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Michael Moore's works a travesty to documentaries
The Triangle/Student paper of Drexel University ^ | May 28 2004 | Aaron Sakulich

Posted on 06/13/2004 6:41:01 AM PDT by veronica

If you know someone who likes Michael Moore, you know someone who isn't as smart as they think they are. In fact, there's a pretty good chance that they're not even as smart as I think they are, and that says a lot, because I think they're flat-out stupid. In case you've been luckier than I have and don't know who Michael Moore is, he's a grotesque monster of a man who every few years puts out a documentary that people who consider themselves intellectual hail as brilliant.

Michael Moore's movies are nothing so much as they are dishonest. He's constantly saying things that seem intelligent, but on further examination, aren't. For instance, there's a scene in his documentary Bowling for Columbine in which he says to a man in a Lockheed Martin plant, "Columbine happened down the road from this missile factory. Don't you think there's a connection?" When he said this, I thought to myself, "My heavens, it's all so clear! There's a connection between nuclear weapons and the Trench Coat Mafia!" That is, until the guy to whom the question was posed looked at Michael Moore as if he'd just vomited a live snake onto the floor and said, "Not really. We make nuclear weapons to prevent the Soviets from attacking us, and down the road, some kids went insane and shot up a bunch of innocent people."

Every single scene in Michael Moore's films are like this. They seem to be intelligent; they seem to reveal some deep inner truth, but after a few moments of scrutiny, they fall apart. If you've ever taken an organic chemistry class, you know that there's always a guy who sits up front and looks like he knows everything. You also know there's a difference between looking like you know everything and actually knowing everything. Michael Moore is an expert at looking intelligent, not at being intelligent.

Or take, for instance, the statistics Moore uses in Bowling for Columbine. Toward the middle of the movie, the number of gun-related deaths per country flashes across the screen, and because America's is highest, Moore concludes we're all pistol-packing racists. He doesn't, however, mention any of the circumstances from which the numbers come. For instance, in China most policemen are allowed to kill whoever they want for any infraction of the law without a trial. So, technically, every time a person is killed with a firearm, it's an "execution" and not a "murder." Yet according to Moore, China is a safer place than America, because China has zero gun-related murders a year.

These are just two examples of Michael Moore's modus operandi - take some facts and twist, twist, twist and twist them until they resemble what you want them to resemble. It's a shame he's so fond of making films, for he could probably build an origami space shuttle with his twisting and building skills.

In all fairness, however, my opinion could be wrong. Perhaps Moore is right, and something connects Klebold and Harris with Oppenheimer and Von Braun. Even if that's true, he's still a liar. In his book Stupid White Men, Moore recollects a conversation he had with a man named Fred Barnes. Moore said that Barnes had been on The McLaughlin Group complaining that American students don't know what the Iliad and Odyssey are, but when Moore called and put that question to him, Barnes didn't know either. Fred Barnes is an hypocrite, case closed, right? Not quite. The problem is that this conversation, which Michael Moore claims occurred, did not happen. It's all a fat, stinking lie. Fred Barnes claims it never happened, and although Moore's book has plenty of footnotes and source references, there isn't one for the "conversation" he had with Fred Barnes. That's because it's hard to cite something that never happened. As another example, Michael Moore claimed that Disney told him the day before his latest film, Fahrenheit 9/11, was to open, that they weren't going to allow it to be distributed. Moore claimed in the New York Times that he'd been told the reason was because Disney doesn't want to bad-mouth the brother of Florida Gov. Jeb Bush, who gives Disney substantial amounts of cash every year. Both of these are flat-out lies.

Disney told Moore about the distribution over a year ago. He made these insane claims to try to make it look like "The Man" was trying to silence him. Although he was told that the reason Disney wouldn't distribute it is because of Jeb Bush, he was told that by his agent's brother's pool cleaner or someone, and he was just repeating a rumor he heard. That hardly classifies as true.

If Moore's not above lying directly to the public about things like this in a pitiful effort to drive up sales, what makes the public think that he won't tell them lies in his "documentaries"? No matter what the crowd at Cannes says, his works are terrible to the point of frustrating my attempts to describe how bad they are. You may have heard he won an award recently at the Cannes Film Festival. Somehow, I don't suspect the judges were talking about the subtle use of shadow and contrast, the almost Kafkaesque use of symbology reminiscent of Pynchon's early works during the scene in which Moore talks about how President Bush's library burned down and he wasn't even done coloring all the books when they chose to give him the award. They probably just looked up from the checks they were about to make out to the genocidal madman, Yasir Arafat, saw an unhappy fat man whining about America and unanimously decided to hand over the prize.

Moore is certainly not an artistic genius. The only technical requirement for a documentary is that it isn't blurry, and he's certainly not a documentary-making genius, since it's easy to make documentaries when you cook the data, show one side of the argument and make up lies.

Sometime in the near future, someone is going to tell me that I'm wrong and Michael Moore is the greatest artistic genius ever to walk the face of the earth. Their logic will run along the lines of, "Since you've never made a movie, what right have you to criticize his films?" I may not have made any films, but if I eat at a restaurant and get food poisoning, I don't need to be a five-star chef to complain.

The fact of the matter is this: If you think Michael Moore is fine intellectual fare, you're not thinking enough when you watch his films. If you actually pay to see his movie, which is to say you give someone money to lie to you, I urge you in the strongest possible terms to get a vasectomy, because the world has enough idiots.


