This Children’s Book Is Super Adorable And Just Happens To Have A Gay Protagonist (barf alert)

Buzz Feed ^ | March 10, 2014 | Aaron Calvin and Arianna Rebolini

[<1/1,000,000th%]

With an armored colostomy bag?

[massgopguy]

Does he try to explain Battle Tactics to his boyfriend’s father Long Shanks?

[mojito]

I looked at the sample pictures.

And now I’m feeling a bit nauseous.

[Darren McCarty]

Why are these rooster suckers obsessed with kids?

[abigkahuna]

For those that have ventured to Smashwords.com, you may have been downloading the sample of the book. The code given above is good for the whole book (until March 27). It is available in any format required, including pdf. If you scroll down just a bit more on the page, there are the buttons for full download.

Of course you will be asked to sign up to smashwords. Just use one of your auxiliary emails if you desire.

Why did I go the e-books route? It is simple. If you are finally chosen by one of the big publishing houses, you would have say a couple of weeks on the shelf. If your book did not sell, then it is boxed up and sent to the book dungeon. With an e-book, as long as there is electricity, it is out there in the aether. It can easily be revised, relaunched with a new cover, whatever. In fact, in the future I am going to revise the book with several illustration plates at the major chapter breaks.

It is a wholesome story. No agendas. Some very mild poking at media and political figures in generality. The story is about a little girl that lost her turtle. It is not just any turtle, but Zack and Mack, a two-headed turtle. I won’t give away any spoilers. I will say that the story is suitable for all humans, but written with eight to fourteen year olds in mind. The writing level pegged out at around 4.8. So it is around a fourth to fifth grade level book (according to Microsoft word).

Download it for free. If you liked the story, I would encourage you to go back and write a nice review. If you didn’t like it...Hey, whaddyah expect from a two-headed turtle?!

BTW, I have been attempting to insert the book in conservative streams. I have tweeted it to various areas in twitter-land. If anyone has any good specific target marketing ideas, please pm me.

My goal was to create a story that was wholesome,;without witches, vampires, lust, and normalized perversion.

I hope I haven’t crossed forum boundaries with such self-promotion. If so, I apologize in advance.

[melsec]

Yes or if a female they were probably interfered with by their father or a similar male authority figure or were without a father at all but abused by other males!

Mel