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Suzanne Venker: The War On Men
Fox News ^ | Published November 26, 2012

Posted on 11/30/2012 4:17:23 PM PST by drewh

Believe it or not, modern women want to get married. Trouble is, men don’t.

The so-called dearth of good men (read: marriageable men) has been a hot subject in the media as of late. Much of the coverage has been in response to the fact that for the first time in history, women have become the majority of the U.S. workforce. They’re also getting most of the college degrees. The problem? This new phenomenon has changed the dance between men and women.

Women aren’t women anymore.

To say gender relations have changed dramatically is an understatement. Ever since the sexual revolution, there has been a profound overhaul in the way men and women interact. Men haven’t changed much – they had no revolution that demanded it – but women have changed dramatically.

Now the men have nowhere to go.

What if the dearth of good men, and ongoing battle of the sexes, is – hold on to your seats – women’s fault?

You’ll never hear that in the media. All the articles and books (and television programs, for that matter) put women front and center, while men and children sit in the back seat. But after decades of browbeating the American male, men are tired. Tired of being told there’s something fundamentally wrong with them. Tired of being told that if women aren’t happy, it’s men’s fault.

Contrary to what feminists like Hanna Rosin, author of The End of Men, say, the so-called rise of women has not threatened men. It has pissed them off. Men want to love women, not compete with them. They want to provide for and protect their families – it’s in their DNA. But modern women won’t let them.

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1 posted on 11/30/2012 4:17:25 PM PST by drewh
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To: drewh

I agree. I’m 22 and could not find anyone my age (or close to it) who was either worth marrying or interested in being married. Got lots of offers for short-term relationships and non-committal shack-ups from them but nothing else.

Finally met a great guy who is a lot older than me. My mom is jealous of what I have.

Seriously, women wanted to be men and now they’re reaping what they sowed. It’ll be generations before the damage of 150 years of lesbian feminism is undone.


2 posted on 11/30/2012 4:26:16 PM PST by MeganC (Our forefathers would be shooting by now.)
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To: drewh

I married a fine woman, one that hates feminism with a passon. But then, I married a woman, not a man in a womans body. My wife treats me like her lord, but then, I lay down my life for her. Hard to tell who sacrifices the most, but then, who’s counting?

Seems most women today never stop counting.


3 posted on 11/30/2012 4:26:37 PM PST by American in Israel (A wise man's heart directs him to the right, but the foolish mans heart directs him toward the left.)
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To: drewh

>> Men want to love women, not compete with them.

When women fail in the competitive arena, it’s the fault of men.

50+ million abortions later, what’s to respect?

I’m 50/50 on this criticism, but it’s certainly not fallacious.


4 posted on 11/30/2012 4:30:46 PM PST by Gene Eric (Demoralization is a weapon of the enemy. Don't get it, don't spread it!)
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To: drewh
My wife tells me nearly every week how happy she is. She is beautiful, gentle, feminine and everything feminists are not.

I'm an unreconstructed troglodyte.

Go figure.

5 posted on 11/30/2012 4:32:01 PM PST by WorkingClassFilth
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To: drewh

American men are getting their emotional comfort from each other in the new normal. They hug each other all the time and soon they will hold hands like the Moslems do.


6 posted on 11/30/2012 4:32:01 PM PST by donna (Pray for revival.)
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Donate here!

It’s nearly Turkey destruction time ,again.
Let’s give Jim an early CHRISTmas and finish this thing! Eh?

7 posted on 11/30/2012 4:32:20 PM PST by moose07 (The truth will out, one day.)
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To: drewh

It’s articles like this that’ll put the Lifetime Channel out of business.


8 posted on 11/30/2012 4:33:27 PM PST by glorgau
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To: MeganC; American in Israel
I married a fine woman, one that hates feminism with a passon. But then, I married a woman, not a man in a womans body.

BINGO!

I'm 24 and I found the love of my life who loves being a woman.

But then she also wasn't raised in this Society, which has now become so Men Hating it has poisoned our future relationships.

9 posted on 11/30/2012 4:33:35 PM PST by KC_Lion (Build the America you want to live in at your address, and keep looking up.-Sarah Palin)
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To: MeganC

I am a deacon in my church and my wife and I have care over about 20 individuals and families. I often hear complaints from the young ladies that guys (I wont call them men) are only interested in short term relationships. They also tell me that the only men worth marrying are 10 to 20 years older than them.


10 posted on 11/30/2012 4:33:45 PM PST by taxcontrol
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To: drewh

There are a lot of men who like women, but not American women.
I know a lot of navy men who married Japanese women.


