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Can men respect women if they're trained to be perverts?
WorldNetDaily ^ | 10/18/04 | Rabbi Shmuley Boteach

Posted on 10/18/2004 6:43:11 PM PDT by wagglebee

In a culture that sexualizes women constantly, the line between water-cooler chat and harassment is increasingly thin.

Bill O'Reilly, the conservative talk-show host whose "The O'Reilly Factor" is the highest-rated cable news show, has been sued for sexual harassment by his former producer Andrea Mackris. Mackris alleges that on many occasions, both in person and over the phone, O'Reilly engaged in lewd and lascivious conversation against her will. She goes so far as to state that O'Reilly unlawfully engaged in, and gratified himself with, phone sex, with Mackris on the other end of the line.

To be sure, O'Reilly enjoys the presumption of innocence in the suit, until proven otherwise. I personally respect and greatly enjoy O'Reilly as a broadcaster and I am sorry to see his public standing undermined by these allegations. While some of the content of Mackris' affidavit seems possible, readers of it will discover that other parts seem directed squarely at Roger Ailes, the chairman of the Fox News Channel, thereby undermining her credibility. Furthermore, Mackris does not explain why she didn't just hang up when O'Reilly allegedly harassed her repeatedly over the telephone.

Be that as it may, this sordid and sorry tale brings to the fore all that is wrong with our increasingly perverse culture. The question that the growing phenomenon of sexual harassment in the workplace raises is this: Can we really expect to have a healthy office environment, where men treat women as colleagues and intellectual equals, when everywhere else in the culture women are being so completely sexualized?

Is it realistic to ask men to separate what they see on television and in magazines from their interactions with women in the boardroom? With men being deluged in virtually every electronic medium with the message that women want to be recognized for their bodies rather than their brains, is it reasonable to expect that men will suddenly think differently the moment a woman dons a business suit?

Never in history have women been so sexually exploited as they are today.

College girls expose their breasts in exchange for a T-shirt on the "Girls Gone Wild" videos. MTV has transformed the women's music industry away from an emphasis on vocals and toward an emphasis of cleavage. Posters of Victoria's Secret models, dressed in thongs and the most revealing lingerie, line our mains thoroughfares, billboards and buses. Are men really expected to shut all this off the moment they stand in front of a copy machine?

Can we really expect a pure office environment to emerge from a degenerate culture? Indeed, in an environment where everything from the Internet to sporting events is sexualized, it even becomes difficult to determine what exactly constitutes harassment in the work place.

Let's see. If a man watches "Sex and the City" and, knowing that his female colleagues love the show, mentions at the water cooler how much he enjoyed the previous night's episode of Samantha giving a stranger oral sex, is it harassment? Or is it small talk?

And let's say a boss comes into the office after watching the Super Bowl and asks his secretary if she saw Janet Jackson's breast pop out during the half-time show, is he making lewd and inappropriate comments? What if a guy sees some new movie about sex and comments on the nude love scene – is that harassment? And if it is, can we at least recognize that we have made a huge portion of American culture off-limits in the workplace, because of how perversely sexualized it has become?

So that I am not misunderstood, let me make it clear that my purpose here is not to let men's boorish, and possibly illegal behavior, off the hook.

On the contrary. I wish that all men were gentlemen, behaving in a dignified and refined manner, especially around ladies. And I also wish that it didn't take the threat of legal action to get them to behave as gentlemen. Lewd comments on the part of lecherous men is the last thing that women should have to tolerate.

But let's acknowledge the incredibly mixed, contradictory and unfair signals that are being given to men. In life outside the office, men's lechery is encouraged in order to persuade men them to watch television or part with their cash. Near-naked twins sell them beer, women in thongs advertise the Miss America pageant, and Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera simulate masturbation in coming attractions for their shows on HBO and Showtime.

After being fed the idea in every corner of the culture that women primarily desire sexual attention, these men are expected to believe that women are going to be insulted, rather than complimented, by uncouth comments about their bodies.

What complicates the question of harassment is the fact that women are being subtly conditioned to use their sexuality to get ahead in the office. No less a branding genius than Donald Trump advised women on "The Apprentice" to play up their sexuality in commercial settings in order to gain power over men. Many women fall for this degrading advice by coming to the office dressed like streetwalkers. Dress codes today are considered outmoded and draconian, and fashion dictates that many women wear blouses cut very low and skirts cut very high. Yet men are expected not to notice. A woman's breasts can be spilling out of her blouse at a board-meeting, and men are expected to see her intelligence.

On my radio show, one man called in to say that there is a woman who works right across from his cubicle who wears see-through blouses nearly every day. "She's essentially wearing only a bra in the office, and I often have to put my hand in front of my face to block her out to stop myself from staring."

I am not blaming the victims or insinuating that women are inviting harassment. Far from it. No matter what they are exposed to and no matter how women dress, men must be in control of themselves and treat women as dignified and intellectual equals. I have never, and will never, excuse boorish behavior. But that does not change the fact that sexual harassment in the workplace is being vastly increased by a culture that both fosters the idea that women are primarily sexual objects, and that puts no emphasis on men and women dressing modestly and professionally.

