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Goodbye, testosterone
Buffalo News ^ | 1.28.03 | JANE KWIATKOWSKI

Posted on 01/28/2003 5:15:28 PM PST by NYpeanut

Feeling anxious? Irritable, too? Has the stamina that used to fuel days and burn up the nights hit the road - along with a sex drive that has long been stuck in neutral?

Check your engines, gentlemen. There are thousands of males out there in the same sorry state, but now - thanks to a research scientist in Scotland - the condition has a name.

"Irritable Male Syndrome," that state of hypersensitivity, frustration and anger is now used to describe men who suffer from testosterone deficiency. And while the condition may have been around for ages, the diagnosis suggests that men may be just as vulnerable to the complexities of biology as women.

"This is very common," said Dr. Philip Aliotta. "Low levels of testosterone manifest in irritability, depression, weak muscles, loss of self-esteem. Men have no interest in the joys of life. Their libido has dropped. Their interest in intimacy is declining. Sexual function diminishes. Work performance suffers. Oftentimes they are misdiagnosed as being depressed.

"It's called a lot of names," added the Amherst urologist who has treated scores of men with testosterone replacement therapy. "It's the aging process. It's andropause. But Irritable Male Syndrome? I find that offensive. It implies we are walking around ready to beat up people."

At age 41, Nick Constantino knew something was wrong. The even-tempered insurance broker found himself getting more and more grouchy, chalking up his snarly demeanor to lack of sleep. After all, he was still adapting to his new lifestyle. Just a few years into his first marriage, the former bachelor in one swoop had become husband and father of three. No wonder his energy level was down, he rationalized. But one night last December as he was watching television, a commercial cried out to him.

"You could have knocked me off the couch," Constantino recalled during a phone interview from his home in Middletown. "Everything was me: tired, irritable, reduced sexual desire. I had been attributing a lot of it to just getting older. I called my doctor the next day and went in for a blood test."

The testing determined that Constantino was testosterone deficient, operating on levels that were two-thirds below normal. Hormone replacement therapy was suggested, and now - 45 days into the treatment - Constantino believes the patch that adorns his arm is working.

For years, menopausal women have taken hormone replacement therapy, using patches that secrete estrogen into their bodies. Now men are seeking the same hormonal elixir to revive their lagging sex lives and boost their energy.

"A lot of it is age-related," said urologist Aliotta. "But women can go through menopause at an early age, and men in their 30s and 40s can have testes that fail them. There's not a whole heck of a lot that makes the sexes different. The same physiology flows through men and women.

"Generally, they start in their 40s, complaining of sexual dysfunction," Aliotta said. "They tell you they have no interest in sex and they don't understand why. Their significant other may be relieved or upset. If the significant other doesn't understand, they tend to personalize it and all hell breaks loose in a relationship."

Testosterone is a hormone made in the testes under the guidance of signals from the pituitary gland. It surges through the body controlling male sexuality. Without it, puberty in boys would not take place. Neither would sexual performance. It is in fact erectile dysfunction that brings many men to their doctors' offices.

"I am a firm believer that when you have a problem, you go to the doctor," said John, a former railroad brakeman from Amherst, who asked his last name not be used in this story. "I was irritable. Small things were bothering me that I normally would not be concerned about."

At age 61, John is a diabetic with a heart condition and was advised against Viagra by his doctor, yet he simply could not perform sexually. After consulting with his urologist, John began receiving monthly injections of testosterone.

"It's worked fine," he said. "And I tell my friends about it, too. It's a thing that men don't like talking about, but they like hearing it. I'm not going back to where I was in my 20s, but I do have more desire."

This so-called testosterone revolution is not without drawbacks, doctors caution. Just as hormone therapy for women has been linked to increased risk of breast cancer, stroke and heart disease, testosterone therapy could trigger prostate cancer, as well as increase the danger of blood clotting. Also, as Aliotta pointed out, since testosterone is directly linked to prostate growth, men with prostate cancer are unlikely candidates for hormone replacement therapy. In addition, younger men - in their 30s and 40s - who are testosterone deficient may be at risk for developing osteoporosis.

