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What the world would like the president to say (This is a real GEM, don't miss it!)
WorldNetDaily ^ | Feb. 4, 2003 | Dennis Prager

Posted on 02/05/2003 6:51:05 PM PST by FairOpinion

My fellow Americans:

After consulting with our loyal allies in Europe, speaking with United Nations officials, reading major American newspapers, listening to National Public Radio, consulting with Hollywood movie stars, and meeting with professors from our universities, I have changed my mind.

They are right.

I now realize that the most important goal America and its president can pursue is to be liked, hopefully loved, by mankind – and especially by France, Germany, China and the Arab world.

I now realize that we Americans who think in terms of good and evil are simpletons. We should think, as the professors do, in multicultural terms and, therefore, render no moral judgment over Iraq or any other nation except Israel. Who am I to declare any regimes an "axis of evil"?

I now realize that it was arrogant to make such a judgment on three regimes governed by men whom I should have tried better to understand. Now that I realize America's primary goal is to be liked, I will never again call any regime evil. In fact, in consultation with the presidents and deans of our major universities, I have decided to rename the governments of Iraq, Iran and North Korea an Axis of Diversity.

I now realize that the only reason I ever considered putting thousands of young American lives in jeopardy was because of oil. I was deluded in thinking that Saddam Hussein might use his weapons of destruction against vast numbers of innocents, or to think because Saddam erased a sovereign nation from the map in 1991, he would contemplate doing such a thing again. The French have taught me that the way to deal with people whom I used to believe were evil is by giving them business contracts.

Yes, all these people knew better than I that I considered attacking Iraq only in order to obtain cheap gas for American SUVs. Even though it would have cost us far more money to topple Saddam Hussein than we would make from Iraqi oil. Even though I could simply have done what the French and Russians have done – make deals with Saddam to buy all the oil we want. And even though we publicly promised that after Saddam, Iraqi oil will belong to the Iraqi people.

Despite all that, the left somehow recognized that a war against Iraq was really only a way to enrich my oil buddies. The left, whom I used to foolishly identify with appeasing and defending evil, have opened my eyes. They are right that nothing America does is out of a sense of mission to lead humanity in confronting evil. That was all a cover up for our true motivation – more wealth. That is why we alone stand by Israel – for all that oil in the Negev. That is why we protect Taiwan – for Taiwan's bounteous natural resources. From now on, our moral model must be the Europeans who shape their Middle Eastern policies so as to be loved by 200 million Arabs rather than by a few million Israelis.

I now realize that America must be guided by Germany with its 100-year record of moral leadership; by France with nearly as long a record of standing up to evil; by our university professors, who almost alone in America understand that America and Israel are the world's villains; by the United Nations, which was so prescient in doing nothing during the Rwanda genocide and today provides more moral light with Syria on its Security Council and Libya heading its Human Rights Commission; by the New York Times and other newspapers that so insightfully attacked President Ronald Reagan for labeling the Soviet Union an evil empire; and by China, which I used to identify with cultural genocide in Tibet – but thanks to my new desire to be loved, I will now regard only as a huge potential source of love and cheap imports.

My fellow Americans, I will no longer be calling you "my fellow Americans," but rather, "my fellow earthlings" or "my fellow citizens of the world." Nor will I conclude this or any future address by asking that God bless America. That annoys secular Europe, and if we aim to be loved, we can no longer speak in religious terms.

Finally, given my new belief that America's task in the world is not to lead but to be loved, I have decided to step down from the presidency as soon as Congress and the states pass a constitutional amendment allowing Al Gore to be president. He, my predecessor President Clinton, and the whole Democratic Party have long believed that America's purpose is to be loved. They should be governing.

My fellow world citizens: peace and love.


TOPICS: Editorial; Foreign Affairs; News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: appeasement; bush; france; germany; iraq; un; war; worldopinion
I think this is a real gem. This is exactly what the wimps, and America haters in the world and in the US would like Bush to say and do, to become a "Wimp-in-Chief".

I think this article is terrific in its sarcasm, which is sadly true, this is the only thing that would make our enemies happy.

