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Rick Perry weighs in on Rogen, dexterous fowl, and more. FunnyOrDie ~ Bad Lip Reading

DES MOINES, Iowa — Republican presidential hopeful Newt Gingrich said he supports a peace agreement between Israel and the Palestinians that includes two separate states, but he did not step back Saturday from his assertion that Palestinians are an “invented” people, an incendiary comment that infuriated one side in the Mideast peace process. The burden to show a willingness to reach a peace accord with the Israelis lies squarely with the Palestinians, he said. “When the president keeps talking about a peace process while Hamas keeps firing missiles into Israel, if we had a country next to us firing missiles,...

NEW YORK (AP) — Brace yourselves for the attack ads. Rick Perry's Social Security plan might cost Florida its entire public education and prison systems. Mitt Romney is the flip-flopper responsible for "Obamacare." Or so declare just two presidential campaign videos on the Web. Going after the president and each other, Republican candidates have been test-driving themes and previewing attack lines online for months, foreshadowing the TV ad war that's all but certain to start soon in Iowa, New Hampshire and other early voting states. With less than three months before voting begins in GOP nomination contests, the candidates' pitches...

Herman Cain, the man who has pulled even in the GOP presidential polls with Texas Gov. Rick Perry was in the governor’s backyard Thursday, signing books in College Station and The Woodlands and giving a speech in Houston. The former pizza executive has climbed from interesting also-ran to top-tier candidate in the last few weeks, buoyed by strong debate performances, a congenial public persona and conservative voters’ reluctance to give their heart to the long-running frontrunner, Mitt Romney. In the latest Washington Post/ABC News poll, Cain is tied for second place with Perry with 17 percent of the vote. Romney...

When Rick Perry threw his hat into the ring for the Republican presidential nomination, it set off such a collective cringe among liberal Texans that it likely scored on the Richter scale. Being a native Texan with basic respect for modern civilisation means living in a constant state of low-grade humiliation, as the state's size provides an interrupted stream of news stories highlighting the cranks and Bible-thumpers who win state and local offices – but a presidential campaign means exponentially expanding the amount of national and international attention paid to the streak of mean-spirited ignorance that rules Texas politics. With...

MANCHESTER, N.H. — Republican presidential contender Ron Paul likened fellow Texan Rick Perry to a “candidate of the week” on Friday and said his Republican opponent’s poll numbers would fall quickly once voters get to know him better. “He was the one saying, ‘Oh yeah, I’m all for secession,’ and that kind of talk,” Paul told The Associated Press. “The only thing I would advise is looking into him, looking at his record, and not just taking him at face value. Texas has had a lot of changes in these last eight years, not exactly positive either.” In a 2009...

GALVESTON — A jogger on Galveston Island discovered a bag in the surf Tuesday containing 25 bricks of cocaine with an estimated street value of $2 million. The jogger, whose name police are withholding, discovered the bag about 9:30 a.m. near Indian Beach, police spokesman Cpt. Jeff Heyse said. He lugged the heavy bag to his residence and slashed it open to find 25 bricks of cocaine, each weighing 1 kilogram or 2.2 pounds, bundled in plastic wrap and rubber, Heyse said. Recognizing the packages as cocaine from television programs, the jogger phoned police, Heyse said.

Whatever happened to Captain Planet? Apparently he he got fat, drunk and mean. Captain Planet Eats Birds, Kills Children, Burns Planet

The case of a Mexican man scheduled to be executed on Thursday in Texas threatens to disrupt U.S. diplomatic relations abroad and creates a politically volatile dilemma for Republican Gov. Rick Perry, who is considering a run for president. Unless Perry or the U.S. Supreme Court intervenes to stay the execution, Texas plans to execute Humberto Leal Jr. at 6 p.m. Central Time for the 1994 murder of 16-year-old Adria Sauceda. The International Court of Justice ruled in 2004 that the United States violated the rights of Leal and more than three dozen other Mexican nationals on death row because...

LOS ANGELES — Texas Gov. Rick Perry, who has been mentioned as a potential Republican presidential candidate, is accusing the Obama administration of transforming abortion into a U.S. export and breaking faith with the nation's founding principles by supporting taxpayer-funded embryonic stem cell research. Perry, a prominent conservative long at odds with President Barack Obama's stand on reproductive rights and stem cell research, spoke Sunday to a mostly Hispanic crowd of about 5,000 at a Los Angeles anti-abortion rally.