TOPICS: Crime/Corruption; Culture/Society; Editorial
KEYWORDS: bowlingforcolumbine; documentary; michaelmoore
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To: not_apathetic_anymore
Geez, you mean you didn't sue her and the school district for being mean to you?

I guess she wasn't sensitive to the the damage she was doing to my self-esteem. ***Sniff***

41 posted on 06/13/2004 9:41:49 AM PDT by OSHA (I refuse to be called uncooperative.)
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To: veronica

Michael 'the liar' Moore...along with his fellow Hollywood liars...was given an award for lying....
why should this be surprising...?

The greater the lie and the more rabidly Anti American the bigger the award....

Moore is a hero to them.....not because he is a 'great arteest' but because he is a shameless
liar...and rabidly Anti American...

He should have been 'awarded' a scarlet AA to wear around his fat neck

imo


42 posted on 06/13/2004 9:43:33 AM PDT by joesnuffy (Moderate Islam Is For Dilettantes)
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To: NYCVirago
And he's also rumored to be the real writer of "To Kill a Mockingbird."

The character Dill, in To Kill A Mockingbird, is based on Capote, though.

43 posted on 06/13/2004 9:45:35 AM PDT by veronica (Viva la Reagan revolution....)
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To: joesnuffy

Michael Moore's lies and mis-characterizations are to 'documentaries' what the work of Joseph Goebels was to Nazi Germany ... pure deceit-filled propaganda.


44 posted on 06/13/2004 9:46:20 AM PDT by MHGinTN (If you can read this, you've had life support from someone. Promote life support for others.)
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To: DustyMoment

Ebert and Roeper gave it two thumbs up. Ebert said he agrees completely with F911's political message. Can't say I'm surprised.


45 posted on 06/13/2004 9:56:05 AM PDT by glaux
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Comment #46 Removed by Moderator

To: veronica
A great book on Capote, that covers that rivalry, (between Capote and Harper Lee) - is Capote, by Gerald Clarke. Unusually fine biography. I don't believe it rumor by the way. But Capote was very annoyed that his life-long friend made such a splash with Mockingbird, which became an instant American classic.

Thanks for the info. I'll have to check out that book -- I really enjoyed Clarke's book on Judy Garland.

47 posted on 06/13/2004 10:54:25 AM PDT by NYCVirago
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To: Diamondhead

Long time no see.

How about those Cassini photos?


48 posted on 06/13/2004 11:12:38 AM PDT by Ben Hecks
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To: OSHA

I am glad that you enjoyed the phrase "feckless crapweasel." It contains two of my favourite verbal arrows in one tidy package. Also, you will find that, when spoken, it rolls off the tongue rather nicely.
Cheers,

AAC


49 posted on 06/13/2004 12:19:44 PM PDT by Army Air Corps (Ronald Reagan - The first anti-terror President.)
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To: Ben Hecks

Your last statement on that post is funny and creepy on a multitude of levels.


50 posted on 06/13/2004 12:22:15 PM PDT by Army Air Corps (Ronald Reagan - The first anti-terror President.)
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To: jocon307

51 posted on 06/13/2004 12:28:24 PM PDT by Boazo (Are you afraid of clowns?)
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To: pepsionice
Looks like the diet is going well
52 posted on 06/13/2004 12:34:32 PM PDT by Boazo (Are you afraid of clowns?)
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To: veronica

53 posted on 06/13/2004 12:42:32 PM PDT by Boazo (Are you afraid of clowns?)
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To: Ben Hecks

Awesome photos. Hope the rest of the mission goes as well.
Lots of water under the dam since MMC.


54 posted on 06/13/2004 12:54:56 PM PDT by Diamondhead
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To: RiteWingWacko
There's actually a book, "The Hipster's Handbook", which breaks down the taxonomy for every species of leftist blowhard known to mankind.

I'm pretty sure Moore fits under the category of 'stultus maximus', which is not limited to East Coast, hackey-sack playing girlie men.

The most distinguishing characteristics of this group are:

-hirsute, disheveled look,

-command of obscure and often pointless facts, which are marshaled against their opponent's coherently arranged and cogent arguments, which are often dismissed as either "irrational" or "hateful",

and finally,

-a disgustingly bloated torso that comes from years of sitting on his or her ass, watching ridiculous, taxpayer subsidized programs on public broadcasting.

55 posted on 06/13/2004 3:04:49 PM PDT by The Scourge of Yazid ("It's time for the 'Stiffmeister' to boom-boom with the bridesmaids.")
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To: alloysteel
eeeee-gads! Oh no, no, no...when I think of "mocumentaries", I think of those films created by Christopher Guest, et al that are presented up front as being fictional and for pure entertainment value.

Best in Show
Waiting for Guffman
A Mighty Wind
[[not my personal favorite]]

I DO like the idea of categorizing Moore's films as "foc-u-mentaries" though...good one!
56 posted on 06/13/2004 7:26:14 PM PDT by poo
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To: veronica

LOL! "If you actually pay to see his movie, which is to say you give someone money to lie to you, I urge you in the strongest possible terms to get a vasectomy, because the world has enough idiots."


57 posted on 06/23/2004 8:28:54 PM PDT by Roberts
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