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Boys File Suit For Admission to Girl Scouts
CNSNews.com ^ | September 24, 2002 | Dover Smeed

Posted on 09/24/2002 11:17:54 AM PDT by Moosejaw

A group of high school students from Gary, Indiana is suing the Girl Scouts for not admitting teenage boys to a local troop.

The lawsuit, filed in U.S. District Court in Indianapolis Tuesday, asks the court to allow five boys, ages 15 and 16, to join a local Girl Scout troop and to find the organization's membership policies discriminatory, calling the girls-only policy "one that arbitrarily, capriciously and unconstitutionally excludes persons based solely on a personal characteristic - their sex."

About 2.8 million girls between the ages of five and 17 belong to the Girl Scouts and its associated organizations, according to Girl Scouts of the USA.

"The hate and discrimination displayed by the Girl Scouts' deliberate exclusion of teenage boys is a travesty that needs to stop now," said Clarence Knustler, attorney for the boys. "The claim that discriminating is essential to their ability to convey what they want to convey to their members is appalling."

One of the boys named as a plaintiff in the suit, 16-year-old Kyle Nadler, said the lawsuit boiled down to a question of freedom of association.

"I just figured joining the Girl Scouts would be a good way to, you know, meet some chicks and all," said Nadler, a junior at Lew Wallace High School in Gary. "I'm thinking if I can join now, I'd probably meet some babes in time for prom."

Similar sentiments were expressed by 15-year-old Derrick Baldwin, another plaintiff who also attends Lew Wallace High. "It's hard to meet cool chicks who are, like, in to fire and stuff, so joining the Girl Scouts would be the bomb," said Baldwin. "I mean, what's the big deal about scouting for a babe who digs me? Get it?"

"Besides," said Baldwin, "Samoas rule."

Girl Scouts of the USA spokesperson Helen Rao said the group wants to keep teenage boys out of the organization because "the introduction of an adolescent, male-female dynamic into Girl Scouting would be counter-productive to our mission and place our girls in a potentially difficult situation."

According to Rao, scout leaders and some parents have voiced fears that allowing teenage boys to join the Girl Scouts might result in "unwanted advances and inappropriate liaisons," between scouts, undermining the mission of the group.

But Knustler discounted the notion that allowing teenage boys to join the Girl Scouts might lead to sexual activity among scouts. "This is just such an outrageous smear," said Knustler. "It's this sort of extremist stereotyping that causes so many problems for so many teenage boys."

Instead, Knustler argued that the Girl Scouts should open its membership to teenage boys "as a demonstration of their commitment to diversity and a repudiation of bigoted conservatism," and that the inclusion of boys would only help the Girl Scouts with their various philanthropic activities.

Knustler also noted that adult male volunteers are allowed to participate in Girl Scout activities, and said denying membership to teenage boys "smacks of age discrimination."

Juliet Low, the leader of Girl Scout Troop 327 in Gary, Ind., expressed concerns that adding teenage boys to her troop might compel parents to pull their daughters out of the program.

"Parents look to us for safe guidance and supervision of their daughters," said Low. "To include teenage boys in our camping and nature activities would trigger a negative response from moms and dads who don't want their girls possibly facing the advances of boys."

According to Low, the "natural inclinations and orientation," of teenage boys would "unnecessarily place our girls at risk of getting into an unwanted situation. We have an obligation to keep these girls out of situations where they might get into trouble."

But Nadler said Low's argument was moot because teenage boys and girls would invariably "hook up" regardless of whether he and other boys gained admission to the Girl Scouts.

"If a chick's got the hots for me, I'm down with that," said Nadler. "It's not, like, a question of 'if,' it's a question of 'when.' This just kind of makes the whole hooking-up thing so much cooler."

Nadler and his fellow plaintiffs found support from the Planned Parenthood Federation of America, which is reviewing the boys' lawsuit and may bolster their case through 'friend of the court' briefings.

"The co-mingling of young boys and girls in remote, loosely-supervised situations is a healthy and natural part of becoming a productive adult member of society," said Planned Parenthood Deputy Communications Director Delores Iudicap. "We strongly encourage teenagers to seek and find opportunities to interrelate with each other, without adult intrusion, as part of their personal growth."

Send a Letter to the Editor about this satire.


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Editorial; News/Current Events; Political Humor/Cartoons; US: Indiana
KEYWORDS: boyscouts; girlsscouts; satire
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1 posted on 09/24/2002 11:17:54 AM PDT by Moosejaw
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To: Moosejaw
hahahahaha....bet the feminist man haters never thought they'd see this day...reap the whirlwind.
2 posted on 09/24/2002 11:19:01 AM PDT by galt-jw
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To: Moosejaw
"I just figured joining the Girl Scouts would be a good way to, you know, meet some chicks and all," said Nadler, a junior at Lew Wallace High School in Gary. "I'm thinking if I can join now, I'd probably meet some babes in time for prom."

