Skip to comments.Missing Danielle Parents Allegedly Swingers
Posted on 02/11/2002 5:06:42 PM PST by Petronski
Larry asked them about it just now on Larry King Live (2-11-2), and they refused to deny it.
I agree with you, but I have thought from the minute I saw these parents on TV (before all this swinger stuff was known) they seem ODD to me. Their affect isnt' what I'd expect from distraught parents who have had their precious 7 yr old taken. I'm amazed they can speak in front of cameras without breaking down - there is an emotional *detachment* I think even when they make their public pleas....
As zonked as Chandra Levy's mom always appeared, you knew this woman was completely broken/distraught at her daughter's disappearance.
I think there is more to this story, and probably one of mom's *friends* got access to the girl, and took her.
God please protect that poor innocent child.
Why is everybody so sure the people the mother brought home were strangers? This was a local bar/cafe in the neighborhood she went to,and it's likely she knew most of the people there.
Wrong. The sickos are the people who raise their children to fear their sexual urges,and to think that they will burn in a pit of fire forever for merely having desires. It's the sexaully repressed/obsessed who are twisted,and they twist their children as a part of their natural being.
I've known several couples who were swingers,and their children all grew up to be responsible and successful adults.
Here is where your thinking goes wrong,Don. You are seeing sex as something a woman needs "protection" from. Maybe even as something that hurts her.
There are many swappers, but they are degenerates who do not love like other men.
They are not "degererates" just because they think differently than you about sex.
Of course she is hard and cold-looking. You are seeing your own image reflected back at you. On the other hand,a woman who is involved in mate-swapping is anything BUT "hard and cold".
I would think that it would take a touch of emotional detachment to be a swinger. Most of the women I have known in my life - friends, relatives, lovers - have closely tied sex to an emotional commitment. It is not hard to see that one who does feel that way, i.e. sex=emotional intimacy, would see someone who doesn't feel that way as "cold" emotionally. Since most women do associate sex with emotional intimacy, I would say that a women who is perceived as to not feel that way would be described as "cold."
Wonder if she has a drinking problem?
Meow! And what does this have to do with her daughter being kidnapped? You DO remember there is a missing child,right?
There is an expectation of parental responsibility on the part of society. If one has has a drinking problem that leads to spending hours away from her children and bringing intoxicated "drinking buddies" home at 2:00am, then this is very relavent to the daughter's disappearance. I also think that questioning whether or not someone who stays out until 2:00am at a bar has a drinking problem is a reasonable question.
This is all speculation, but if nothing else, it does seem to me to be a cautionary note for those who think that their "private lifestyles" don't effect their children. Most who are involved in these "lifestyles" are so blinded by them that they can't see the emotional devestation around them.
I think it's pretty interesting that you automatically equate a woman having sex to "whoring herself out". You think sex is dirty,don't you?
That's just as moronic a statement as saying that swingers can't be loving parents. I happen to know many couples who you would consider twisted and all their children grew up to have healthy sex lives and not get divorced, either. What you think of as teaching children to "fear" their sexual urges is really teaching them to "control" them. You don't have to scratch every itch, believe it or not, just like you don't have to feed your face every time you think of food. There's a happy balance between The Scarlet Letter and Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice.
Back to the main subject, though, it remains to be seen whether or not Danielle's parents' lifestyle is incidental to her disappearance or not. It may have a lot to do with it, or it may have nothing to do with it. If it was someone outside the home who took her, and that someone knew that the parents' attentions were, shall we say, diverted at the time of the abduction, then their lifestyle choice is fair game, in my opinion. It's not something you can keep secret, and if the parents haven't been honest about their actions on the night in question, when the stakes are so high (their little girl's life), it's my natural urge to suspect the parents of, at the very least, worrying more about their lifestyle being exposed instead of their daughter's life, and I know you think it's healthy to indulge our urges.
Of course, they could have been completely honest with the police and the police could have been trying to "clean up" the parents' alibi for public consumption and not done a very good job of it.
The mother and dad were on the news last night.
God, the mom looked skanky and the dad looked like a cuckold!