Aliotta offers testosterone replacement in one of three forms:

• patch, daily

• gel, colorless and most often applied daily to the abdomen or chest

• injections, monthly or biweekly

Carol Conklin, a clinical social worker with City Gate Counseling Center, specializes in relationships in crisis. Many of her clients who report incidents of erectile dysfunction are hesitant to speak out, she said.

"I see men whose testosterone seems to be waning, who may get into addictive behavior such as Internet pornography and sexual addiction," Conklin said. "But when you think about irritability, anger is its bigger piece, the only valid emotion men grow up with."

The term "Irritable Male Syndrome" was first coined in spring 2002 by a scientist in Edinburgh, Scotland. An expert on human reproductive science, Gerald Lincoln of the Medical Research Council came up with the term after studying the mating cycle of Soay sheep. In autumn, Lincoln found that the rams' testosterone levels soared and they mated. In the winter testosterone levels fell, and the rams became nervous, withdrawn and disinterested in sex. Lincoln has also observed similar behavioral changes in red deer, reindeer and Indian elephants.

Author Jed Diamond is writing a book on men who suffer from Irritable Male Syndrome. Men, he states, express their symptoms in two ways.

"It can be "acted out' or "acted in,' " Diamond writes. "Sometimes men express these feelings outwardly, becoming angry, blaming, defensive or demanding. At other times the irritability is turned within and they feel anxious, tense, sad or troubled. Many times men go back and forth and their relationship becomes an emotional roller coaster."

Many of these troubled men and their significant others seek counseling, according to an area psychotherapist.

"One of the manifestations is anger," said Andre Toth. "And people are characterized as being moody all of a sudden. It's not only related to sexuality, but the general aging process.

"Men have always been lousy at expressing sadness," Toth added. "We are much better at anger. When we don't know what to do, we get angry. It's our middle name."


TOPICS: Miscellaneous
KEYWORDS:
Not male bashing, just trying to help. I may gingerly tacking this to the fridge; then again, maybe not.
1 posted on 01/28/2003 5:15:28 PM PST by NYpeanut
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To: NYpeanut
Going off to watch one of my favorite men now, no problem with GWB's testosterone levels or temperment.
2 posted on 01/28/2003 5:16:43 PM PST by NYpeanut
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To: NYpeanut
I said Goodbye to that when I got married......

So I refer all questions to my Brains State Department.....
3 posted on 01/28/2003 5:17:25 PM PST by cmsgop ( Arby's says no more Horsey Sauce for Scott Ritter !!!!)
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To: NYpeanut
Are you sure they haven't confused this with AWM, the angry white male syndrome? Good heavens, I just become comfortable with one insult and they morph it to another syndrome. I'm also suffering from syndrome overload.
4 posted on 01/28/2003 5:21:37 PM PST by DoughtyOne
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To: DoughtyOne
Join the club, brother. Whenever I tell the janitor my office is too warm he says I'm menopausal. Then I get grouchy, which means my testosterone levels are low?
5 posted on 01/28/2003 5:27:01 PM PST by NYpeanut
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To: NYpeanut
For the last ten years I've blamed the Clintons for my increased irritability and now your telling me it was hormones? Ayyyy carumba! Does this mean I'm going to drop Free Republic?
6 posted on 01/28/2003 5:38:59 PM PST by concentric circles (Pssst! Need some gel? Or you gonna shoot it straight?)
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To: NYpeanut; All
Interesting topic, but as a middle-aged male (47), I'd like to offer another possible or maybe just a corollary cause for the symptoms described above.

Let's talk about two things, actually: "hope" and "interest". First, "hope". How many men my age and older (ok, even younger) find themselves in lives that they despise? They are in jobs they dislike intensely, dead-end or otherwise. They start to feel that the dreams they had as younger men just probably aren't going to come true. They get up......have some coffee, read a paper (scan FR?), shower/dress, and commute to a job they don't give a flying fiddler's damn about but pays the bills. They find themselves and their families in lifestyles that demand a certain income level, so they don't dare take what have become "unnecessary risks" any more. I consider this a form of "male neutering", harsh as that may sound. Too many of us become slaves to a "lifestyle" vs. working in a field that provides true satisfaction..............hope for a satisfying, fulfilling career.

