Posted on 01/10/2003 7:42:20 AM PST by Happy Valley Dude
BLANTYRE, Malawi (Reuters) - Hundreds of angry Malawians hounded a senior political figure from his house and stoned him late Wednesday, accusing him of harboring vampires. Blantire Urban Governor Eric Chiwaya, a member of the ruling United Democratic Front, was the latest victim of a bizarre rumor that the country's government is colluding with vampires to collect human blood for international aid agencies.
Bearing severe cuts to his face and body, he told Reuters from his hospital bed that a crowd had hailed him with stones and other missiles, chanting "vampire" and threatening to kill him.
Chiwaya said he knew some of his assailants, adding that political opponents were trying to discredit him and the government.
The vampire rumors have sparked several vigilante attacks on suspected bloodsuckers in recent weeks, despite official attempts to stop the rumor. One man was stoned to death, and three priests were attacked by angry villagers in the south.
Political tensions are already high in Malawi. President Bakili Muluzi's attempts to stay in office for another five-year term have already sparked protests, while many face starvation in the face of a regional food crisis.
It was not overtly political, but had an insurgent kind of conservatism to it. Read the linked article and let me know what you think :-)
Includes these fine gems ...
"The second stream of witchcraft derives from the Mohammedan influences in East Africa – from the Arabs who landed here centuries ago – and involves the deployment of ‘genies’ (as in Aladdin) to achieve one’s ends. It is grounded in texts from the Qur’an and here, you ‘rent’ the services of a genie to fulfil your wishes for you. You can even buy a genie to work for you permanently and exclusively if you have a few hundred thousand shillings at hand."
...and the magical attraction of “Nairobi girls”. (Not posting further information here)
13 Congolese sorcerers steal and shrink penises
Not to mention vampire politicians.
Must be a lot of those
It was hard for me to focus on the theme of the article, which was that the episodes had conservative (or at least nonliberal) themes, because the episodes themselves were so lush and rich. I had trouble boiling it down to the political angle.
Also, there was no mention of the Cigarette-Smoking Man, my favorite character!
There was one episode, “Musings of a Cigarette Smoking Man,” that gives his whole backstory. If you liked the character, that episode is a must see if you haven’t already seen it...
That was a great episode.
Teacher and pupils at Chipoka Primary School in Senior Chief Nsokolo’s area in Mbala in Northern Province are living in fear due to rampant witchcraft sexual abuse at night.
Zambia News and Information Services reports that Mbala District Commissioner (DC), Best Kabulembe has since appealed to the community at Chipoka to stop harassing the teachers and pupils through witchcraft.
Kabulembe said Chipoka primary school risks closure because teachers at the learning institution were insecure due to continued reports of abuse of girls and teachers at night through witchcraft.
The DC who was accompanied by the District Education Board Secretary, Alice Kamwi said this on Tuesday when he addressed members of the community at Chipoka following numerous complaints of wizards abusing girls and teachers by sleeping with them at night.
He threatened to close the school if teachers and pupils continues to live in fear because of witchcraft activities.
Kabulembe said this was the second time of such reports of teachers running ways from the school, the first being in 2006 when the school was almost closed after all the teachers deserted the institution over the same witchcraft harassment
The DC has since tasked the Parent’s Teachers Association (PTA) to sort the issues with the community for the benefit of their children who want to learn.
It seems that teachers at the Nashongo and Makaba primary schools in Siavonga, Zambia have threatened to abandon their posts after a rash of indecent incidents involving invisible witches.
According to Chief Sinadambwe of the Tonga-speaking people, the saucy sorcerers have been projecting their spirits into the teachers' bedrooms and molesting them. And they don’t even have the decency to call in the morning. ...Chief Sinadambwe told the Zambia Daily Mail:
‘The male teachers complained that they have been having sex with women they cannot see. This has been happening to them for about three weeks.’
...Chief Sinadambwe says that similar incidents have been happening to the women, one of whom claims that she went to sleep and when she woke up found herself naked with her nightgown on the floor. Her husband “expressed ignorance” and the only conclusion that could possibly be drawn was that she was the victim of some esoteric tomfoolery. But the Chief says not to panic – he’s urged everyone to stay calm and “called on Government to help resolve the matter.”