11 posted on 11/30/2012 4:36:43 PM PST by forgotten man (forgotten man)
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To: WorkingClassFilth

My wife says equal rights are stupid — she doesn’t want to be demoted.


12 posted on 11/30/2012 4:37:36 PM PST by KC Burke (Plain Conservative opinions and common sense correction for thirteen years. RSC)
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To: taxcontrol

Sounds to me like your pastor (or you) need to deliver a serious butt-kicking to the young men. A Biblical butt-kicking, but butt-kicking nonetheless.


13 posted on 11/30/2012 4:37:41 PM PST by WorkingClassFilth
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To: drewh
Thanks Dr drewh...Should a man get married ??.. Lets weigh the cost / benefit ratio. Your wife for any reason and at any time can divorce you, kick you out of the house you have paid for, keep you from seeing your kids, take half of your income and even, now get this, take half of the money in you 401K, that you have put in from your job. And a judge will say that's only fair....Hummm ...now let's see.....
14 posted on 11/30/2012 4:41:23 PM PST by virgil283 ( "Nobody ever expects the zombie apocalypse...")
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To: drewh
Fortunately, there is good news: women have the power to turn everything around. All they have to do is surrender to their nature – their femininity – and let men surrender to theirs.

Helen Andelin presented this argument in her book Fascinating Womanhood (Santa Barbara, Calif.: Pacific Press, 1963). Although this book has remained in print for nearly a half century and is sort of an underground classic, the mainstream media ignored it in favor of the "women's lib" crowd.

15 posted on 11/30/2012 4:42:23 PM PST by Fiji Hill (Io Triumphe!)
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To: MeganC

Hm. You found a much older guy and want to tell everyone how Mom is jealous? Better be careful, dear.


16 posted on 11/30/2012 4:42:39 PM PST by Mamzelle
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To: MeganC
My third marriage ended in divorce in 1985. I've been single ever since.

Younger female friends are always trying to 'fix-me-up' with one of their lonely, old female friends.

I just fine by myself without all the hassles.

17 posted on 11/30/2012 4:44:04 PM PST by blam
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To: WorkingClassFilth

While I get your point, there is a huge number difference between the young ladies and young men in our church. I’m not sure why that is at the moment. Perhaps a “wave” of baby girls? We also have some recently joined ladies who were single and then had a child and the sperm donor ran off.

sigh - lots of work to do for both sexes.

We are a small church that is focused on bringing in the non-believer or the first time Christian. Meet them in love, start them on basic Christian tenants and concepts. Get the world view of “Christian” out of their head and replace it with a Bible view of Christian. In some cases, that can take several years.


18 posted on 11/30/2012 4:44:04 PM PST by taxcontrol
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To: drewh

When I retired after 26 years with one company, I told my
boss that now I’d be able to fix breakfest for my husband
any day of the week instead of just weekends. My house has
never been cleaner and I can garden and do other things I
only dreamed of having time when I worked full time. I’ve
really enjoyed being a housewife and my hubby likes it that
way. We really have time to enjoy each other now.
If I was young now, I’d only have children if I could stay
at home and be a full time mother and wife.


19 posted on 11/30/2012 4:49:20 PM PST by jusduat (on the mercy of the Lord alone.)
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To: glorgau

It’s articles like this that’ll put the Lifetime Channel out of business.


I call it the MAP channel, (Men are Pigs). My wife used to get mad at me when I would call it that. That is until I forced myself to sit down with her and watch a couple of the movies. I critiqued them from a Mans point of view. An interesting thing happened though, She stopped watching the MAP channel.


20 posted on 11/30/2012 4:50:30 PM PST by The Working Man
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To: drewh

I think this article is bullshit. Most women I know are pretty balanced, not the feminazis she describes.


21 posted on 11/30/2012 4:53:27 PM PST by gotribe
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To: drewh
They’re also getting most of the college degrees.

Which means they're also taking on most of the student loan debt.

Just what I want to marry; a $70,000 student loan.

22 posted on 11/30/2012 4:56:16 PM PST by E. Pluribus Unum (Labor unions are the Communist Party of the USA.)
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To: drewh

There was a great quote in the movie Dark Shadows, a campy comedy set in the early 1970s, the discussion between two very feminine tradtional women. One asks the other;

“Do you think the sexes should be equal?” “Heavens no. Then men would become unmanageable.” .

There is a lot of truth to that statement, not in that women are superior in any way, but that it unbalances and disturbs the woman/man relationship by confusing rolls instead of complementing them.