As far as "interest" is concerned........and this one may be dicey, but I do NOT intend to insult either men OR women with this little theory / observation.

Maybe the men aren't as interested in sex because that woman they married 20+ years ago just doesn't interest them sexually any longer. Maybe she put on 30 pounds in the intervening years and doesn't take care of herself otherwise.........or JUST as likely, same thing happened to him. so her lack of interest in him is manifested, so he loses interest in her.

IOW, they stop giving a damn about how they look to each other........how attractive they are to each other.........how to be romantic. It's hard to be aroused by a woman who simply cannot arouse you. Take the guys in the article and plop them in front of a nubile 25-year-old and I guarantee that in the majority of cases, you won't see any sign of "sexual dysfunction". Both sexes are guilty of this. It takes work, it takes effort on behalf of both in a marriage.

Trouble is, too many are just too damned lazy to care enough to rectify the situation. That's a sad fact. Hit the gym? Can't be bothered; too time consuming. Diet? Forget it; never works. Get off the sofa and put away the remote control? Well gee, what else am I going to do on a Saturday evening?

People allow themselves to get "comfortable".....and they shouldn't.

I consider myself very, very fortunate in that area, for I've been married to a stunningly beautiful 6' blonde for 25 years (next month) and has given me 7 beautiful children. I want her every bit as much now as I did 25 years ago.......if not more. I try to do things to see to it that I'm worthy of her attention as well.

None of the above necessarily involves a lack of testosterone........but I'll add (as delicately as possible) that due to a cancer scare some years ago and resultant surgery, I'm now producing exactly half the testosterone I was before that surgery. Didn't change a thing. Oh......as for the first, I love what I do for a living and do all that I can to be damned good at it. I challenge myself far more than any "boss" ever could, and I love exceeding my own goals in that job.

Hope this helps somebody.

7 posted on 01/28/2003 5:51:51 PM PST by RightOnline
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To: NYpeanut; aculeus; general_re; BlueLancer; hellinahandcart
This kind of post really ticks me off. So does everything else nowadays.

Hmmmmmmm . . . . . . . . . . .

;-)

8 posted on 01/28/2003 5:56:39 PM PST by dighton
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To: dighton; aculeus; hellinahandcart; BlueLancer
A new set of neuticles plus heavy alcohol consumption will fix your mood right up... ;)
9 posted on 01/28/2003 6:21:06 PM PST by general_re (A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.)
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To: dighton; general_re; Poohbah; BlueLancer; hellinahandcart
... according to an area psychotherapist.

Specialist in treating agoraphobia?

10 posted on 01/28/2003 6:32:53 PM PST by aculeus
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To: RightOnline
Interesting topic, but as a middle-aged male (47), I'd like to offer another possible or maybe just a corollary cause for the symptoms described above.

Actually, I think another way to sum up what you've described is to say that these people have become average -- just like any other middle aged person. It takes a strong desire to do something in life to keep yourself moving ahead.

11 posted on 01/28/2003 7:53:00 PM PST by webstersII
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To: NYpeanut
He he he, that janitor probably has someone on the other side carping about it being too cold. LOL And he's pulling his hair out and writing on his forum that he just can't please everyone. You take care. ;)
12 posted on 01/28/2003 7:53:20 PM PST by DoughtyOne
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To: NYpeanut
"Men have always been lousy at expressing sadness," Toth added. "We are much better at anger. When we don't know what to do, we get angry. It's our middle name."

" anger is ... the only valid emotion men grow up with"

If men are "lousy" at expressing sadness, only emoting anger, how does one account for the music, literature, architecture, engineering, and art that suggests that men are capable of a profound range of emotion, beyond angry/sad? And how do you account for the many 10's of millions of men that slide into middle age, make less testosterone, get laid less, and yet avoid becoming reactive emotional clods, and still manage to make their 40's and up the best years of their lives? Also, why is it supposed that men have to express emotions, particularly sadness, in a manner consistent with females for that emotion to be valid? Just because I am not over there whining on your shoulder doesn't mean I can't feel sad.

Damn, there I go, getting all emotional. Time to change my patch.