And you can be sure that until such time that the sexual exploitation of women is reversed – and women reclaim their dignity by refusing to be portrayed on television and the Internet as the lecherous man's playthings – the number of women who have to suffer through male crudity is only going to increase.


TOPICS: Crime/Corruption; Culture/Society; Editorial; News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: billoreilly; boteach; rabbishmuley; rabbishmuleyboteach; sexualharassment; shmuleyboteach
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To: Dat Mon
Now, reading transcripts of the lawyers statements...it is obvious this is a major hit effort on Fox, with Soros and /or the DNC probably footing the bill.

People, YOU ALL MISSED IT!!! THIS IS THEIR NEW ANITA HILL! Straight out of their twelve year old playbook! They ruined Clarence Thomas, now they're out for O'Reilly! ANYTHING to discredit an influential Republican! It's all a scam!

141 posted on 10/18/2004 9:02:16 PM PDT by oprahstheantichrist
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To: drhogan

and as far as the complaints about sexual remarks at the water cooler leading to sexual harassment charges, my advice is this: guys, don't make sexual remarks in mixed company. is it really necessary to make them?
let the women make the sexual remarks, and just laugh, but don't take it further.
this will avoid most law suits.
most women aren't looking to charge anyone with sexual harassment, but there are some nuts out there who will do so. if you make sexual remarks, you are setting yourself up.


142 posted on 10/18/2004 9:02:23 PM PDT by drhogan
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To: Siamese Princess

I agree with you. The whole culture of 'sensitivity' hasn't thought this out, and that leads people to all sorts of odd reactions. If people behaved more maturely, it wouldn't happen.

As for poor Moe in accounting, well, all I'm saying is that his boorishness should be sitigmatized and discouraged, but the idea that it somehow literally becomes a 'federal case' is absurd and doesn't give women much credit for taking care of themselves.

And the UPS Guys have all the fun! ;-)


143 posted on 10/18/2004 9:04:34 PM PDT by HitmanLV (I will not be pushed, filed, stamped, indexed, briefed, debriefed or numbered. My life is my own.)
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To: oprahstheantichrist

"It's all a scam!"

Yes it is. It is total and complete WAR, launched by a criminal organization with lots of global money being poured into this election. Always look at the big picture with these clowns.


144 posted on 10/18/2004 9:10:26 PM PDT by Dat Mon (clever tagline under construction)
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To: wagglebee

i think women should be able to walk around naked without having anybody stare at them.


but seriously, its not that women often invited, they dont do much to stop the gawking.


145 posted on 10/18/2004 9:15:54 PM PDT by KOZ. (i'm so bad i should be in detention)
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To: HitmanNY
I agree with you. The whole culture of 'sensitivity' hasn't thought this out, and that leads people to all sorts of odd reactions. If people behaved more maturely, it wouldn't happen.

As for poor Moe in accounting, well, all I'm saying is that his boorishness should be sitigmatized and discouraged, but the idea that it somehow literally becomes a 'federal case' is absurd and doesn't give women much credit for taking care of themselves.

Some women are afraid to, especially if the one making the remark is a superior.

And the UPS Guys have all the fun! ;-)

Women love a man in uniform. Besides, he delivers good stuff such as new clothing and books, but not bills!

146 posted on 10/18/2004 9:18:18 PM PDT by Siamese Princess
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To: wagglebee
"After being fed the idea in every corner of the culture that women primarily desire sexual attention, these men are expected to believe that women are going to be insulted, rather than complimented, by uncouth comments about their bodies."

After being fed the fantasy, these men are expected to retain a grasp of reality. When they don't, well, there's a word for that.

147 posted on 10/18/2004 9:19:15 PM PDT by Graymatter (Defeat Kerry; shape his soul and let the glory out.)
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To: wagglebee
She goes so far as to state that O'Reilly unlawfully engaged in, and gratified himself with, phone sex, with Mackris on the other end of the line.

The lawyer will take this one assertation and destroy her lawsuit with it. How hard is it to hang up a phone ?

Or will she claim phone sex rape ?

148 posted on 10/18/2004 9:21:16 PM PDT by Centurion2000 (Truth, Justice and the Texan Way)
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To: shaggy eel
",,, in my efforts to date the office water cooler I'm doing my bit to redefine romanticism. We write our own stories."

With that and your alias ("screen name"), I would be afraid of your water cooler.

...only joking, Shag. That was very well written and in-depth.
149 posted on 10/18/2004 9:28:46 PM PDT by familyop (Essayons)
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To: Siamese Princess
"You are correct, but remember that up until recently, men were taught not to curse or discuss certain subjects in mixed company."