23 posted on 11/30/2012 4:57:48 PM PST by Wildbill22
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To: drewh
I think I'm seeing a trend...Gay isn't gay. Investment is immediate consumption. Feminist aren't very feminine...

Reason requires words be used precisely and sophistry requires the opposite.

24 posted on 11/30/2012 4:59:14 PM PST by Red Dog #1
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To: drewh

Size matters. Today, about 75% of women are not interested in anything except the size of his bank account. A good man who is just starting out is nothing to the vast gold digger class, who will sleep with an 85 year old Alzheimer patient if he’s loaded. It is an ugly situation for our society.


25 posted on 11/30/2012 5:06:47 PM PST by txrefugee
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To: drewh
Why would any heterosexual male want to get married to a man in a dress? That's what females have become. YES I KNOW THERE ARE EXCEPTIONS, OF COURSE!! No sense sugarcoating or ignoring that problem. Females overturned God's plan for nature then wonder why it doesn't work?

Why do we all still love the 'I Love Lucy' show? Because he had his role and she had her role. A bit extreme yes, but there were differences in their roles and without political correctness too. Simple as that. This is why TV today SUCKS. There's no contrast between the sexes. Females DOMINATE leading roles and actions and men are always weak, subservient, clueless and never allowed to trump the female; GIRL POWER, even in the most mundane commercials. This reverse role crap IS NOT NATURAL and that's why TV sucks; EVERYTHING'S CONTRIVED FOR POLITICAL CORRECTNESS' SAKE AND DOES NOT FOLLOW NATURE AS ORDAINED BY GOD!!

26 posted on 11/30/2012 5:12:53 PM PST by Obama_Is_Sabotaging_America (IMPEACH OBAMA)
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To: drewh
Now the men have nowhere to go.

There was a character called Joe the Love Potato on Jonathan Brandmeier's Chicago radio show, back in the 80's. It got started as a comedy bit which was a monologue by Joe, as he interacted with his (unheard) live-in girl friend who was getting ready for work and making him breakfast as he settled in for a long day of lolling around. The line I remember is when she serves him the eggs over easy with bacon that he asked for and he observes, "Oh, there's a hair on the eggs ... That's OK, I just won't eat them."

This was such a smash he got the guy to do more bits, and he put him in his stage show, where he appeared permanently ensconced in his easy chair. I always thought it was a brilliant satire on the male response to aggressive feminism, but think how much further things have gone since then!

27 posted on 11/30/2012 5:19:03 PM PST by dr_lew
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To: txrefugee
Men care only about sex and a woman's face and body. Women care only about a man's status and how rich he is. So the question becomes, "Who's worse, men or women?"

Hmmmm.. (Don't get upset ladies, but) Since men adore a woman's PHYSICAL BODY I would say THAT trumps women liking a man's peripheral aspects that have absolutely NOTHING to do with HIS ACTUAL BEING.

So, MEN WIN!! Okay, I'm ducking now Ladies.. Bombs away!!!! LOL

28 posted on 11/30/2012 5:22:56 PM PST by Obama_Is_Sabotaging_America (IMPEACH OBAMA)
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To: drewh

I’ve told my oldest son....if she thinks abortion is a noble right and has a Che Guevara poster....run as fast as you can!


29 posted on 11/30/2012 5:23:27 PM PST by Scotswife
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To: Obama_Is_Sabotaging_America

Status and wealth had nothing to do with my choice in a husband


30 posted on 11/30/2012 5:26:55 PM PST by Scotswife
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To: Obama_Is_Sabotaging_America
Men want ( . )( . ) & ( (

Women want $$$ & @>--->----

LOL!

31 posted on 11/30/2012 5:29:30 PM PST by Obama_Is_Sabotaging_America (IMPEACH OBAMA)
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Woo hoo!! Less than $1.3k to go!! We can do this.
130 Donations @ $10.00 each!
Let's put this baby to bed!!

32 posted on 11/30/2012 5:32:26 PM PST by RedMDer (Please support Toys for Tots this CHRISTmas season.)
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To: drewh
Back in the late 1970’s or early 1980’s I picked up a small discount hardback book that was making the very same points as made here. The feminists have taught women to hate men and see them as predators and worse. That some of these feminist icons were lesbians should not come as a surprise. The feminist movement has so poisoned the water that American males are screwed when it comes to finding a good woman.

Attention American women: here's a point to ponder. Foreign women PREFER American men over their men. Why? Because they understand the traditional male-female roles and find American men a better choice if they can land one. What is interesting is that both foreign men and women dislike American women as rude, pushy, overly aggressive, and unpleasant to be around.

