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Composite Americans (Mark Steyn)
National Review ^ | 5-4-2012 | Mark Steyn - Commentary

Posted on 05/05/2012 9:03:28 AM PDT by smoothsailing

Edited on 05/05/2012 10:53:43 AM PDT by Admin Moderator. [history]

But being yourself is never going to be enough in the new composite America. Last week, in an election campaign ad, Barack revealed his latest composite girlfriend — “Julia.” She’s worse than the old New York girlfriend. She can’t even be herself. In fact, she can’t be anything without massive assistance from Barack every step of the way, from his “Head Start” program at the age of three through to his Social Security benefits at the age of 67. Everything good in her life she owes to him. When she writes her memoir, it will be thanks to a subvention from the Federal Publishing Assistance Program for Chronically Dependent Women but you’ll love it: Sweet Dreams from My Sugar Daddy. She’s what the lawyers would call “non composite mentis.” She’s not competent to do a single thing for herself — and, from Barack’s point of view, that’s exactly what he’s looking for in a woman, if only for a one-night stand on a Tuesday in early November.


(Excerpt) Read more at nationalreview.com ...


TOPICS: Editorial; News/Current Events; Philosophy; Politics/Elections
KEYWORDS: elizabethwarren; julia; marksteyn; obamagirlfriend

1 posted on 05/05/2012 9:03:31 AM PDT by smoothsailing
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To: smoothsailing

I laughed til I cried.


2 posted on 05/05/2012 9:13:54 AM PDT by mojito
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To: smoothsailing

Very amusing, Steyn does it again


3 posted on 05/05/2012 9:15:18 AM PDT by RichardMoore (There is only one issue- Life: dump TV and follow a plant based diet)
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To: smoothsailing
A LOT of excellent gems in there!

Like Warren's memoirs in "Dreams from My Great-Great-Great-Grandmother."

4 posted on 05/05/2012 9:16:29 AM PDT by C210N (Wanted: Tagline)
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To: smoothsailing
Pete Stark ... My 10 year old is after me ...
He's 80+ years old, which means he was 70 when he had a kid?
Too bad he'll be croaking soon and his kid will be too young to inherit the "Stark Seat."
5 posted on 05/05/2012 9:18:16 AM PDT by oh8eleven (RVN '67-'68)
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To: smoothsailing

Can’t say I’ve dated any composite women but I have built composite rocket motors!


6 posted on 05/05/2012 9:20:55 AM PDT by Jack Hydrazine (It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine!)
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To: smoothsailing
"Under the Third Reich’s Nuremberg Laws, Ms. Warren would have been classified as Aryan and Mr. Zimmerman as non-Aryan. Now it’s the other way round. Progress!"

ROFL!!!!

7 posted on 05/05/2012 9:22:23 AM PDT by KoRn (Department of Homeland Security, Certified - "Right Wing Extremist")
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To: smoothsailing

Unfortunately, none of my liberal acquaintances have enough intellectual curiosity or capacity to ever read this article. To be a liberal is to be either intellectually lazy or intellectually dishonest....


8 posted on 05/05/2012 9:23:43 AM PDT by freebilly
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To: smoothsailing
Martin Luther King dreamed of a day when men would be judged not on the color of their skin but on the content of their great-great-great-grandmother’s wedding-license application. And now it’s here!

Brilliant and hilarious! Steyn is a gem!!!

9 posted on 05/05/2012 9:32:03 AM PDT by Mygirlsmom (Julia!!!!!! Don't Let Him Fool 'ya!!!!)
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To: KoRn

I dated a composite gal in Shreveport over four years. She was a bit tall, 200 pounds, wore leopard skin tights mostly, sipped Pabst Blue Ribbon from the can, had attended Louisiana Tech and some Baptist University in Arkansas, had a uncontrollable wink in her left eye, had a tick on her ear once, bought wart remover by the case, claimed she’d been taken by aliens once, helped her cousin dig a septic tank, and could figure the timing on Ford pick-up strictly by the sound of the engine.

The thing is...most guys would all prefer to remember their composite women in their life...more than the actual women. It’s a sad, sorrowful tale of how things end up.


10 posted on 05/05/2012 9:33:08 AM PDT by pepsionice
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To: smoothsailing

This should be a required reading at every University in America!
haha


11 posted on 05/05/2012 9:38:08 AM PDT by Leep (Enemy of the Statist)
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To: Jack Hydrazine

I dated some composite chicks back in the day at the University of Michigan. And they are all still crazy after all these years.


12 posted on 05/05/2012 9:43:41 AM PDT by Thebaddog (Remember, Obama said he's only 60% done with his agenda.)
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To: Thebaddog
Ditto at University of Iowa.
They're still dining at Hamberg Inn, wondering, “When are we ever getting out of Iowa City ?”
13 posted on 05/05/2012 9:57:38 AM PDT by Eric in the Ozarks
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To: smoothsailing

If Obama traded in this composite girl for the Wide Load, she must have been the ugliest woman in the world, and frigid to boot.


14 posted on 05/05/2012 10:00:20 AM PDT by Venturer
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To: freebilly
To be a liberal is to be either intellectually lazy or intellectually dishonest....

I choose "both" for $500, Alex!

Steyn is a treasure.

15 posted on 05/05/2012 10:01:04 AM PDT by Gritty (People don't expect chastity in a whorehouse. Why then expect honesty in government?-HL Mencken)
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To: Thebaddog
I dated some composite chicks back in the day at the University of Michigan. And they are all still crazy after all these years.