1 posted on 02/05/2003 6:51:05 PM PST by FairOpinion
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To: FairOpinion
Bump.
2 posted on 02/05/2003 6:57:19 PM PST by Rocko
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To: FairOpinion
Peace and love Bump!
3 posted on 02/05/2003 7:01:06 PM PST by F-117A
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To: Rocko
Yes, Dennis should run against Ms. Boxer and whup her.
4 posted on 02/05/2003 7:01:11 PM PST by maranatha
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To: FairOpinion
I think Timothy Leary was right. We should all take LSD--or the psychedelic of one's choice--and "tune in, turn on, and drop out". If Bush would just get with it, we could all be doing sex, drugs, and rock-and-roll right now! The Left would love it! It would be fun! Peace! I love ya, man. You too, Saddam. You too, Kim Chong-il. You too, Osama! Love! Lovvve. Loooooooooooovvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvzzzzzzzzzzz...
5 posted on 02/05/2003 7:02:34 PM PST by Savage Beast
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To: FairOpinion; Dog Gone
What a great humour piece! Thanks for posting it.

D
6 posted on 02/05/2003 7:03:51 PM PST by daviddennis (Visit amazing.com for protest accounts, video & more!)
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To: FairOpinion
Absolutely nails the antiwar nitwits. Destroys their arguments better than any recitation of facts and logic--makes you wonder if Ann Coulter had anything to do with writing it....nahhh, not incendiary enough!
7 posted on 02/05/2003 7:09:32 PM PST by HassanBenSobar
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To: daviddennis
I have one brother who would like Bush to say this in all seriousness.

I'm going to have to kick his butt again, just like I did when he was 5 years old and I was 10.

8 posted on 02/05/2003 7:11:11 PM PST by Dog Gone
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To: FairOpinion
Let US have 3-4 weeks of unrestricted, unescorted time to locate WMD.This means U-2 flyovers, large, military search teams and free access to all scientists. If we don't find anything, we pull back our troops, and lift sanctions. If we do find anything,Saddam surrenders and goes to jail. Saddam has a losing hand and it''s time to put the cards on the table.(I don't think he would go for it)
9 posted on 02/05/2003 7:12:19 PM PST by airborne
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To: HassanBenSobar
BIG BUMPITY BUMP in the night.....but didn't Bill Clintoon already make that speech?????
10 posted on 02/05/2003 7:14:36 PM PST by snickeroon
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To: HassanBenSobar
After consulting with our loyal allies in Europe, speaking with United Nations officials, reading major American newspapers, listening to National Public Radio, consulting with Hollywood movie stars, and meeting with professors from our universities, I have changed my mind. The Axis Of Quislers ... the democrat obstructionists, The Axis Of Acorns, the bitter little nuts unfit for consumption ... sorry Dennis, you're too spot on to be amusing, buddy. I lu ya man. [I need a shower now ...]
11 posted on 02/05/2003 7:17:33 PM PST by MHGinTN (If you can read this, you've had life support from someone. Promote Life Support for others.)
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To: FairOpinion
OK, fellow peaceniks, a little mental game here.

Queation: If Saddam were to promise to be real, real nice, not to abuse the Kurds or the Iranians or the Kuwaitis any more, to empty the prison camps and the torture chambers, give up the chemical and biological weapons, and only nuke Paris...

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

...how many nukes should we give him?

12 posted on 02/05/2003 7:18:31 PM PST by Billthedrill
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To: airborne
Oh for heavens sake, just make the place a parking lot and be done with it!!
13 posted on 02/05/2003 7:19:18 PM PST by CyberAnt ( Yo! Syracuse)
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To: daviddennis
What's really terrifying is that speech could have been delivered, for real, by Al Gore.
14 posted on 02/05/2003 7:22:56 PM PST by WorkingClassFilth (Defund NPR, PBS and the LSC.)
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To: Dog Gone
You better be careful in trying to kick your little brother's butt. There's 5 years difference between my "little" brother and I. I used to kick his butt all the time. That was even true when we were both in our 20s.

Not anymore. I went into white colloar jobs and became soft. He went into manual labor and became as hard as a rock.

Now, when he speaks to me I answer, "Yes, sir," and "No, sir!" :-)
15 posted on 02/05/2003 7:27:20 PM PST by PatriotGames (AOOGHA AOOGHA CLEAR THE BRIDGE! DIVE! DIVE!)
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To: FairOpinion
Priceless!

Peace Man!!!!!(Now let's go kick some butt)

16 posted on 02/05/2003 7:30:44 PM PST by Cold Heat
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To: FairOpinion
My favorite line -

"I now realize that America must be guided by Germany with its 100-year record of moral leadership; by France with nearly as long a record of standing up to evil"

This says it all!

17 posted on 02/05/2003 7:32:41 PM PST by BossLady
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To: FairOpinion
After consulting with our loyal allies in Europe, speaking with United Nations officials, reading major American newspapers, listening to National Public Radio, consulting with Hollywood movie stars, and meeting with professors from our universities, I have changed my mind.

