Skip to comments.Urban Legend Haiku
Posted on 01/17/2002 4:50:52 AM PST by LN2Campy
Haiku...Urban Legends -- two intermittently occuring topics on this esteemed forum. Why not combine them??
What's this on mirror?
"WELCOME TO THE WORLD OF AIDS!"
One night stand of DEATH!!
It's strange to awaken
In a bathtub full of ice.
HEY - where's my kidney!?!
"Speed trap" I flash them
As a helpful motorist
Only to get shot!!
OK, folks, knock yourselves out!!
Elvis has Cheeseburger,
Usama eats rings.
Be Seeing You,
The otters are mad.
Did you ever hunt for snipes?
And did you catch one?
Unless it was mail
Written just like a haiku
That's going too far.
Asian lady personal ads
this native is restless
gotta catch me one.
Did you ever hunt for snipes? And did you catch one?
No, but Snipe Hunting is an one of our family legends. Years ago, I drove our two sons on vacation from Kali to Oklahoma and up to Illinois to meet their Mom, my wife, for the next leg of the journey, she flew out later to join us in Illinois where her family lived.
The oldest son was 15 and grew about 5 inches on the trip. So he was just wanted to eat, sleep and grow and wasn't your typical teenager, and he presented no problem except feeding him about 5 times each day.
The younger son made up for it. He had just turned 13 and had become the devil's gift for 7 years instead of God's. He was a complete pain on the whole trip to Oklahoma, and while staying at relatives there he got worse. We took him snipe hunting to calm him down. It worked, and he was okay for about 5 days. He couldn't believe that we left him in the woods holding a gunny bag and whispering "Here Snipey!" About twenty minutes after the sunset, he realized what had happened and walked the 2 miles to our relatives's home.
Then, we drove to Illinois to meet Mom who flew out. He reverted to usual whining teeneager because she was there to protect him. On a very hot Illionois day, I took my sons and a car load of cousins swimming at a community pool about 5 miles from my wife's home.
My son got ejected from the pool for his behavior, and he was out of control on the trip back to his grandparents. I told him to control his mouth and to stand down or I would stop the car and leave him on the side of the road.
On hearing this, he and his mouth got even worse. I stopped the car and pulled him out. I told him that he was only about 4 miles from the little town in Illinois. He said that I wouldn't leave him and started mouthing. We all wave at him as we left him on the side of road. I can still remember what his eyes looked like as we drove off and left him by the side of the road.
He stayed there about 15 minutes in the hot Illinois sun waiting for Dad to return. Finally he began to walk to his home. About 40 minutes later, his mother and grandmother were driving back home after lunch and shopping. As they passed him, his grandmother yelled stop, "That's X walking on the road."
His mother stopped and he got into the car and started using his mouth again. She stopped the car and told him to shut up or get out. He couldn't believe it, and she said shut up or get out. He apologized and kept his mouth shut.
Later my wife and I discussed the "mouth", and she agreed that I had correct.
While in Illinois, we bought her brother's classic Camaro Convertible. This meant on the way back to Kali, we had two vehicles. My wife and the mouth drove in the same car most of the time and the oldest son and I drove in the other car. A great way to travel with teenagers.
Now this son loves to tell this story as an example of great parenting by his Dad during the teenager years.
So Snipe hunting holds a treasure of memories for our family.
The correct snipe call
is, "Snipe, Snipe, Snipe!" "Snipe, Snipe, Snipe!"
Stick to fly fishing!
(No urban legend
haiku thread can be without
a rural legend!)
A lot of people still believe this U.L.
A beautiful, nice
Asian, Christian girl for you
I'm on the lookout.
230 posted on 1/29/02 11:50 AM Pacific by Prodigal Daughter
I am truly LOL!
Friend at ER Help!
Sick Heart Attack - stroke? NO!
Ate son's pot brownies.