LOL. I hope they lose, however, this is a good example of the many ridiculous lawsuits that women and gays have filed.

3 posted on 09/24/2002 11:19:19 AM PDT by ItisaReligionofPeace
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To: Moosejaw
Almost had me for a minute.... First clue: the names "Knustler" (like Kunstler) and Nadler.
4 posted on 09/24/2002 11:20:16 AM PDT by r9etb
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To: Moosejaw
Juliet Low

If you are named after the founding of Girl Scouting, i guess you WOULD have to grow up to be a GS leader...; )

5 posted on 09/24/2002 11:20:37 AM PDT by xsmommy
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To: Moosejaw
Nice to know that these boys think the girl scouts is a dating service for them. This is the stupidist thing I have ever heard. But want do you want - The have the backing of Planned Parenthood and probably every liberal moron in the country.
6 posted on 09/24/2002 11:21:07 AM PDT by areafiftyone
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To: Moosejaw
"Parents look to us for safe guidance and supervision of their daughters," said Low. "To include teenage boys in our camping and nature activities would trigger a negative response from moms and dads who don't want their girls possibly facing the advances of boys."

How about this version:

"Parents look to us for safe guidance and supervision of their sons," said Low. "To include gay men in our camping and nature activities would trigger a negative response from moms and dads who don't want their sons possibly facing the advances of gay men."

7 posted on 09/24/2002 11:21:37 AM PDT by ItisaReligionofPeace
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To: ItisaReligionofPeace
I knew better than to believe this was real!
8 posted on 09/24/2002 11:22:19 AM PDT by ItisaReligionofPeace
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To: Moosejaw
I'm sure the lesbian staff of the Girl Scouts are in an uproar over this.
9 posted on 09/24/2002 11:22:46 AM PDT by ChocChipCookie
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To: Moosejaw
Wonder how the feminists are going to reconcile their position on this suit with their position on Augusta?
10 posted on 09/24/2002 11:22:54 AM PDT by mewzilla
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To: All
Satire, people...it's satire. As in "not true."
11 posted on 09/24/2002 11:24:20 AM PDT by TheBigB
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To: ItisaReligionofPeace
Send a Letter to the Editor about this satire.
12 posted on 09/24/2002 11:24:31 AM PDT by xsmommy
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To: xsmommy
I saw it at the end. I posted before finishing it! A lesson learned! (for the tenth time, lol)
13 posted on 09/24/2002 11:25:39 AM PDT by ItisaReligionofPeace
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To: TheBigB
Satire... It's a pretty sad day when satire requires a disclaimer.
14 posted on 09/24/2002 11:26:33 AM PDT by mewzilla
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To: TheBigB
For sure, but there is one eternal truth in this satire:

"Besides," said Baldwin, "Samoas rule."

Here here!

15 posted on 09/24/2002 11:26:42 AM PDT by Moosejaw
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To: Moosejaw
Samoan bump. =D
16 posted on 09/24/2002 11:27:19 AM PDT by TheBigB
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To: Moosejaw
This isn't an Onion story? You mean it's real? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! That's the funniest thing I've heard in a long time.
17 posted on 09/24/2002 11:27:54 AM PDT by RAT Patrol
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To: Moosejaw
Does Living Well Lady still exist?
18 posted on 09/24/2002 11:30:28 AM PDT by RobRoy
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To: Moosejaw
Well, not unexpected but still reads like the Onion.

Reminds me of a health club in Boston where women wanted single sex facilities. When reminded the law had been changed to specifically prohibit that, because the club in question had once been all male, the women responded some of them did not feel comfortable working out in the presence of men and eventually got a female only annex.

Little mention was made of men that may have felt uncomfortable working out in the presence of women; the original reason to have single sex fitness clubs.
19 posted on 09/24/2002 11:30:36 AM PDT by swarthyguy
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To: mewzilla
If the NOW crowd can sue male groups, than it is only fair that that the same medicine they perscribe be perscribed for them. After all it is a question about equality. Isn't NOW about eqaulity, or is NOW only about equality when NOW wants it?

The NOW answer. When now demands equality, there needs to equality, when males want equality -- there is no need to have eqaulity -- all kinds of excuses come up about sexuality.
20 posted on 09/24/2002 11:30:44 AM PDT by GaryMontana
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