So American women, when you whine about the lack of “good” men, perhaps you need to look at the world that you have wrought. Any man who loves you is screwed the minute he marries you. He marries you and his legal rights are ended. He becomes the wife's or ex-wife’s defacto wage slave for most of his life. God help him if there are kids because they will be used as weapons against him so the enraged ex-wife can keep exacting her vengeance on the schlub. Sometimes, the vengeful ex-wife even pursues the former spouse after the grave.

33 posted on 11/30/2012 5:39:11 PM PST by MasterGunner01
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To: taxcontrol

“We also have some recently joined ladies who were single and then had a child and the sperm donor ran off.”

I’ve dealt with many of these ladies. Ask the ones complaining about how none of the men are ‘mature’ enough, whether they are still virgins. :)

Works every time.


34 posted on 11/30/2012 5:54:33 PM PST by JCBreckenridge (They may take our lives... but they'll never take our FREEDOM!)
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To: drewh

girls and boys are taught they’re just animals.

experiment with sex. have multipe partners, have fun before being tied down.

men are taught they’re expendable and unnecessary in the family.

they have to compete against women for fewer and fewer jobs in a shrinking economy.

if they have kids and get divorced, family court treats them as criminals on probation and they’re wage slaves for years to a couple decades.

good luck if the guy wants to wear the pants in the family and call the shots as to what goes on in the house.

there are fewer and fewer upsides to marriage for guys nowadays.


35 posted on 11/30/2012 6:05:38 PM PST by Secret Agent Man (I can neither confirm or deny that; even if I could, I couldn't - it's classified.)
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To: blam

amen, brother. but if you are still hoping to find a good one, i hope you do.


36 posted on 11/30/2012 6:08:35 PM PST by Secret Agent Man (I can neither confirm or deny that; even if I could, I couldn't - it's classified.)
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To: American in Israel
But then, I married a woman, not a man in a womans body.

When I got married, 32+ years ago, I was looking for a life partner who had a mind of her own, accomplishments of her own, a career of her own. I wanted to marry a woman-- a human being, not a slave or a blow-up doll. We're still doing great, TYVM.

37 posted on 11/30/2012 6:10:33 PM PST by Lurking Libertarian (Non sub homine, sed sub Deo et lege)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

that’s debt racked up before the marriage, it isn’t joint debt. the things you have before the marriage, assets and debt, are yours. the things you accumulate during the marriage are joint.


38 posted on 11/30/2012 6:12:05 PM PST by Secret Agent Man (I can neither confirm or deny that; even if I could, I couldn't - it's classified.)
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To: blam

With you brother. Married only once, never again, it is cheaper to buy it.

If a woman wants a man start being a woman.


39 posted on 11/30/2012 6:15:52 PM PST by Little Bill (A)
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To: Obama_Is_Sabotaging_America

pretty only gets you so far when the romance phase goes away.

men like a good body but not a babbling airhead, a passive aggressive psychopath, or a gold-digging shrew.


40 posted on 11/30/2012 6:16:17 PM PST by Secret Agent Man (I can neither confirm or deny that; even if I could, I couldn't - it's classified.)
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To: KC Burke

I told my wife when she turned 40 I was going to trade her in on two twenty year olds. She said I wasn’t wired for 220.


41 posted on 11/30/2012 6:18:54 PM PST by spudville
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To: spudville

When I turned 50 I told a good friend that I could do things now that I never could do at age 20.He said,name one.I said like finding 40 year old women attractive.


42 posted on 11/30/2012 6:28:09 PM PST by Farmer Dean (stop worrying about what they want to do to you,start thinking about what you want to do to them)
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To: MeganC

I appreciate your candor, and I think you’re on the right track.

I think it goes beyond what Suzanne Venker wrote here, and she may address more in some of her other writings. I would hope so.

When women left the home to seek a new life, they changed the workplace in ways they didn’t understand they would.

Before women entered the work force in a major way, we had one wage-earner families. The male went off to work, and he brought home the proverbial bacon. Mom stayed home and managed the home, and nurtured the children.

Now I’m not here to advocate for a woman left at home with no education, to be dominated by her spouse. I seriously have a problem with that. I’m sure you do too. But when women entered the work force, they doubled the presence of a commodity in the workplace. Labor.

If you have an over-supply of something, what happens? The value of that something goes down. If there are twice as many strawberries in the market-place, the cost of strawberries is going to be affected by downward pressure.

IMO, the two wage earner family allowed businesses to keep wages artificially low. We flooded the work-force with workers, and what happened? Wages came under downward pressure. If it was easier to replace workers, you didn’t have to pay a worker as much to keep them around.