...Alas, it seems that randy psychic witches are still regarded as quite common in modern Zambia. Back in May, the Mbala District Commissioner also felt compelled to ask local “wizards” to stop molesting teachers and pupils at Chipoka Primary School – the second of such incidents in nine years.
A TRADITIONAL leader says he has temporarily shelved plans to conduct a witch hunt to solve the mystery of a whole village of women who woke up without their knickers.
Chief Njelele of Gokwe abandoned the plan after one of his aides was involved in a bizarre mishap – spreading a fresh wave of terror in the troubled community.
Local headman Pauro had gathered villagers to discuss plans to bring a “prophet” to smoke out the suspected wizard who nicked the panties when a huge owl swooped just feet away and grabbed a mature male dog with its claws before disappearing in the distance.
Owls are associated with witchcraft and evil in superstitious Africa.
Chief Njelele said he feared whoever was behind the mysterious disappearance of the 26 undergarments – which were later found in a heap in the woods – was sending a warning.
“I had tasked the two village heads, Pauro and Charuseka, to meet their subjects with the aim of inviting a traditional healer to cleanse their areas,” the chief said.
“I then saw village head Pauro coming to my homestead with more strange news that a huge owl came flying from nowhere before picking up a male dog at his homestead and flew away while they were at a meeting.
“It’s mind boggling what is going on in the area.”
Now Chief Njelele says he is gathering a panel of wise men including other traditional leaders from neighbouring communities to try and bring peace to his troubled community.
Chiefs Nemangwe and Chireya will arrive for consultations this week.
According to Chief Njelele, on July 11 “the majority of women” in two local communities under village heads Pauro and Chariseka went to sleep with their panties on – but mysteriously woke up in the nude.
Seventeen women later positively identified their underwear in the presence of the police.
The chief explained: “Some have burnt the recovered panties while others said they would perform some rituals before disposing them.
“I am keeping the remaining nine at my own risk because as the leader, there is nothing I can do.”
Chief Njelele said he had received calls from women’s campaign groups who were planning a visit to the area, with plans to provide counseling and other support to the affected women.
Gokwe police said following discussions with the local leaders, they had decided to leave the community to find a traditional solution to the problem.
WOMEN in two villages in Gokwe, Midlands Province, are resting easy this weekend after the mystery of vanishing knickers was finally solved.
Local man Lumeck Ncube, 62, shocked neighbours after admitting that his “rogue” goblin was behind the mysterious disappearance of 26 panties overnight on July 11.
The women went to sleep in their underwear but woke up in the nude. The mystery only deepened when all 26 panties were discovered in a heap, dumped in the woods.
The goblin was captured, and then set on fire, in front of several hundred villagers during a witch-hunt organised by Chief Njelele on Wednesday.
An inyanga was brought in from Hwange and a self-styled prophet from an apostolic sect joined the cleansing ceremony.
The two men quickly identified Ncube as the source of the villagers’ troubles, forcing him to admit that he kept a goblin at his home.
The two witch hunters, Ncube, Chief Njelele and six aides then left the cleansing ceremony and proceeded to Ncube’s home where a goblin was retrieved from one of the bedrooms.
Correspondents described a "very short, decorated, human-like creature wearing blue female panties". Silvia Marumbe, the wife of the village headman, identified the underwear as hers.
Marume told the gathered crowd that her panties vanished in 2004 – suggesting the goblin had been at it for nearly a decade.
The creature was later burnt before the huge crowd as police were forced to step in to protect Ncube from being physically attacked.
Ncube said he bought the goblin in Chakari, near Kadoma, in 1983 while working in Kwekwe.
"When I bought this goblin, my purpose was to improve my luck in life,” he told the crowd. “I wanted to get promoted at my work as well as acquiring wealth but the goblin did not perform to my expectations.”
The goblin had turned “rogue”, showing a growing appetite for sex and women’s lingerie.
“We were no longer on good terms (with the goblin),” he added.
Chief Njelele, who sought police permission to conduct the witch hunt warned: "People in my area need to behave and desist from engaging in witchcraft. Because of this strange missing panties saga, my area is now known the world over for the wrong reasons, which is a shame.
I am that goblin.
Herein lies the true shame. Are we not called to forgive rogue goblins, 70 X 7 times!? Oh, the humanity!!!
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