Skip to comments.Should I Become a Woman and Risk Causing Pain to My Wife and Children?
Posted on 02/04/2013 7:53:55 AM PST by reaganaut1
Ive been living the life of a married man for 20 years. I have a successful career and three children. All this time, however, I have battled gender dysphoria and the deep sadness that comes from living a lie. From the earliest age, Ive been unhappy being male. I believed I would find happiness only once I was true to myself. I recently had my self-diagnosis confirmed, and Im initiating a transition to living as the real me. There is a cost involved: pain to my family and stress on my career. Ethically, is it right to be true to myself even if that authenticity ends my otherwise happy marriage and damages the emotional stability of my three children? If I had to maintain the lie, the emotional cost would be tremendous; a transition would share the pain with all who love me but might result in happiness. Whats the ethically correct thing to do? NAME WITHHELD, MASSACHUSETTS
(Excerpt) Read more at nytimes.com ...
NYT commenter Jackie has a sad story of how her ex-husband ruined their family.
Just plain nuts.
A good pastor, priest, or rabbi will be far more effective than a surgeon.
“True to myself”
Translation: Indulge my perversions.
He has problems and the butcher psychiatrists have convinced him its the plumbing God gave him.
He needs God in his life.
Sheesh. And I thought I had problems.
Perhaps the most humane thing he could do would be to drive down a country lane at about 70 mph and crash his car into a big oak tree.
No—You are an immature fool—it aint about YOU!
teh grass is always greener...
find a good therapist - not one of teh avant garde nitwits, but someone who can help you accept yourself as you are.
and posting to a web page isn’t the best way to get advice...
Kind'a fitting for barroom drunks.
We all sober here in FR ... especially after Sunday church Monday mornin'
We were created to Serve God and to Love One Another. The choice to serve self is selfish and this man is choosing to serve himself selfishly rather than meet his responsibilities to take care and love his family.
He should roundly be condemned. Not only will he foster confusion in his wife (whom he promised to love), but generational confusion in his children whom he promised to love when had them with his wife.
He is forgetting the commandment not to Commit the Adulteration of Marriage and needs to die to self and serve the Lord of Love who died in the place of folks like him.
Yeah, no kidding.
While this "man" may be unhappy you have no right to happiness and if he were to pursue what makes him happy, what about the happiness of his family. Suck it up pal!
All the problems in our country and the world and the NY slimes have the gall to print an article on this subject?
Good grief, guy, grow up, man up, and ask for a brain grant.
There's a reason for that, and it isn't because someone slipped up at the baby factory and accidentally put a girl's soul in a boy's body. If you've fathered three children, the reason is likely far in the past and would need dedicated and trained therapy to discover, and probably years of intense work to rectify.
You may think it's easy to just whip out a knife and cut your penis off. But it's not. You'll go through a personal hell as you make the "transition," and, as you say, likely put others through hell as well. And, in the end, you won't be a woman. You'll be a man who looks like a woman. It's not likely that will make things better.
It's time you pushed yourself past the feel-good politically correct answer that says you were just born a screwed-up person. Take some responsibility for what you have become, even if the cause was other people in your life. Get someone to help you dig back into your memory until you find the cause, then go through the pain of dealing with it.
You will be much happier if you learn how to be the man you were born to be than trying to run away from it.
None of this seems to make much of an impression on the former dad, who is convinced that this was the only course his life could have taken.
I checked his bio. Deval Patrick only has two children.
...”To state the obvious, he fathered three children and is a man, even if he is unhappy. Many Americans cannot accept reality, or we would not be in the current mess.
NYT commenter Jackie has a sad story of how her ex-husband ruined their family.”...
I have wondered many times in my life why God made the sexual desire so insane that it destroys so much in the lives of human beings. It seems that only drug addiction can trump sex in terms of putting self interest above all else. Who in their right mind would throw away what this man has for an unknown future? Few people in this life get everything they want.
(1) Just look between your legs and see what God gave you ON YOUR BIRTHDAY!!..
(2) Read & contemplate Psalm 139... and accept the way you were created...
Ask God to help you... and heal you....
(3) ..being "true to myself" ...
...Is pop-culture psycho-babble code for extraordinary selfishness -- GET OVER IT!
(4) Stop listening to the voices (whether "doctors" or demons) that have apparently convinced you that you are a woman trapped in a male body...
-- Think about it.... REALLY??
(5) You are most correct when you realize the pain you will cause your wife of 20 years and your family.
Why can’t he be satisfied wearing womens panties like the rest of us.
What? What did I say? Um No, I never wear my wifes panties, no siree bob, nope, not me
Why advertise? Just do what you want and keep it to yourself. We really don’t need to know anything about this person.
Geez, they gotta name for everything. Hey buddy, reach down, pull that little trigger up and look down at it and recall what it did for you and your family. It is there for a reason. You get confused, reach down and pull it up again and remember what it did for you and your family.