I submit that if we returned to the one wage earner family, it would go a long way toward combating the downward pressure outsourcing has brought to the table.

There are other dynamics at play here as well.

In the 70s, the education folks got together and wept on each others shoulders, because women were under-represented in certain fields. It goes beyond this, but lets keep it rather simple.

Curricula was changed so that girls/young women would find these fields more enticing. It was actually quite successful. Teaching methods changed. And as those changes came into being, strangely enough, little boys began to lag behind just as the girls had.

Now we have little boys who aren’t interested in certain subjects. Whats more little boys who need to go outside to run and play and burn off energy so they can focus better, lost the only avenue they had to do this, as more and more schools eliminated recesses. Girls who didn’t need to burn off excess energy, did just fine. And sadly, nobody actually cared what this did to little boys.

In short, we have completely short-circuited the education experience for boys.

Society has also done it’s best to change what little boys should grow up to be. They are now expected to be sensitive, caring, and obsessed with going out of their way to please women. And this has gone so far as to irk women, who when the time comes want an actual man to pair off with.

The more feminine metro sexual male isn’t pleasing anyone. Men have angst over it. Women loath it. The popular culture now shows more male ass than it does female ass. I’m not trying to be crass here, but frankly it grosses me out to see so much male rump. What the hell?

And what’s all this kissing? I don’t kiss guys at all, let alone on the lips. There is a concerted effort to turn me into something in between a full male and a flaming flamingo dancer, if you catch my drift.

I sure wish women would speak up regarding this. I would think it would gross them out too.

At any rate, it does please me to see articles like this once in a while. We need to put the brakes on this roller coaster. It’s out of control.

Hope you don’t mind me picking you to talk to, because you exhibited a grasp of the material in the article.


43 posted on 11/30/2012 6:32:23 PM PST by DoughtyOne (Hurricane Sandy..., a week later and over 60 million Americans still didn't have power.)
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To: Secret Agent Man; Little Bill
"but if you are still hoping to find a good one, i hope you do."

I'm not even in the market. I'm done.

I enjoy living alone now.

44 posted on 11/30/2012 6:32:59 PM PST by blam
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To: drewh

I had up until this past September 10, 2012, a wonderful and I mean a TRULY wonderful 21 years of a loving man/woman relationship with Christian, Bible loving gentleman, seven years younger and a very hard working guy. For the glory of the Good Sheperd, he pointed me in the direction of the Good Sheperd and King of Kings. I was seven years older, yet the love we had was and in a special, right after I had a life threatening illness and emergency dental surgery, during the last two months of his life, went very deep indeed.

We had plans for the rest of our lives together including marriage as well as to be able to grow old together, which would have included possible living in North Carolina, but God had better plans for him, and after a very brief and sudden illness, God took him home to his eternal reward and rest at the age of 46.

As a significant other widow, I will MISS BIGTIME this coming Christmas, but the one confort I could take is that he will celibrate Christmas in Heaven with the King of Kings.


45 posted on 11/30/2012 6:35:27 PM PST by Biggirl ("Jesus talked to us as individuals"-Jim Vicevich/Thanks JimV!)
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To: drewh

Opps, forget to say, WILL MISS BIGTIME this coming Christmas my beloved SO.


46 posted on 11/30/2012 6:36:53 PM PST by Biggirl ("Jesus talked to us as individuals"-Jim Vicevich/Thanks JimV!)
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To: Lurking Libertarian

Ever laid your life down for a slave?


47 posted on 11/30/2012 6:37:45 PM PST by American in Israel (A wise man's heart directs him to the right, but the foolish mans heart directs him toward the left.)
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To: MeganC

I wanted to mention something to you.

When I read your post, I focused more on the reaction to the article than your age. As I was writing, I thought I was talking to a person older than you are.

I hope I didn’t offend you, and there was certainly no intent to.

Take care.


48 posted on 11/30/2012 6:38:39 PM PST by DoughtyOne (Hurricane Sandy..., a week later and over 60 million Americans still didn't have power.)
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To: blam

At this point in my life, after a what was truly a loving longtime relationship which ended in sudden death of my SO, it is more likely I am finished with dating men.


49 posted on 11/30/2012 6:41:26 PM PST by Biggirl ("Jesus talked to us as individuals"-Jim Vicevich/Thanks JimV!)
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To: drewh

I know young men who want to commit but will not because they do not want to be on the hook for massive amounts of child support or having to give up half of their property to a woman who is not committed.


50 posted on 11/30/2012 6:44:13 PM PST by tbw2
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