Posted on 03/17/2014 2:43:57 AM PDT by markomalley
And actually, “dating” was a step down from going out with a chaperone, or meeting in the parlor. Yes, it was a better way, especially when hormones have the upper hand.
So far my girls have stuck to dating. Another benefit of dating is that breakups are less painful.
I wish I had followed that approach in my teen years, but dating was passe even in the 70s.
what is that picture on your page
Hmmm...maybe too much of a good thing for the ladies?
I so agree! Supervised group events and outings are another good venue. Really, the automobile may be as much to blame as the pill. Modern communications will probably never be reeled back in again, but in-person supervision in youth should be ramped way up, IMO.
Yes, the young men in my family have all been that way on campus too! They are in the minority and I think it is a combination of having less-roving genes and being raised under the moral example of men who likewise have less cad in them.
The holding out for Catholic marriage is probably less common, and most such marriage-material college men seem to end up in exclusive relationships with the very lucky minority of women on campus who manage to attract them. The majority of women are left scrambling in and too often falling prey to the modern hookup culture that especially favors men when both gay men and the exclusive-dater men are taken out of the equation.
Sigh.
The older one's dating experiences have mostly been really bad (sometimes downright strange, like the girl who invited him home to meet her parents, then treated him like a pariah from the moment she picked him up at the airport ?!?), and I think he really doesn't have much enthusiasm left for the dating process.
The other one is a freshman bball player at a small Catholic college. Sweet boy, smart, wants to be a doctor. He doesn't talk about dating much, but if there were someone very special in his life, we'd know about it.
It's sad. This generation seems to have a real problem forming real relationships -- girls just as much as boys.
Why so she can spend a few years with him and then change her mind and get half his money for the next 20 years.
This bible says it is better to stay single if possible.
Parents stopped parenting and became the kids’ friends instead.
A couple of thoughts, first, you need a job to finance a date. Second why pay for a meal when what you want is given away for free. Kids don’t relate face to face much anymore. If you aren’t sexually immoral, a young person is likely to be put at severe temptation when alone with a typical person without such scruples.
I have two sons, 21 & 16. They don’t date either. The girls seem to be either really sexually aggressive or don’t value men.
This includes church girls. Those that aren’t super aggressive are apparently dating Jesus. This is a southern baptist but even there the feminazi’s have had their effect.
Parenting is important of course. Parents have been slacking for years though and not just this generation. ‘Parents’ have also allowed the destruction of our culture and morals.
Get this -- my son's best friend at college -- sweet guy, kind & gentle, *rich* family, and an athlete good enough to come within sniffing distance of the national championship in his sport -- he couldn't get a date either! Women were even nasty about turning him down. What gives??
Well, it takes two to tango. So, no matter how ready your son might be, he does need a worthwhile counterpart.
All I can say is, don't give up! Keep looking for and asking out young ladies who appear eligible! Enjoy the company of those who are nice but not quite right, and gather up as good story-telling the material the ones who are less enjoyable!
My son had first dates with some considerable number of young ladies his freshman year. But I don't recall ever hearing about a second date with any of them. He threw a lot of fish back into the sea. Perhaps he benefited from uniformly low expectations. He had a nice enough time with some of them, but didn't expect much, and though a few of the ladies seemed to welcome a second date, he wasn't sufficiently motivated to follow through with any of them.
But, since everyone knew the rules upfront, since everyone knew he/she would be sleeping alone that night after the date, that there was no chance of anything beyond an invitation for a second date, there was no pressure, and my son enjoyed a lot of these dates, even though they ultimately went nowhere. Even, I think, with the goofier young ladies.
I think he also benefits being at a large, secular college in a substantial metropolitan area with a lot of large (and smaller) colleges. Ironically, he has dated few, if any, Catholic girls. He reports to me that most of them are pretty scary.
“This generation seems to have a real problem forming real relationships — girls just as much as boys.”
I agree. My son benefits from having little fear of rejection, and from having little regard for other folks’ social conventions.
sitetest
“Because the bible says, regarding those who are the object of our passion, “it is better to marry.””
Just “better”? Not the ringing endorsement I would have expected.
“Because the bible says, regarding those who are the object of our passion, ‘it is better to marry.’”
So true. That’s why you do the best you can to make sure the the “object of your passion” is a decent person from the get-go. Then marry. Sometimes that’s not possible to find all necessary information, but you do your best.
The bible also advocates the “best” being full commitment to a life in service to Christ. So marrying becomes the “better” rather than the best.
BINGO!!!
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