Vanity: Physicist and Mrs. Physicist Had a Son Today

Mrs. Physicist, with my invaluable assistance | November 16, 2001 | self

[Physicist]

I am pleased--irrationally exuberant, in fact--to announce the birth of my son today.

Jacob David Sterner was born by caesarean section at 1:41 PM EST today at Riddle Memorial Hospital in Media, PA. He weighed 6 lbs. 11 oz., and was 19.25 inches long. Jake and Mrs. Physicist came through the process in excellent health.

The surgery was performed by Dr. Mark Finnegan, who delivered our daughters Emily and Molly, also at Riddle, in 1995 and 1997, respectively.

Here is a bigger picture of Jake.

Here I am holding my boy.

To take this post into the stratosphere of vanity, I will inflict upon you a valedictory sonnet, which I penned today:

ATLAS

Jacob David Sterner, start your life!
Knight errant, leave the fortress of the womb,
Your country's been attacked, and all is strife,
Ten patriots exhort you from the tomb.

The fashion of the day is ignorance,
You'll have to think and learn, despite the japes,
And cover for your neighbor's indolence,
Your sweat will feed and clothe ungrateful apes.

Your father has affrontery enough,
To ask so much of one boy at his birth,
But know that you are made of Sterner stuff:
Your shoulders can accomodate the Earth.

To sire you was my duty, dearest son:
The world needs such a man as you'll become.

(The line about "ten patriots" refers to his ten ancestors who served in the Revolutionary War.)

[Physicist]

As a deist, I do not believe in the efficacy of prayer. In slightly more than six years, I have prayed in earnest three times, on the off-chance that anyone was listening. In each case, my prayer was exactly two words long:

THANK YOU.

[Physicist]

You've seen him. How'd your namesake look to you?

[3catsanadog]

Mega Congratulations!

[McGavin999]

Congratulations PaPa, you're going to be a wonderful father. A son! You must be so proud.

[dighton]

... made of Sterner stuff ...

Good one! Congratulations.

[Senator Pardek]

CONGRATS!!!

Vanity: Physicist and Mrs. Physicist Had a Son Today

Leave it to a scientist to find a strange and ungodly way to propogate.

[Mr. K]

Congrats, from one physicist to another!

[Bloody Sam Roberts]

What a good lookin' boy!

Congratulations!

[newzjunkey]

Congratulations to Jacob for making it this far.

[Jhensy]

And a handsome lad he is. Congrats!

[WIMom]

HAPPY BABY!

[LibKill]

Congratulations. May he follow you in genius.

[Physicist]

I should add that Mrs. Physicist made the candy-corn hat. I have photographs of her from today, but she browbeat me into not posting any of them.

[KayEyeDoubleDee]

Congratulations!!!

[kayak]

Ccongratulations to you and Mrs. P!!! He's an adorable baby ... and his sisters are beautiful.

And, yes, I can promise you that you were heard ...... He's always there listening.

[mafree]

Congratulations and thanks for the pics! The poem is good too. All of your kids are cute and I wish God's blessings on your whole family.

[beckett]

Heartiest congratulations.

[mdittmar]

CONGRATULATIONS!

[Registered]

Congrats! Just curious, but did your wife decide to go caesarean after you showed her your calculations regarding the force necessary to deliver the little lad?

[RightOnline]

Expand your vocabulary when thanking God, for He truly blessed you. That's a beautiful baby boy (take it from one who just had his seventh child, a son, a mere seven weeks ago), and I extend heartiest congratulations to you and the missus. :)