13 posted on 01/28/2003 8:48:33 PM PST by spodefly (This is my tag line. There are many like it, but this one is mine.)
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To: RightOnline
You make very valid points, but the article very closely describes my husband of 5 months. He's 49 and I'm 48; we lived together a number of years before making it legal, and I've got to say that he isn't the man I met.
14 posted on 01/29/2003 3:02:22 AM PST by LuLuLuLu (I can't ever think of a clever tag line.)
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To: All
Having crossed that age line a while back might I suggest that perhaps there's just a bit of boomer narcissism here? Trying to be the person you were at 40 when you're 50 will depress you, instead focus on the things you learned between 40 and 50 and how much wiser you are (hopefully!).

It reminds me of when I was a kid, my dad could always beat me at basketball. Why? I was faster, I could jump higher, etc. than he was. I asked him. He said that when he was a kid he used speed, as he got older and the speed left he started using his big butt to block people out. I've never forgotten that, growing older gracefully and leveraging what you have.

Hey, it's the cycle of life that God gave us. Enjoy every minute of it, even the bad parts because without the bad parts you won't know what the good parts are.
15 posted on 01/29/2003 3:17:17 AM PST by Proud_texan
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To: LuLuLuLu
I appreciate your comments......and I'm sorry to hear that. To what do you attribute such a change? Not to......umm............well, you obviously love the guy enough to have married him and quite recently, at that. Do you think it's a matter of such therapy, or.........? Just curious here, not trying to be nosey. I've heard other women say the same thing many times and have always wondered.......
16 posted on 01/29/2003 4:09:04 AM PST by RightOnline
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To: RightOnline; NYpeanut
"None of the above necessarily involves a lack of testosterone........but I'll add (as delicately as possible) that due to a cancer scare some years ago and resultant surgery, I'm now producing exactly half the testosterone I was before that surgery. Didn't change a thing."

Well, in part it depends on what the original level was. Half of 700 is a lot better than half of 300. Then again, you may be one of those lucky souls who has a more efficient biochemistry, and need less to get the same effect.

Unfortuantely, for many people, the problem is very real, and in many cases, either undiagonosed or wrongly diagnosed. I've got the problem, and my level had dropped to less than 100 (normal range is 300-1000ug/dl), and in fact I had developed a "skipped pulse" heart rhythm. Fortunately, my physician recognized that "heart rhythm" tic as a potential symptom of low testosterone, and had a blood test done (after sending me to a cardiologist to be sure nothing else was going on). On seeing the results she gave me a testosterone shot, and the effect was magical. The heart rhythm problem disappeared IMMEDIATELY, and a lot of other nebulous irritations/physical complaints also vanished. Amazingly enough, I was NOT having signifcant problems with libido/sexuality at the time.

I suspect that many older males who develop these heart rhythm abnormalities and get put on medications to "regularize the heartbeat" (George Bush I, for instance) are actually suffering from a drop in testosterone.

The article doesn't mention the BEST method of supplementation, with is an under-the-skin timed release implant done every six months, but it is difficult to find a doctor who 1) knows about the procedure, and 2) is willing to do it.

17 posted on 01/29/2003 5:15:57 AM PST by Wonder Warthog
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To: NYpeanut
Exogenous testosterone is NOT a good solution! As soon as these men stop taking the steroids, they will go right back to the way they were, and probably even be worse off. Their bodies will have compensated by making even LESS hormone, it's a vicious cycle.

I've recently read a very well documented book called Natural Hormonal Enhancement. The website of the author is http://www.extique.com (it looks a little hyped online, but it really is a great read and well researched).
18 posted on 01/29/2003 5:48:58 AM PST by Marie Antoinette (Not a smoker, nor much of a drinker, but I can FReep with the best of 'em!)
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To: Marie Antoinette
"Exogenous testosterone is NOT a good solution! As soon as these men stop taking the steroids, they will go right back to the way they were, and probably even be worse off. Their bodies will have compensated by making even LESS hormone, it's a vicious cycle."

I agree with you on the derivatized analogs of testosterone used in shots, but the testosterone used in the gel and time-release implants is the same as that produced by the body.

Your postulated "bad thing" only applies to weight-lifters and other steroid abusers who try to boost their testosterone to un-naturally high levels to build body mass. Bringing an un-naturally LOW testosterone level up to normal is another matter entirely. The reason you do that is your body no longer makes enough hormone. Those of us on hormone replacement therapy know we will be doing so indefinitely. Why would we stop??

