Posted on 06/13/2013 5:49:58 PM PDT by Oscar in Batangas
Dear Mr. President
` ` I hereby absolve you of ANY responsibility to protect my family from terrorism on our farm. I have some pretty spiffy self-defense gadgets and have established decent clear zones around the house and out-buildings. So I think we can take care of most terrorist threats on our own for now.
` Of course, I'll let you know if that EVER changes. (But thanks for standing by--just in case.)
` ` In exchange, please remove the surveillance you are conducting on our mail, cell phones, internet, credit cards and CB/shortwave radios. You don't need me to provide you with the list of identifiers, right???
` Any adjustment to my 4th Amendment rights has always been handled by the county sheriff. My indiscretions were of the 'loud muffler', and 'failure to come to a complete stop' variety. Sheriff Tom has helped me remain a law-abiding citizen since then. So please don't worry yourself about my past, regrettable infractions to America's overall peace and order.
` ` I encourage you to redirect your surveillance resources, presently aimed in our direction, to anyone named 'Moha....', 'Huss....', and 'el- (or al-) ....', for starters --- Especially those who are here on expired visas or via fake documentation of some sort or other.
` ` One last thing. Please compute how much my opt-out offer saves the US Government annually and show me how to claim that amount via a line item deduction on our 1040. Since early 2009, our finances have been a bit tight. The several thousand extra dollars yearly will be faithfully invested in shovel (plow)-ready projects in Northeast Kansas.
` ` As loyal as ever, (Interpret THAT, however you wish)
` Oscar from Batangas
Good. I think we should all take the deduction plus a few more.
Sounds good to me. Don’t forget to CC all your representatives from both parties.
I keep telling my accountant I want to opt out of Social Security and be responsible for my own finances.
And every year he laughs and says, “You owe X. Check or money order?”
“Oh, good, I can play golf some more.”
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