Lotta' miles on the old ladies paws. But in a dark,
smokey bar... I could drink her pretty.
You don't know that. I would argue exactly the opposite. Because they were "swingers" (whoring around might be a better word for it), they are exposing themselves and their children to huge risks. They get drunk/stoned and pick up barflies, then bring them home with them. Aside from sexually transmitted diseases, they should worry about perverts, serial killers, home robbery (excellent casing opportunity, after all) and any number of vile things. Despite claims to the contrary, child molesters often use a parent, usually the mother, as the quickest route to the child.
I think the real problem in marriages like this is that neither partner had a real commitment to the marriage. Unfortunately, in this day and age when even the meaning of "is" comes under fire, no one takes solemn vows very seriously. When you vow to God and your mate, in front of family, friends, and the congregation, to remain true, then break those vows, how can that lead to anything worthwhile?
A case of the pot calling the kettle black? See post #208, where someone named EricOKC wrote:
I mean, I cant imagine anyone would be able to remain faithful being married to a closed minded, judgemental, sanctimonious prig like yourself...
You might have it both ways in your marriage, but in a debate, there are people present who actually think and reason. Your arguments don't hold up well here. We see them for what they are, even if you don't.
Birds of a feather . . . in this case, not the best birds.
#2, and this one REALLY got me, why didn't the mom check on the kids when she got home? This to me makes NO sense. You always check on your kids, ALWAYS, it's an instinct. My kid is 16, if I fall asleep on the coach and wake up at 2 am, even if I know she was home when I fell asleep, I still check on her as I make my way to the bed.
As we say in New York, these parents are not Kosher. As we say in general, their story sounds pretty fishy. The idea that the mom and the neighbor were dancing at the bar is just too much.
I hope the local police recall the case of the poor girl from Long Island who was kept prisoner in a home-made dungeon. As hubby exclaimed to me while I was reading 'emerging details' in Newsday (the Long Island daily paper)'Does it disturb you? That she was surrounded by child molesters? DOES IT DISTURB YOU?!?!' Of course, it did disturb me very much. The little girl from Long Island was rescued, finally. Luckily her captor wasn't killed in a car crash, nor dropped dead of a heart attack (he was no kid the guy, in his 50's) before the cops cracked his story. I hope poor Danielle will be so lucky.
If the parents know stuff they're not telling,they better spill their guts NOW! Or they are going to really rot in Hell.
I don't participate in "swinging", I've known people who did, and you are right in saying that most people here probably would never be able to ID a swinger on sight. In fact, I dare say that any one here who has a fairly large circle of friends, acquaintances, and work relations, knows a swinger or two.
I don't know if their actions that night precipitated the kidnapping, I wouldn't go as far as pinpointing guilt on them based on their sexual promiscuity, or "lifestyle", I don't think Molly Klaas had "swinger" parents.
Truth of the matter is that this kind of thing happens, to "swingers" as well as to normal, everyday families. It seems to me that way too many people in here are willing to lay blame on the parents, and seem to be forgetting that whomever took that little girl is the guilty party, her parents sexual preferences do not excuse the kidnapping.
I have read comments here from people calling your lifestyle "sick", and "perverted", praying for you.
The biggest bunch of sexual deviants and adulterers I ever came across where members of a Church in a small town in Alabama where I lived once for a few months on a job-related assignment. Everyone was sleeping with someone else's wife, including the Pastor, who was sleeping with an 18 year-old member of his choir. I know all this because his wife is my oldest friend, and I helped her get a lawyer when she divorced him. I guess I can now claim the moral high ground and brand all Southern Baptists as sick, adulterers, and vile sinners. Turn about is fair play they say. But it would be wrong to do that wouldn't it?
It wouldn't surprise me if some of those very same type of people are in here passing judgement on you. I wonder how many of them would be as willing to have their bedroom actions judged by us all.