19 posted on 01/29/2003 9:40:42 AM PST by Wonder Warthog
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To: RightOnline
What's changed? Nothing. (And i don't think you're being nosey at all.) In fact, my first thought was that the changes had something to do with being legal, but he assures me it's not. Matter of fact, I was more reluctant to tie the knot again than he was.

We have a good, comfortable life, and I've gone through the laundry list of externals that might be the problem.

His job? Stressful, but actually less so now than before. He works for a small company and for a couple of years the owners were paying salary out of their pockets, but that's changed.

Money? According to the Left we're rich, but we aren't. Together we constructed a budget at the beginning of the year that will find us debt free by mid fall (except for the house), so we don't have as much "play" money, but that's by choice. (And only have the debt because we're good Americans and took to heart Ws plea to keep the economy moving after 9/11 :) )

Our respective children are grown and self sufficient.

We live in the same house we did before we were married.

I'm the same height and weight I've been since I was 18, excluding pregnancies, and even though middle age has made me a little softer, I'm on the low end of the weight scale at 120 at 5"6". I'll never be on the cover of a magazine, but I don't need to wear a paper bag over my head, either.

So... I don't think it's external. TBT, I've been thinking brain tumor or something along those lines. Since I met him, Mr. Lu has been mild mannered almost to a fault. He's not a wimp; don't get me wrong. The black belt he holds, he earned. But, like most of us in middle age, he'd learned to let the little sh*t slide.

Lately, however, he's morphed into someone I don't know at all. Someone who will throw shoes (that had been snowcovered and left in the sunroom to dry) because they weren't in the closet. Someone who won't cook (something he loves to do) because a serving dish was not put in the proper place. Strange, irrational behavior.

Am I sure that he's suffering from the syndrome mentioned in the article? Nope, not at all. It just really struck a chord with me.

But back to your point, RightOnline, I think many, many people hit their 40s and 50s and just get bored with who they are because they've spent the prior 20 or 30 years being the same person they were in high school or college.

I thought I had it right this time, with this man, and frankly, I'm scared to death that what I'm seeing is more than hormonal changes.
20 posted on 01/30/2003 2:08:18 PM PST by LuLuLuLu (I can't ever think of a clever tag line.)
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To: RightOnline
spot on post.
21 posted on 01/30/2003 2:09:22 PM PST by Semaphore Heathcliffe
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To: NYpeanut
But Irritable Male Syndrome? I find that offensive. It implies we are walking around ready to beat up people."

".... And in fact, you pansy-ass little reporter geek, I think I'd like to kick your teeth down your throat."

22 posted on 01/30/2003 2:23:11 PM PST by r9etb
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To: RightOnline
I'm now producing exactly half the testosterone I was before that surgery. Didn't change a thing.

Except that you no longer have to shave your eyelids, toenails, and teeth.... ;-)

23 posted on 01/30/2003 2:26:01 PM PST by r9etb
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To: NYpeanut
I AM NOT IRRITABLE!!
24 posted on 01/30/2003 2:28:46 PM PST by Billthedrill
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To: Billthedrill
Our sex life is mostly oral ,.... we pass each other in the hall and say "hey screw you ".
25 posted on 01/30/2003 2:36:52 PM PST by DainBramage
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To: DainBramage
Helmets, cups and facemasks are now being given out at the local Health dept. As long as you are going to do it(gawd knows married couples can't be stopped), use protection.
26 posted on 01/30/2003 2:50:37 PM PST by jeremiah (Sunshine scares all of them, for they all are cockaroaches)
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To: RightOnline
Maybe she put on 30 pounds in the intervening years and doesn't take care of herself otherwise

I like your theory.

