Morocco offers US monkeys to detonate land mines

United Press International via COMTEX ^ | 3-24-03

[Oldeconomybuyer]

RABAT, D.C., Morocco, Mar 24, 2003 (United Press International via COMTEX) -- A Moroccan publication accused the government Monday of providing unusual assistance to U.S. troops fighting in Iraq by offering them 2,000 monkeys trained in detonating land mines.

The weekly al-Usbu' al-Siyassi reported that Morocco offered the U.S. forces a large number of monkeys, some from Morocco's Atlas Mountains and others imported, to use them for detonating land mines planted by the Iraqis.

The publication quoted a highly-informed source as saying, "that is not a scientific illusion but a well-known military tactic."

[sharktrager]

Are these Shiite or Sunni monkies? I think we need to find out. We don't want the monkies turning on us.

[Ronaldus Magnus]

I'm skeptical. Assuming that they are leashed to prevent them from fleeing back to Africa, one explosion and the remaining monkeys would in one whimpering huddle for the next two weeks.

[jriemer]

[discostu]

Things like this make me feel really sorry for the protocol officer. How in blazes do you politely decline mine-clearing monkeys?

[Porterville]

Can we use dolphins too???

[Porterville]

[mhking]

"Hold muh beer 'n watch this!" PING....

If you want on or off this list, please let me know!

[flying Elvis]

Ballistic kitties work better: http://www.studmonkeyracing.com/v2/vids/vidpagecat.html

[flying Elvis]

btt

[Dog Gone]

"Let's clear some landmines!"

[RightWhale]

2,000 monkeys trained in detonating land mines.

With years of experience?

[xm177e2]

Maybe we could get Iran to donate some "Children of the Keys" to clear out the land mines.

[Sofa King]

"If the Moroccan Monkeys don't work, maybe Michael Moore will volunteer ."

Maybe we can dupe some of those human sheilds into doing it-

"Alright, right over there would be a good place to stand if you want to protect Iraqi civilians..."

[small voice in the wilderness]

Which is exactly why we need a protocol officer with guts. Or we're going to end up with maimed monkeys. Tails blown off, unable to rollerskate.

[A CA Guy]

PETA is not going to like this. Monkey shields...

[pttttt]

Did this guy have anything to do with it?

Man Sentenced For Monkeys In Pants

[AdA$tra]

Doesn't that paint a rather humorous image in my mind.

[Blood of Tyrants]

Who cares if he volunteers or not? I say we tie a rope to his ankle, put him on a human sized catapult, and launch him into the mine field. If he isn't blown up immediately, you can't win every time, drag him back and try again.

[eddie willers]

Good one!

[MrJingles]

If this monkey business doesn't work, we'll try gorilla warfare.

*Applause*