Hang in there;
grlfrnd, that's the thing that bothers me the most. Anyone who would do the things these "parents" do, would not necessarily be above bringing their children into that "lifestyle." After all, if they believe in it with all their heart as EricOKC seems to, why wouldn't they think it in the "best interest of the child" to bring them into it, too? If I were the police, I'd sure be looking into that family, questioning everyone (that they know of) they've "brought home" for their little sex parties--could it be the daughter was part of the party, and someone got too rough?
If you had a problem be content that you overcame it and you did not lose a child over it.
Sorry to post two replies, but what on earth do you mean, no signs of foul play? There's a ten year old, she goes to bed, in the morning she's gone, she doesn't turn up in an hour or two...is this not a sign of foul play? If you mean no sign of murder, that's one thing, but there has certainly been "play" and it has certainly been foul. I do not think foul play means just murder,or even violence, it means illegal activity.
What I hear that sometimes makes me uneasy is when a character like Mrs. Dam is castigated for a "cold demeanor"--seems to me that a mom who's holding onto sanity by her fingernails might just exhibit innapropriate demeanor. Some people react to horror with the giggles.
Better evidence does suggest that she's a bad 'un, though, than mere facial affect.
Reading this thread this morning, I had the same question. "Methinks ErickOKC protesteth too much." Maybe there's more jealousy here than is at first apparent.
Did I say that a woman having sex with her boyfriend or husband is bad? I guess you're right. Girls who do the whole football team are just fine upstanding types. BTW, I don't think sex is necessarily dirty...it depends on what kind of condiments are involved. lol
Heh heh heh...
I too felt the mother, in particular, lacked emotion and it took days before we finally saw tears. Frankly, their rehearsals before facing the media are NOT a conspicuous success!
Are you calling sexual promiscuity a crime?
And, as has been stated here before, this is exactly the rationalization child molesters use. To NAMBLA, for instance, it's perfectly normal for grown men to rape young boys. It's a "lifestyle choice." To the rest of us, it's a sickness.
Yes, I have. The only person I knew in college that possessed that kind of mentality didn't even make it through the first year before dropping out. He was barely old enough to buy beer legally.
I also spent several years in the military, which is where the term "party hard" probably originated from. I'm not unfamiliar with people wanting to party.
This just doesn't add up. This man isn't some wet behind the ears 21 year old that just became old enough to buy beer last week. He's a middle aged man who looks like he's old enough to have kids either in high school or college. It sounds like a duck, looks like a duck, smells like a duck, and acts like a duck. My guess is, it's a duck.
I know there are exceptions to every rule. But most people settle down and begin to act more responsible as they get older. For this middle age man to behave this way, it's unusual compared to the norm, hence, it's strange.
These people are normally heterosexuals who want to be promiscuous. There is really nothing "perverted" about their sexual preferences.
Immoral? Perhaps that would be a better word, as the problem with the actions of a swinging couple clash with Christian norms.
What part of "I'm not saying that just because the mother passed a polygraph that she isn't involved" was not clear to you?
He doesn't care. He would simply claim that his kids problems were 'incidental' to him being a swinger.
I have no doubt at all this is what they told you. I just don't believe it is the total truth. Women seem to like to have one "emotional" tie,but this doesn't keep them from having purely physical ones,either.
As I said before, the parents' lifestyle may or may not be material to the little girl's disappearance. But if they lied to the police about their actions on the night in question, in order to avoid exposing their lifestyle, you can hardly blame anyone for commenting on their lifestyle and wondering what else they're hiding. Was their lifestyle a "family affair", and can you blame anybody for wondering about it? Everybody seems to be thinking that they're, at the very least, irresponsible for allowing whatever it was they were doing to prevent them from checking on the children, especially after the alarm had gone off and a door was open. If one or both of the parents were stinking drunk and passed out on the couch, we would all be faulting them for allowing alcohol to interfere with their parental responsibilities.
I have my doubts as to whether or not their checking on the children would have prevented any abduction, though. I mean, if they had checked on the children as soon as they discovered the open door and the alarm, the most it would have done is to alert them to her disappearance a few hours sooner, which would certainly have made a great deal of difference in finding out what happened to her, but it probably wouldn't have prevented the abduction.
Well, he needs to report to the Psych Ward, but this kind of sickness is not a crime.