WATER SPORT (Horny Dolphin Molests Demi Moore - Kutcher Watches In Horror)

NY Post ^ | July 22, 2003 | Dick Johnson

[presidio9]

DEMI Moore is accustomed to the attentions of men - but not an over-sexed porpoise. Moore, her beau Ashton Kutcher, ex-hubby Bruce Willis and kids Talluleh, Scout and Rumer were all in Las Vegas to catch the Duran Duran show at the Hard Rock Hotel's venue, the Joint. Sunday morning, the crew went to see Siegfried & Roy's Secret Garden & Dolphin Habitat, and took a swim with the flippery mammals. "Dolphins are very sexually aggressive, and one went after Demi in a big way," laughed our spy. Moore had to get out of the pool.

[SpinnerWebb]

Now, where did I put my dolphin suit........

[Zavien Doombringer]

I'm sorry, I need to give it back to you. I should tell you what a great time I had in Vegas with it!

[Lunatic Fringe]

[Semper Paratus]

When did Demi start dating pro football players?

[b4its2late]

Dick Johnson wrote this? Hmmm.

[BostonCajun]

I don't know....Sounds kinda "fishy" to me!

[KantianBurke]

Moore, her beau Ashton Kutcher, ex-hubby Bruce Willis and kids Talluleh, Scout and Rumer were all in Las Vegas to catch the Duran Duran show at the Hard Rock Hotel's venue

I'm sorry but this struck me as the REAL oddity of the article.

[GodBlessRonaldReagan]

There's a King of the Hill episode dealing with the same topic - it's hilarious!

[presidio9]

Actually he does go by Richard. Dick is just a nickname I use for him.

[ko_kyi]

That has to be the best headline since "William Shatner's wife dissatisfied with frozen horse sperm"

[Tax-chick]

Moore, her beau Ashton Kutcher, ex-hubby Bruce Willis and kids Talluleh, Scout and Rumer

Just the modern American family ... you got problems with that? (/sarcasm)

[Xenalyte]

Isn't Ashton like half her age?

[Lunatic Fringe]

more like 1/3 of her age

[Xenalyte]

Oh, y'all don't want Demi. Her hoots display as much motion as concrete.

[Xenalyte]

Blech!

[Lunatic Fringe]

She was born in 1962, he was born in 1978. So... a 14-year difference. Guess 1/3 was a bit of an exaggeration.

[Zavien Doombringer]

And as slippery as the dolphin :)

[Larry Lucido]

Is that a gun in your snout, or are you just happy to see me?

[presidio9]

I'm sorry, I need to give it back to you. I should tell you what a great time I had in Vegas with it!

After you finish waxing it, that is.

[Diogenesis]

And as slippery as the dolphin :)

And then some.

[presidio9]

Is that a gun in your snout, or are you just happy to see me?

No, that would be "the friendly finger," you're talking about. Man I wish I could find THAT article!

[jetson]

I think I see a movie here. "Debbie does the dolphins."

[Zavien Doombringer]

[Zavien Doombringer]

Did you look at the keywords list?

[finnman69]

[Redcloak]

Her hoots display as much motion as concrete.

You may be onto something there. Perhaps Demi simply presented an interesting sonar picture to the animal.

[SpinnerWebb]

Scratch that dolphin suit.... http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/950559/posts?page=15

[tnlibertarian]

16

[tlb]

When last heard from, Demi was heard to mutter something about searching for Moby Dick.

[bigj00]

Shouldn't that be "Demi does the dolphins"?

[WestPacSailor]

Thar she blows!

[presidio9]

Reminds me of Beaks in the gorilla suit at the end of Trading Places.

[NeoCaveman]

One for your ping list mh.

[Mike Darancette]

"Dolphins are very sexually aggressive, and one went after Demi in a big way,"

Dolphins are very intelligent and have great eyesight.

[NeoCaveman]

I heard that dolphin just signed a contract with the Lakers.

Just kidding!

[Renegade]

Demi had a SEAL of approval.

[WestPacSailor]

I guess she's FINished swimming with dolphins for a while, eh?

[mhking]

Did someone say Dolphins?

HMB/Bizarre PING....

If you want on or off this list, FReepmail me!

FYI: This has fast outgrown it's original "charter" and become a home for the truly bizarre. An alternative saying/phrasiology is being sought (and suggestions are very welcome!). Also, like it's "cousin list" the B/C list, it has become a high-volume list.

---

I'm leaning toward "Just damn," on the suggestion of quite a few folks. I won't make a decision until Sunday. (And thanks to all of you for sending your suggestions!)

[bedolido]

I forget is a dolphin the mammal or the porpie (plural for porposus porpsis hmmmmmmm The other dolphin.

Whichever, I understand the thinking... as long as she didn't have that shaved head she sported in GI-Jane.

[presidio9]

Gives new meaning to the term "sleeping with the fishes..."

[wasp69]

Wouldn't this be a "hold muh bottlenose" alert?

[Blood of Tyrants]

BUSTED! Dolphins aren't fish!

[jpl]

They're small whales. Amazing creatures, the only other animal besides the dog and cat that has somehow managed to form a special bond with mankind.

[Freebird Forever]

I didn't know that dolphins liked tuna.

[Blood of Tyrants]

Seems like he was trying to "bond" with Demi.

[honeygrl]

"I'm sorry but this struck me as the REAL oddity of the article."

According to the photos in the tabloids every week, she and her ex hubby are really good friends still and he hangs out with her and the kids even when she has a new boyfriend.

[bedolido]

you know the old saying about woman and fish... maybe that's why the dolphin went after her.

[thegreatbeast]

I've seen footage of an amorous dolphin going after a human being. Not funny at all. They are big, powerful animals.

[weegee]

This isn't the first time I've heard about horny dolphins. I know a woman who was "hooked" by an amorous dolphin out at sea. She was being dragged underwater in her wetsuit while her family laughed at her predicament.