You Know You Are A Freeper When.....

April 13, 2004 | LadyShallott

[LadyShallott]

You Know You Are A Freeper When......

You have family members post for you because you have lost all sensation in your right hand from to much mouse usage.

You aren't sure what this "daylight" thing is, but you know you haven't seen it since 1998.

You seriously think about ramming the car in front of you when you see a liberal bumper sticker.

You spend your time finding pictures of John Kerry & morph him into a two-headed ketchup alien.

You try to figure out a way to write a program that would allow you to make love with your spouse and read the breaking news at the same time.

When you and your spouse get into an argument it comes out "Removed by Admin. Moderator".

You asked for a wireless connection at your baby shower. Who needs a baby monitor? Watching the baby and posting is just FR practicality.

You have picked out not only your child’s name, but their screen name for future use at Free Republic.

You told your spouse you were pregnant by listing it under “Breaking News”.

You have shunned the Atkins Diet and chosen to go on the “Freeper” diet: Coffee, smokes, and target practice.

You want to sit in a cage at a PETA rally while smoking, eating a hamburger, drinking coffee and hand out Free Republic coffee mugs.

And last but not least……..

You know you are a married to a Freeper when you can talk about anything going on in the world, you display the American Flag with pride, and you pray for the Troops defending this great country. Chance 33_98, I love ya!

[RosieCotton]

You misspelled "seriesly". ;-)

[chance33_98]

You know you're a freeper when you say more to your spouse on FR threads than you do when you're at home with her :)

[LadyShallott]

Hey! I think we resemble that remark..I mean..of course we don't do that. :)

[al baby]

You Know your a freeper when you wake up in the middle of the night and its not your prostate you just want to check breaking news to see whats up

[codyjacksmom]

Sometimes too addictive. My 11 yr old daughter is constantly mad at me too. The computer was her Christmas present and it's in her room. Ohhhhh, the homeland wars we have!!!! LOL

[RosieCotton]

Or when (and I suppose I shouldn't admit this), you sit at the computer long after when you should be in bed, saying to yourself "I'll just hit refresh FOUR more times...then I'm going to bed. Really. Just...OK, maybe FIVE more times..."

[Joe 6-pack]

[theFIRMbss]

>You Know You Are A Freeper When .....

... characters out of the Wizard of Oz become political things . . .

[LadyShallott]

We solved that problem with four computers. I live with a computer geek who brings home computers every other month. Freep mail him. We have computers sitting in the closet. LOL. A multiple Freeper household is bliss. :)

[netmilsmom]

Great LIST!!
I loved Chance's too and tried posting to it but it didn't take. I tried to add...
"You know you are married to a FReeper when your wife says she couldn't get the laundry done or make dinner because Dog posted a Breaking News story on Iraq then you run to catch up on the 1000 posts."
(That has happened here twice)

>>You seriously think about ramming the car in front of you when you see a liberal bumper sticker.<<

This is a true story. One of the teachers at my daughter's charter school had a jeep covered with liberal bumperstickers. The spare tire had a cover with a big smilie face. Everytime I saw the thing I wanted to barf.
When I decided to pull Net out to home school, I had already bought 5 bumperstickers from ProtestWarriors to stick all over the giant smilie as I left. Only Dad stopped me.

[dts32041]

I have misspelled a lot more words than "seriesly", and it has been correct in the dictionary yet, how about it jim spell checking with the way freepers write.

[netmilsmom]

FReeper Junior!!!!!!
I love it!
I registered Dad as Netmilsdad because another FReeper told me that a troll had registered as her name + "dad" and almost got her banned.

Think I should register Net & Mil????

[LadyShallott]

Or when (and I suppose I shouldn't admit this), you sit at the computer long after when you should be in bed, saying to yourself "I'll just hit refresh FOUR more times...then I'm going to bed. Really. Just...OK, maybe FIVE more times..."

So it's not just us. Time to get some sleep babe. LOL

[chance33_98]

We need a laptop in bed, I mean, people fall asleep reading books, why not FR?

[netmilsmom]

>>Actually...no. But who knows? I might just surprise him the second time. LOL<<

You have to promise to ping me!
I want to be the "Cyber-Godmother"

[codyjacksmom]

Oh how sweet that would be!!!! Does that mean I wouldn't ever have to talk to anyone face to face??? I can picture it now....just me, FR and FReepers. The ideal life.... LOL

[Dixie Pirate]

Wife and I were shopping for stuff the other day when a weird-looking little woman with a scowl on her face walked up wearing a "Kerry '04" shirt.

My wife knew I couldn't resist...

I looked at the woman quizzically and said, "Are you OK?".
She asked what I meant, to which I replied, "You're obviously fevered, or just hate our country. If you leave you'll feel better and so will I!

[netmilsmom]

Dad and I have separate laptops with wireless connections.
We can set you up....

[babyface00]

You watch the evening news only to discover you read about all the stories last week on FR, and you have a better grasp of the details than the news anchor does.

[Eagle Eye]

Wow. By those definitions I'm no Freeper because I have a life.

Damn.