I was listening to All Things Considered on NPR on the way home this afternoon, and they actually seem to have been convinced by Colin Powell's speech at the U.N. today. FWIW.

18 posted on 02/05/2003 7:34:53 PM PST by Amelia (Who's sending missile parts to Iraq?)
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To: PatriotGames
He's a liberal California college professor, and I outweigh him today by probably 40 lbs.

Earlier this year he asked me why I had such a problem with Daniel Ortega and communists.

I love him, but I wanted to take him out right then.

19 posted on 02/05/2003 7:40:24 PM PST by Dog Gone
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To: Dog Gone
I have one brother who would like Bush to say this in all seriousness.

He may be saying this mainly to get your goat. At our house we view sibling rivalry on a daily basis.

20 posted on 02/05/2003 7:40:33 PM PST by The_Media_never_lie
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To: FairOpinion
Me am Bizarro!

-PJ

21 posted on 02/05/2003 7:43:26 PM PST by Political Junkie Too
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To: BossLady
Yep... I hear ya...

But WE'RE the bullies, remember?? Look at all the countries we have brutally colonized after we liberated them or helped them deter an attack. Look how we stayed in Kuwait, stole all their oil, marched those last few miles into Baghdad in 1991, kicked Saddam out, stole Iraq's oil.... hey.... wait a minute....

Tammy

22 posted on 02/05/2003 7:43:48 PM PST by Tamzee (There are 10 types of people... those who read binary, and those who don't.)
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To: wirestripper
Peace Man!!!!!(Now let's go kick some butt)

----
This reminded my of the flash cartoon "Diplomacy" to use with Bin Laden. I think we can use the same with Saddam. This kind of "diplomacy" I can stand behind. ;)

http://politicalhumor.about.com/gi/dynamic/offsite.htm?site=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.mikeoverbeck.com%2Fosama%2Fdiplomacy.html
23 posted on 02/05/2003 7:44:48 PM PST by FairOpinion
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To: Tamsey
LOL. Oh ya.....now I remember....how it REALLY happened..... I need to throw away my revisionist books on the subject. /sarcasm
24 posted on 02/05/2003 7:46:10 PM PST by BossLady
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To: Dog Gone
I have one brother who would like Bush to say this in all seriousness.

I feel your pain

25 posted on 02/05/2003 7:51:00 PM PST by apackof2 (God Bless America, God Bless Our Troops)
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To: The_Media_never_lie
My brother told me that it is immoral for our generation to use non-renewable energy sources like oil. (I work in the oil industry.)

I immediately asked him what exactly he wanted to save the oil for.

26 posted on 02/05/2003 7:51:45 PM PST by Dog Gone
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To: FairOpinion
AH LLLUUUUVVVVV EEEYYYYOOOOUUU , MMMAANN!!!
27 posted on 02/05/2003 7:54:50 PM PST by Cvengr
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To: FairOpinion
Personally, I like "The bombings will begin in five minutes".
28 posted on 02/05/2003 8:00:20 PM PST by Blood of Tyrants (Even if the government took all your earnings, you wouldn’t be, in its eyes, a slave)
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To: Dog Gone
That's good--I'll have to remember it.
29 posted on 02/05/2003 8:32:19 PM PST by basil
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To: Blood of Tyrants
That sounds like a play on an old Bill Cosby line.
30 posted on 02/05/2003 8:38:44 PM PST by LiteKeeper
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To: .30Carbine
FYRE
31 posted on 02/05/2003 8:44:57 PM PST by TigersEye
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To: LiteKeeper
Actually, it was a joke that the great Ronald Reagan used once when a sound man asked him to say something into the mike to make sure that it was working. The liberals who saw it just about had heart attacks.
32 posted on 02/05/2003 8:45:18 PM PST by Blood of Tyrants (Even if the government took all your earnings, you wouldn’t be, in its eyes, a slave)
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To: Blood of Tyrants
About 20-30 years ago, Bill Cosby taped a one-man show, I believe called "Himself". At one point, after listening to his kids for quite awhile trying to get ready for bed, he yells upstairs, "Let the beatings begin!"
33 posted on 02/05/2003 9:10:18 PM PST by LiteKeeper
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To: LiteKeeper
LOL! My kids listen to that tape and laugh hysterically.
34 posted on 02/06/2003 5:28:38 AM PST by Blood of Tyrants (Even if the government took all your earnings, you wouldn’t be, in its eyes, a slave)
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