Of course they are composite. It's UM.

Go Spartans!

16 posted on 05/05/2012 10:03:28 AM PDT by Darren McCarty (The Republican Party is bigger than the presidency.)
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To: nutmeg

bookmark


17 posted on 05/05/2012 10:05:28 AM PDT by nutmeg (Rest in peace, and thank you, Andrew Breitbart)
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To: pepsionice
and could figure the timing on Ford pick-up strictly by the sound of the engine.

Knew a gal like that in high school. Her two brothers were both mechanics. I dated her for a while and she tuned up my 55 Crown Vic. I was so impressed, I asked her to the Prom! We had a great time! :)

18 posted on 05/05/2012 10:18:40 AM PDT by smoothsailing
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To: JLS

Mark Steyn ping.


19 posted on 05/05/2012 10:25:31 AM PDT by smoothsailing
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To: smoothsailing
LOL!

Funny piece by Steyn on Obama’s fake girlfriend and Warren the fake Indian.

Not funny though is the fake president sitting in the very real Oval Office.

20 posted on 05/05/2012 11:06:16 AM PDT by jazusamo ("Intellect is not wisdom" -- Thomas Sowell)
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To: freebilly
To be a liberal is to be either intellectually lazy or intellectually dishonest....

Only the smart ones are dishonest.

The rest are lazy.

21 posted on 05/05/2012 11:19:11 AM PDT by okie01
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To: mojito
I laughed til I cried.

Me too! The RNC or Romney needs to hire him. All the absurdities of the left need to be mocked withhout mercy.

22 posted on 05/05/2012 11:32:43 AM PDT by neverdem (Xin loi minh oi)
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To: Mygirlsmom

Steyn is great


23 posted on 05/05/2012 11:36:15 AM PDT by GeronL (The Right to Life came before the Right to Pursue Happiness)
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To: jazusamo

Julia can do almost anything, thanks to the forward-thinking and omniscient genius possessed by her creator, and the statutorily-imposed generosity of her human counterparts.
However, Julia has yet to develop the capacity to achieve success absent a considerable injection of federal funding or “stimulus,” often in the form of grants or loans. She was recently voted “Most Outgoing Volunteer Gardener” by the members of her commune.

24 posted on 05/05/2012 12:08:20 PM PDT by smoothsailing
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To: Admin Moderator

Thread History Composite Americans (Mark Steyn)
Edited (LAT/WP) on 05/05/2012 10:53:42 AM PDT by Admin Moderator
Reason:

Steyn must be excerpted

.................................................

Steyn must be excerpted? Then Steyn can KMA! I’ll never post anything of his again, damn Canadian pansy! LOL!


25 posted on 05/05/2012 12:14:32 PM PDT by smoothsailing
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To: smoothsailing
Pretty clever...They managed to include Crazy Joe. :-)

Julia thinks about many things, such as: fairness, NCAA basketball, and the disturbing behavior of a human-like counterpart known as a “Joe Biden.”

26 posted on 05/05/2012 12:32:05 PM PDT by jazusamo ("Intellect is not wisdom" -- Thomas Sowell)
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To: smoothsailing
Martin Luther King dreamed of a day when men would be judged not on the color of their skin but on the content of their great-great-great-grandmother’s wedding-license application. And now it’s here!


27 posted on 05/05/2012 4:39:15 PM PDT by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: TheOldLady; Rummyfan; Howlin; riley1992; Miss Marple; Dane; sinkspur; steve; kattracks; ...

Mark Steyn ping.

Freepmail me, if you want on or off the Mark Steyn ping list.

Thanks for the ping smoothsailing.


28 posted on 05/05/2012 4:55:25 PM PDT by JLS (How to turn a recession into a depression: elect a Dem president with a big majorities in Congress))
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To: smoothsailing

If Steyn could teach the Romney campaign to parody Obama half as well as he does, this would be the funniest political campaign ever.

More importantly, Obama can’t handle being made fun of. He would lose control, followed quickly by losing the election.


29 posted on 05/06/2012 8:31:07 AM PDT by irv (Live Tea or die!)
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To: Darren McCarty

That’s harsh. Although, it’s true.


30 posted on 05/06/2012 8:48:50 AM PDT by Thebaddog (Remember, Obama said he's only 60% done with his agenda.)
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To: freebilly

LIEberals are both intellectually lazy and intellectually dishonest!

That is why I refer to them as LIEberals!


31 posted on 05/06/2012 9:17:24 PM PDT by Taxman (So that the beautiful pressure does not diminish!)
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To: smoothsailing

Complete hilarity, Mark is a true treasure. This is one of the funniest columns of his I have read in a while. Good lord, I cannot believe anyone takes these people seriously.


32 posted on 05/06/2012 9:40:16 PM PDT by jazzo (Resistance is Futile)
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To: smoothsailing

Way too funny!


33 posted on 05/06/2012 9:53:02 PM PDT by Chgogal (WSJ, Coulter, Kristol, Krauthammer, Rove et al., STFU. Thank you.)
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To: Chgogal

It’s really not funny when you think that if it were any one of us, purporting to be a minority to get into school, we’d be in the clink right now...


34 posted on 05/07/2012 2:57:51 AM PDT by nikos1121
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To: smoothsailing

Absolute classic. Fauxcahontas really got me. Brilliant.


35 posted on 05/07/2012 1:45:46 PM PDT by Wyatt's Torch (I can explain it to you. I can't understand it for you.)
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