First,he should take it for a test drive. I’m retired and my wife is still working. I have news for you sweetie!
“Who in their right mind would throw away what this man has for an unknown future?”
As a society, we have nurtured such a “me” mentality. It’s for me, me, me. Essentially, if it makes “me” happy then to heck with everyone else. Gone is teaching and endorsing responsibility. This man stood up in front of God and family and married. He willingly sired two/three children. His responsibility is to be a husband and Father. But... he now wants to be a woman to make himself happy. The wife and kids will just have to deal with this loss to them and focus on how Dad in a dress is now “happy”. Happiness trumps responsibility a lot these days and unfortunately... his kids will be paying the price. IMHO.
Another mentally ill degenerate completely focused on himself.
“I believed I would find happiness only once I was true to myself. “
There you have it. It’s not about being true to others - it’s about him. His happiness. His belief. Nothing more than a variation on the theme of narcissism, and the research-based prognosis, BTW, for finding “happiness” through the changes he plans is quite, quite poor.
For the life of me (as a man), I can’t imagine what would cause a man to look down at his Johnson and think: “That’s really gotta go.”
Anyone who could be happy destroying the lives of his wife and children for his own selfish desires is an a-hole. They’re better off without him and should leave him to the lifetime of misery and perversion he will have created for himself.
This is what the Slimes considers newsworthy....
Has he already had his choppadickoffamy procedure?
I’m content to go on being a male lesbian. No identity issues here. Can’t do anything about my innate attraction to the female sex, so I’ll settle for making it politically correct.
Sounds like a job for the QSA. Queer scouts of America.
This guy just needs to shut up and go away, I am sick of the selfish drama queens telling us about their sick azzed woes.
He is unhappy (who isn’t at this point?) but wants to completely upturn his children’s world to pander to his degeneracy. And that will make things better how?
First, this is is a uniquely selfish person.
Second, he’s focusing on this issue of his perversion, instead of diverting himself away from it by meditating on truth.
Get drunk too... that would cover the suicide clause in the insurance.
[ Just plain nuts.
A good pastor, priest, or rabbi will be far more effective than a surgeon. ]
Or lack thereof...
But wouldn’t a rabbi be able to “snip the tip” as it were...
Sorry I saw irony in your statement.
In the long run, it'll be less traumatic for all concerned.
NO, you idiot!
Well, from what I see, in our society, at this time, the people who have it best are hot young girls. We used to value them because they produced and raised children. Now, they are valuable for sex and advertising. We used to value women with wide hips because they were more successful at producing children. Now, we like rakes with big boobs. And, by the way, we used to like big boobs because they were better for raising children. We can thank Hugh Heffner, Hollywood and Madison Avenue for how screwed up relations are between men and women.
If they knew from an early age why the heck did they get married and involve a family in it in the first place?
I don’t care about what someone does to themself, as long as it doesn’t pick my pocket or break my leg. But they are breaking their family’s leg and picking their family’s pocket in a manner of speaking.
The state shouldn’t pay for ANY of this and they shouldn;t make their wife and kids pay an emotional price for this either.
If they wanna do this when they are single and young and dumb then they can go knock themselves out.
I’m sure that he will only need micro surgery to remove what little manhood he may have. Then they can drill a hole, hook up some plumbing and make him into the freak he wants to be. I met one of these freaks on his way to a women’s prison. It was 6’3, had size 13 heels, a huge Adams Apple, playboy breasts and was seriously mentally disturbed. The doctor who performed the surgery should have been thrown in prison.
You LOOOOOK Mahvelous! Don’t you ever change!
Trust me, a good kick in his groin will convince him that he is male. Something he obviously needs. That is a lot kinder than the butchery he is bargaining for.
My advice would be to save it in a jar, cause he is going to discover that being surgically altered does not bring happiness.
I’ve been thinking along the same lines. I know the surgery is expensive but I’ve always thought of myself as a kumquat, lazing in the kumquat field, soaking up the sunshine, getting a serious kumquat buzz when Farmer John sprays a load of fresh manure over the place. I’m sure it’ll piss off the folks, but I have to be true to my inner vegetable.
Nailed it. This guy is going to destroy, his life, the life of his spouse, and the lives of his three children so he can hedonistically live out his perverse fantasy.
This is a clear example that people are losing their grip on reality and are descending into depravity. It does not help that Obama and the Democrat leadership endorses this deviancy.
Now that we have sanctioned this deviancy on a national level we will get to watch the velocity of our decent pick up rapidly. Not too soon before our society is in absolute free fall.
Further translation: “be completely selfish”.
WE can all rest easy now. You are merely waiting for your wife when people spot you at Victoria’s Secret. A credible excuse, to be sure. LOL