Something I have noted..
If you know a married woman or perhaps one in a relationship that suddenly starts losing weight, buying new clothes, generally 'fixin' herself up, she is getting ready to make the 'break'.( This may hold true for men also)

On the other hand, I like men having our very own syndrome. It wasn't fair that women had PMS, post-partum syndrome, etc. to blame their action on.
Now, if I do something stupid I'll use the IMS defense.(G)

27 posted on 01/30/2003 3:05:05 PM PST by Vinnie
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To: jeremiah
I use protection, little cotton balls stuffed in my ears.
28 posted on 01/30/2003 3:10:02 PM PST by DainBramage
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To: Vinnie
If you know a married woman or perhaps one in a relationship that suddenly starts losing weight, buying new clothes, generally 'fixin' herself up, she is getting ready to make the 'break'.

Interesting...shows emotional immaturity.

29 posted on 01/30/2003 3:49:38 PM PST by Dr. Zoo
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To: r9etb
"Except that you no longer have to shave your eyelids, toenails, and teeth.... ;-)"

Actually, right afterward, I told family / friends that I was just fine, etc., etc.............except I had this indescribable urge to match sofa and wallpaper patterns......:)

30 posted on 01/30/2003 4:36:22 PM PST by RightOnline
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To: LuLuLuLu
and I've got to say that he isn't the man I met

Wellllp...I married a Ralph Cramden, Archie Bunker, Fred Flintstone sorta guy. Man, I am hoping he couldn't get grumpier, my sister always told me he'd mellow with age!

31 posted on 01/30/2003 4:43:23 PM PST by riri
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To: LuLuLuLu
Interesting........and I appreciate you sharing that. Not sure what it could be since I don't know your husband (if I did, I'd have a far better shot at figuring it out). Those little irritants that have suddenly sprung up in his life? You're right; that's masking something else. I keep hearing about "male menopause", but damned if I know if it's for real. Still, it does sound like this article may provide a big hint, and it would behoove him to see a doc and check it out. Hey..........just tell him "what the hell; nothing to lose, right?" No surgery involved, etc., etc......and the benefits to you both could be significant. I wish you and him all the best either way.
32 posted on 01/31/2003 3:57:15 AM PST by RightOnline
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To: LuLuLuLu
You make very valid points, but the article very closely describes my husband of 5 months. He's 49 and I'm 48; we lived together a number of years before making it legal, and I've got to say that he isn't the man I met.

Please don't take offense, but "You aren't the man I married/met" always appears to me to be the biggest cop-out in the planet. You marry that man, but you discover he has faults (tragic or otherwise), and/or he changes. You must want to WORK on the marriage, which it sounds like you are willing to do.

33 posted on 01/31/2003 4:14:15 AM PST by Lazamataz (Never assume anything. There are no givens.)
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To: LuLuLuLu
He needs a vacation. By himself or with other men. If he won't take one, YOU take one with your friends. After the kids leave, couples tend to spend way too much time together. Men need other men for companionship and accountability.

I'm the same height and weight I've been since I was 18, excluding pregnancies, and even though middle age has made me a little softer, I'm on the low end of the weight scale at 120 at 5"6". I'll never be on the cover of a magazine, but I don't need to wear a paper bag over my head, either.

Honestly, your husband probably doesn't care as much about this as you care. I don't know how to put this gently but when the lights go out, it all kinda looks the same and a little softening is a good thing.

34 posted on 01/31/2003 4:29:38 AM PST by AppyPappy (Will Code COBOL For Food)
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To: Lazamataz
Women marry men hoping they will change and men marry women hoping they will stay the same.
35 posted on 01/31/2003 4:30:12 AM PST by AppyPappy (Will Code COBOL For Food)
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To: AppyPappy
Women marry men hoping they will change and men marry women hoping they will stay the same.

Marriage is a nice institution, but who wants to be institutionalized?

36 posted on 01/31/2003 4:32:36 AM PST by Lazamataz (Never assume anything.)
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To: Lazamataz
Honeymoon's over, huh?

Your commitment is to the marriage, not the person. The person will change.

37 posted on 01/31/2003 4:35:04 AM PST by AppyPappy (Will Code COBOL For Food)
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To: Lazamataz
Not to qiuibble, but we lived together for 4 years, and I was quite aware of his habits, good AND bad. The good far outweigh the bad, both in habits and predilictions.

We took a bike trip to New Orleans in August and were married there. After a great week in the Big Easy, we came home via the Blue Ridge, and had a wonderful time, even freezing our butts off. A couple of weeks later, we went to England and Wales for a couple of weeks, and managed the roundabouts quite well, and again spent most of our time laughing. He was called to Belguim, so I came home alone. (Mentioned only because I'm not one to cling.)

