Posted on 05/03/2003 4:20:11 PM PDT by PJ-Comix
I need some Anger Management. Why? Because I feel a hell of a lot of RAGE at all the movie critics who slammed Anger Management. It almost caused me to avoid this movie. Instead I disregarded the movie critics' commentaries and went to see Anger Management. It turned out to be the FUNNIEST movie I've seen in years. I laughed my ass off!
However, even though I am a former vice president of the United States, the movie companies don't invite me out to the premiers and yet I will still allow them to use the previous quote in their promos. Hey, here is an even better quote: "I laughed so hard that I pissed in my pants!"
So can I now get my free travel, hotel and buffet dinners for the premier parties? Why am I not hearing an answer? I give you great quotes to use in your advertising and all I get is ignored. It's making me really ANGRY! Better call Dr. Buddy Rydell to work as my Anger Management therapist. On the other hand, having seen this movie, maybe you better hold off on sending me that particular therapist as hilariously portrayed by Jack Nicholson in this movie. Oh, and while we're at it, please forget about assigning Chuck (John Turturro) as my Anger Ally. I don't think I could take his uncontrollable rage which started when he saw endless scenes of horrible jungle warfare as a veteran of… Grenada.
So how could such a funny movie be so unpopular with so many critics? Although many critics won't admit the source of their animosity towards Anger Managment, the most likely reason is that this movie has several very Politically Incorrect moments. Primarily these involve the scenes of the swishy gay Latino (Lou as played by Luis Guzman) and the German drag queen portrayed by Woody Harrelson in a big change of pace for him.
Maybe the uptight critics find these portrayals to be "insensitive" but the rest of us find them to be extremely funny. To see the shy, timid Dave Buznik (Adam Sandler) ordered by his wacky Anger Management therapist to get into the back seat of his car with a streetwalking German drag queen is FUNNY to everybody except those worried about Political Incorrectness. The latter category seems to include way too many film critics, especially that tub of lard, Roger Ebert, who could hardly contain his contempt for this movie. Hey, if I were still running for office I would probably be denouncing Anger Management as well but since I am now a lowly movie critic, I can be honest about this movie and tell you the TRUTH about this hilarious comedy.
In addition to the PC movie critics, many schoolteachers and college professors will also hate Anger Management. After all, they have spent a lot of effort trying to convince their pupils that folks with "alternative lifestyles" should be accepted as normal and definitely NOT mocked. Then along comes Anger Management to acknowledge what most of us already know: sitting in the backseat of a car with a flaunting drag queen is a very uncomfortable experience. All those years of intensive "diversity acceptance" training are hilariously overturned by Anger Management.
Another shattered icon in Anger Management is Buddhism. Have you ever noticed how on college campuses it is perfectly acceptable to openly mock most organized religions but somehow it is considered a major sacrilege to make fun of Buddhism? Well, Anger Management dares to laugh at the pretentious self-seriousness of Buddhism in such a way as to make our biggest Buddhist celebrity, Richard Gere, squirm as if he were full of a dozen hyperactive gerbils. As Buddy Rydell said at the Buddhist monastery, how can you worship some 600-pound fat guy who moralizes about self- control? This loud observation by Rydell (preceded by other similar taunts) causes the peaceful Buddhist monks to totally lose their own self- control and angrily chase after Buddy and Dave. The sight of a horde of bald, orange-robed monks screaming and cursing while in pursuit of the duo is yet another great laugh in Anger Management.
By the way, if you think the Buddhist monastery looked too plush in the movie, think again. In real life Buddhist monasteries and temples are incredibly ornate affairs. Did you take a good look at that Buddhist temple in California where the humble Buddhist monks donated a few hundred thousand bucks to my presidential campaign? A better description of that edifice would be "palace." And just where do the Buddhist monks get all that money? Do they go to the local flea markets and sell karmas at five bucks a pop? This is one of the eternal mysteries of the universe. Maybe Buddha himself gets royalty payments from the sale of all those green jade figurines of him squatting.
Anger Management kicks to life after a brief prologue that shows Dave Buznik as a child and what made him so shy and mild-mannered. Fast-forward twenty-five years and almost from the moment that the adult Buznik boards a passenger jet, Anger Management becomes a series of nearly uninterrupted laughs. And I don't mean minor chuckling type laughs. Anger Management will frequently CONVULSE you with such loud uncontrollable laughter that you will have a hard time keeping yourself from falling out of your seat.