That was very well written--that and the whole paragraph. It is contrary to current revisions of social history (the feminist implications that in the past, men were more often vulgar than not and got away with it), and it is very true.
150 posted on 10/18/2004 9:35:17 PM PDT by familyop (Essayons)
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To: RavenATB
>>now that I've seen this girl, I don't believe it for a minute.

By O'Reilly standards she is a goddess.

151 posted on 10/18/2004 9:38:21 PM PDT by Graymatter (Defeat Kerry; shape his soul and let the glory out.)
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To: Centurion2000

"How hard is it to hang up a phone ?"

I say a woman should hang up the phone.

My brother says if a woman is getting a salary (just a guess) of $125,000 a year, and her boss is the one harassing, it is harder to hang up the phone. Most people might just believe the boss and think she's making it all up.

Hopefully, no matter what the salary, most women would hang up the phone.


152 posted on 10/18/2004 9:38:39 PM PDT by Cedar
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To: wagglebee
Generally speaking, men who are outright pervs and proud of it will not have happy marriages and will have kids who are screwed up. I've seen it time and again.

Beyond that, our republic can not be sustained by a nation made up of such men and their screwed up kids. A nation of such individuals will either be conquered from outside or taken over by authoritarians.
153 posted on 10/18/2004 9:41:51 PM PDT by Antoninus (Abortion; Euthanasia; Fetal Stem Cell Research; Human Cloning; Homo Marriage - NON-NEGOTIABLE ISSUES)
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To: irv
OK. Everyone knows how to deal with this! She said no. The rest is her emotional outlook. Yes, I have empathy for her, but the work place is a bitch not a therapy ward.

Crudeness is what should not be accepted. One way or another humans try for sex, male v female and reverse (I am excluding Democratic supporters of certain persuasions.) The crudeness comes in with promotions, IMHO. People of the same ilk promote others of that ilk, If the basis for promotion is sex, crudeness etc, then that is perpetuated in the corporate culture.

I would also suspect that the corporation may have rewarded other "alchies", flirtatious females etc. I am sure that the corporate culture in the entity was not acceptable to a number of people who were not promoted, but who merited a promotion They did not qualify in that corporate atmosphere / culture. I think she did the right thing in leaving, only she took too long. (BTW An office is not the place for a romance.)

154 posted on 10/18/2004 9:48:59 PM PDT by Henchman (Kerry: No guts, No Glory, No way!)
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To: familyop
That was very well written--that and the whole paragraph. It is contrary to current revisions of social history (the feminist implications that in the past, men were more often vulgar than not and got away with it), and it is very true.

Thank you -- I also enjoy a good compliment.

I recall reading an interesting anecdote about John Wayne. In one of his last films, the script called for his character to curse. He indignately and profanely refused. John Wayne, in real life, was a profane man but he also was of the old school: it was one thing for a man to curse behind closed doors, in the presence of other men, but not in public.

155 posted on 10/18/2004 9:52:59 PM PDT by Siamese Princess
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To: HitmanNY
If a man began acting significantly less than a gentleman, a woman would quickly put him in place with a slap, and otherwise tell him that if he kept it up her brothers, boyfrined, or husband would come by and kick the crap out of him.

That's always the problem with the hypothetical scenerio. The brother/father/boyfriend/husband is always able to kick the offenders ass in these scenerios. In real life, I saw two brothers, big guys even, learn a lesson in pain, blood and humility when the biker they were going to teach a lesson for comments to their sister literally tore them up swinging a heavy belt buckle.

Then to add insult to injury, the brothers were arrested in the ER for coming after the guy in the first place. The whole incident was a recurring party joke for at least a year.

Best that the gentle people remember that they're gentle people and not try to be badasses.

156 posted on 10/18/2004 9:56:20 PM PDT by Melas
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To: Melas

I didn't say that the guys would come over and kick the crap out of the guy, just that the woman would say that they would.

I wasn't suggesting at all that it would come to that, but that it is part of the convention of the woman putting a brutish sort in his place.


157 posted on 10/18/2004 10:00:29 PM PDT by HitmanLV (I will not be pushed, filed, stamped, indexed, briefed, debriefed or numbered. My life is my own.)
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To: narses

Marry an import; there is a hell of a lot more of them than Yankee BS, and they love children. Buh bye!


158 posted on 10/18/2004 10:38:00 PM PDT by Tuco Ramirez (Ideas have consequences.)
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To: familyop

Yep, no doubt about it. Males should start behaving like gentlemen. Women should start putting boorish men in their place, too.


159 posted on 10/18/2004 10:58:49 PM PDT by HitmanLV (I will not be pushed, filed, stamped, indexed, briefed, debriefed or numbered. My life is my own.)
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To: knarf; perfect stranger

No lipstick, tiny ear rings, turtleneck, jacket, hair pulled back...is she trying to look like a butch?

I'll bet she's pissed about her last pay raise.


160 posted on 10/19/2004 12:08:06 AM PDT by B4Ranch (´´Firearms are second only to the Constitution in importance; They are our teeth for Liberty)
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