and it’s coming soon.
Deus vult!
Turkeys, and not the kind I like at Christmas. Think I’ll fire up the old briar tonight (I indulge now and then) just out of spite.
Turkeys, and not the kind I like at Christmas. Think I’ll fire up the old briar tonight (I indulge now and then) just out of spite.
Next we will have Mary and Joseph traveling to Bethlehem in a Chevy Volt.
Because it has the nearest Planned Barrenhood clinic and the evil conservatives prayed the other ones out of business.
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