Who among us can't identify with Buznik as he fruitlessly tries to get a preoccupied stewardess (or "flight attendant" as is insisted) to bring him a set of headphones so he can listen to the in- flight movie? After several failed attempts, Buznik give a very light tap on the stewardess's (oops, I mean "flight attendant's") arm as a gentle reminder. Unfortunately for Buznik, the flight attendant (see, I'm learning PC talk) treats the light tap as a major assault and the next thing we know poor Dave is zapped with a stun gun to "subdue" him, fined $3500 by a judge for his "assault," and ordered to attend 20 hours of an Anger Management workshop.
The good news for Dave is that the director of the Anger Management workshop was the passenger sitting next to him on the plane, Dr. Buddy Rydell who hints to Dave that he will allow him to attend just one therapy session and give him credit for the whole 20 hours. The bad news is that Dr. Rydell, after the extremely disturbing session decides to DOUBLE Dave's Anger Therapy program to 40 hours. And the even WORSE news is that the court later orders Dr. Rydell to stay with Dave 24/7 for intensive Anger Management therapy. Dave doesn't realize that Dr. Rydell has to remain with him around the clock full time until bedtime when, due to the fact that Dave has only one bed, Rydell crawls in under the sheets with Dave. Dave's discomfort at sharing his bed with a guy is made even worse when Dr. Rydell wiggles a bit under the sheet, pulls out his underpants, and informs Dave that he likes to sleep in the nude.
I won't go into too many more details as to the laugh scenes in Anger Management so as not to spoil the surprises (including a VERY risqué line uttered by Rudolph Guiliani playing himself). However, I just have to tell you about the scene on the Queensboro Bridge as Dave drives quickly to get to his job designing sweaters for fat cats (feline, not human fat cats). Suddenly Dr. Rydell grabs the emergency brake and brings the car to a screeching halt while cars stuck behind them on the bridge angrily blast their horns after almost crashing into Dave's car. In the midst of this mayhem, Dr. Rydell pulls out the lyrics to "I Feel Pretty" from The West Side Story and forces Dave to not only sing them but to sing them with anger-free happiness as a lesson in Anger Management. A little tough to do when you're late for work stuck on the middle of a bridge with angry commuters behind you cursing you out.
I found Anger Management to be almost nonstop laughs which is what a successful comedy should be plus it was a great subject matter to satirize. As a result, on my Chad Rating Scale of one to ten chads with ten chads being best, I give Anger Management a PERFECT ten chads for being absolutely HILARIOUS!
This is the NEW Al Gore keepin' it real with this review but still feeling a lot of ANGER at those hillbillies I evicted from my rental home in 2000 who, as a result of the bad publicity from the eviction, cost me my home state and the presidency. Therefore let me sign off with this little song:
I feel pretty,
Oh, so pretty,
I feel pretty and witty and bright!
And I pity
Any girl who isn't me tonight.
I feel charming,
Oh, so charming
It's alarming how charming I feel!
And so pretty
That I hardly can believe I'm real.
See the pretty girl in that mirror there:
Who can that attractive girl be?
Such a pretty face,
Such a pretty dress,
Such a pretty smile,
Such a pretty me!
I feel stunning
And entrancing,
Feel like running and dancing for joy,
For I'm loved
By a pretty wonderful boy!
I guess it's all a matter of perspective. Some folks even got offended by Chicago so I guess there is something in every movie to offend somebody out there.
So this means you didn't like it?
That's a fair conclusion.
Bad acting. Lame humor (and normally my standards are prettly low in this department, but this movie managed to insult even these low standards--the humor just didn't work). Poor plot.
"Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how was the play?"
Hahahahaha! I didn't mean the golfer. (I always do that. My brain doesn't handle names well. I'd make a lousy politician.)
Of course, all you have to do to see my neighborhood is rent Saturday Night Fever. Can we get Al Gore to review that classic?
That would be the last score of the late Bernard Herrman, who composed the score in many cases from his bed. He died before the movie was released.
Times Square and the East Village (where most of the movie was filmed) have cleaned up considerably since then. For sleaze these days, I guess you have to cruise Oakland Park or Biscayne Boulevards!
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.