I'm trying hard to not get defensive here, and I think that you men have very good points. And they would apply in a different situation. Mr. Lu travels for business a lot, and earlier this month needed to attend a conference in Florida. His children live there, and while I could have taken time off work and gone along, I thought it would be good for him to go alone. He did, and enjoyed himself. I stayed home and was fine with it.

He's travelled since I met him, and I have no problem with the time alone, something that really sets me apart from his ex. However, since his return from Florida, he's confusing me with her, and telling me that I DO have a problem, and I'm making his life miserable.

Being together too much isn't the point. We both work demanding jobs and up until recently, our time together was something to look forward to. But like I said in my other post, Mr. Lu has morphed into someone that he's just NOT. By his own admission last night, he realized that all the little life b!tches he's been complaining about are not the true issue. We just have to find out what IS.

I didn't post what I did to bash my husband, or men in general. I'm perfectly capable of doing that to his/their face(s). And I really appreciate the feedback, but it's off base. I only mentioned my height/weight b/c a number of posters talked about women gaining 30 lbs and such.

Someone upthread said that when a woman starts buying new clothes, losing weight, etc. means she's looking and wondered if it's true for men. It is. That's the reason my ex-husband is now single. I should have killed him, but he wasn't worth the bullet.

But anyway, thanks for the comments and feedback. To the person who sent me private mail, I'll keep you posted. For the rest of you, I truly hope you never have a physical problem that manifests itself emotionally.

Regards.
38 posted on 01/31/2003 2:34:04 PM PST by LuLuLuLu (I can't ever think of a clever tag line.)
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To: LuLuLuLu
Bump to you.
39 posted on 05/08/2003 5:15:41 PM PDT by Wonder Warthog (The Hog of Steel)
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To: Wonder Warthog
Thanks for the bump, Wonder. Sorry it's taken me so long to find the time to say what I want to say, but life keeps getting in the way.

To all of you who scoffed at the article and declared that a man's disinterest in his spouse was due to a change in her, you're wrong. Just plain wrong. And idiots to boot, but that's not the point right now.

As I posted earlier, the symptoms outlined in the article described my husband. More to appease me than because he truly believed anything was wrong, he went to the doctor. And guess what? His testosterone level was low. (Hard for some of you to believe that [ahem] real men [ahem] can have hormone problems, I know.)

Two months later, with daily medication, he's back to being the lovable maroon I married.

True thanks to the person who originally posted the article and to Wonder Warthog. Oh yeah, and to Al Gore for inventing the Internet so all this could happen.
40 posted on 05/17/2003 2:07:01 PM PDT by LuLuLuLu (I can't ever think of a clever tag line.)
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To: LuLuLuLu
"We took a bike trip to New Orleans in August and were married there. After a great week in the Big Easy, we came home via the Blue Ridge, and had a wonderful time, even freezing our butts off."

His problem could be physical. Do some research on the hazards of nerve damage in "sensitive" areas of some male cyclists.

Use your Google search engine and you'll read many articles confirming this. Very interesting.

Best of Luck, sw

41 posted on 05/17/2003 2:41:04 PM PDT by spectre (Spectre's wife)
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To: RightOnline
My 25th wedding anniversary is coming up June 9th. Our crop of kids stopped at 3 boys. A little bout with testicular cancer in 1985 put that on the skids. Surgery and 3000 rads of radiation. Maintaining my weight at normal levels has been a living hell since then. Weight is very hard to lose now. It takes exorbitant and constant levels of vigorous exercise to yield results that were effortless before the cancer episode. The tumor kicked the testosterone levels sky high in March 1985. I dropped from 192 to 162 with no effort by July 1985. It took me a year of skating 70 miles a week to duplicate the same result in 1996.
42 posted on 05/17/2003 7:41:58 PM PDT by Myrddin
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To: riri
Wellllp...I married a Ralph Cramden, Archie Bunker, Fred Flintstone sorta guy.

Whats the problem here?

43 posted on 05/17/2003 7:50:19 PM PDT by Archie Bunker on steroids
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