Kidnappers demand $800 for return of Baby Jesus

Ananova ^ | December 15, 2002 | Ananova

[MadIvan]

Thieves have stolen a baby Jesus from a display in New Jersey and are demanding $800 in ransom.

The model statue was taken from outside the home of Tom and Candy Konczos in Trenton, New Jersey.

Police say the kidnappers left a computer-generated type-written ransom note demanding $800 in "small" bills in exchange returning the plastic figurine.

The note was signed by "Me, him and the other kid who was really scared and didn't want to take your baby Jesus and the whole time all he did was say stuff like you're going to hell."

Local police said they think kids playing a prank are behind the kidnapping.

But the ransom note is "kind of unsettling" a spokesman told The Trentonian.

[MadIvan]

I dare say God is not amused.

Regards, Ivan

[MadIvan]

Bump!

[OldFriend]

The baby jesus was kidnapped by the left a long long time ago.

[Happygal]

Hmmm...a case for the Three Wise Men, methinks! ;-)

[Desdemona]

Three wise men? Well, it definitely wasn't these three, although on got it right.

The note was signed by "Me, him and the other kid who was really scared and didn't want to take your baby Jesus and the whole time all he did was say stuff like you're going to hell."

[billorites]

Well, I don't care if it rains or freezes,
Long as I have my plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
Through all trials and tribulations,
We will travel every nation,
With my plastic Jesus I'll go far.

[Happygal]

That plastic Jesus don't slip or slide,
Coz his ass is magnetised,
Sitting on the dashboard of my car! ;-)

[MadIvan]

Three wise men? Well, it definitely wasn't these three, although on got it right.

The Three Wise Guys maybe. ;)

Regards, Ivan

[AnAmericanMother]

If I weave around at night,
And the Police think I'm tight,
They never find my bottle - though they ask.
Plastic Jesus shelters me,
For His head comes off, you see
He's hollow, and I use Him for a flask.

Plastic Jesus! Plastic Jesus,
Riding on the dashboard of my car ...
Ride with me and have a dram
Of the blood of the Lamb -
Plastic Jesus is a holy bar.

Our rector actually preached a SERMON on this song once (our rector can't sing. We have threatened to throw an altar cloth over him on occasion.)

[TXBubba]

Wow! It's been a LONG time since I heard that song.

[Paul Atreides]

What is with young people today, thinking they have to do idiotic and/or destructive things in order to have fun?

[Texas_Jarhead]

I'm telling you, this kinda crap is religious intimidation. It should be treated as a 'hate crime'.

[Calvin Locke]

TV.

Saw this done on "Married w/ Children" the other week. Natch, the statues are beheaded courtesy of a trip through a
tunnel, but people flocked to see the miracle impressions of Mary & Joseph ...

[Young Werther]

Remember the Dragnet episode that would play every year in the 50s and maybe into the 60's?

I kinda like the idea of Baby Jesus going for ride in the little red wagon.

[INSENSITIVE GUY]

ROUNDUP ALL THE USUAL LIBERAL SUSPECTS!

[CnTXBobcat]

"....he'll just have to go....his magnet @#$%'s my radio..."

Just can't beat The FlameTrick Subs

[Imal]

I'm telling you, this kinda crap is religious intimidation. It should be treated as a 'hate crime'.

It is only a "hate crime" if the victim is not a Christian.

[Hank Kerchief]

I dare say God is not amused.

I thought the article said, "ransom note demanding $800 in 'small' bills in exchange returning the plastic figurine." Is God a "plastic figurine?"

What religion is that, anyway?

Hank

[MadIvan]

I thought the article said, "ransom note demanding $800 in 'small' bills in exchange returning the plastic figurine." Is God a "plastic figurine?"

The "Thou shalt not steal" commandment is still in force the last time I checked.

Regards, Ivan

[RichInOC]

The reply I'd like to see:

"Dear Me, him and the other kid...we don't have eight hundred to spare. Keep the figurine. But the real Baby Jesus is returning soon...and boy, will he be p**sed at you.

"Regards and Merry Christmas,
"Tom and Candy"