At first, Adrian Bias had no reason to be suspicious when his neighbor, Noe Morin, came to his home Sunday morning and asked him to fix his chain saw. Bias repaired the chain saw and returned it to Morin, who asked Bias if he could trust him, according to court documents. Bias said yes. So Morin took Bias to the backyard of the Fifth Ward duplex Morin shared with his best friend, Marlon Thomas. He told Bias to look through a hole in the fence into the backyard of a vacant home next door. Bias peeked through the opening and...

The City of Houston, like most governmental entities in America, is suffering difficult financial times. The City is laying off public employees, including firefighters and police officers, and cutting back on many key services. The City Council holds annual budget hearings where the elected leaders grill department heads over their budgets. When the City’s budget director came before council, she must have expected to be grilled about the City’s budget. What happened instead must have shocked her. Facing almost $200 millions dollars in a shortfall in the City’s budget, minority city councilmen hammered the finance director over what they perceived...

Jessica Rene Tata’s 6,500-mile fugitive odyssey came to an end early Tuesday morning when the handcuffed daycare owner who fled to Nigeria after a fire killed four children under her watch was escorted into the Harris County Jail. The 22-year-old Houston woman arrived about 1:15 a.m. in a convoy of Harris County sheriff’s patrol cars and unmarked sport utility vehicles. Tata, who was wearing a body armor vest, said nothing as she was taken into the jail in the middle of a crowd of investigators with the Gulf Coast Violent Offenders and Fugitive Task Force. Christina Garza, a sheriff’s office...

A woman who fled to Nigeria after a fire at her west Houston day care killed four children last month has surrendered to authorities, her brother said Saturday. Jessica Tata faces 14 charges, including four counts of manslaughter, in connection with the Feb. 24 blaze at Jackie's Child Care. Officials have said that Tata, 22, left seven children unattended and oil cooking on the stove while she shopped at Target. She fled to Nigeria before being charged. Her brother, Ron Tata, 26, said she turned herself in around 11 a.m. Saturday. According to his relatives in Nigeria, workers at the...

Three environmental groups filed a federal lawsuit Monday accusing the Lower Colorado River Authority of violating the Clean Air Act for nearly a decade at its coal-fired power plant 90 miles west of Houston. The groups allege that the Austin-based utility has made modifications to three generators at the 1,760-megawatt Fayette Power Project but failed to install modern pollution control equipment. As a result, the power plant has released massive amounts of tiny particles, or soot, that can cause lung damage and premature death, the groups claim in the suit, which was filed at the U.S. District Court in Houston....

Surveillance stopped a pair of alleged drug smugglers from hauling about 273 kilos of marijuana over the border fence with the help of a ladder, public records reflect. A U.S. Border Patrol agent on Thursday saw 10 people coming out of the Rio Grande carrying bundles and a ladder near the Rancho Grande Subdivision in La Paloma. The agent saw the suspects use the ladder to get the bundles over the border fence, according to the complaint filed before U.S. Magistrate Judge Felix Recio in federal court. The complaint states that the agent also saw a green minivan drive in...

Outrage mounted Tuesday to the video broadcast of Houston police officers beating a teenage burglary suspect, with several activists and civil rights groups holding a town hall meeting and news conferences to demand tougher and more open disciplinary procedures aimed at curbing police brutality. A number of civil rights groups also backed a Houston congressman's call for an investigation by the U.S. Justice Department. Meanwhile, local prosecutors forcefully defended the appropriateness of misdemeanor charges filed against four police officers who took part in the youth's arrest in March. Chad Holley, who was then 15, was fleeing from a burglary on...

TEN YEARS! Today I celebrate the anniversary of my 10th year on Free Republic! It's been a hell of a ride. I've ticked off a lot of people and I've gained some life-long friends. That's curious right there. I'd like to extend my thanks to Jim Robinson and the Moderator staff for putting up with me all this time. Feel free to take a poke at me if you wish, it's a free for all.

Retired billboard painter is working to capture on canvas the face of every fallen service member from Texas — 500 and counting. Ken Pridgeon calls them his "boys." The 75-year-old artist shares his small home in Baytown with two dozen portraits he's painted of fallen Houston-area service members, each one centered on an American flag background with an eagle in the top right-hand corner. The canvases, measuring 3 feet by 4 feet, line the walls of a converted garage. A few rest near the front door, others in a den-turned- studio. This soldier was a bull rider and football player,...

The city's Office of Inspector General will open an investigation into a visit City Councilwoman Jolanda Jones made to a downtown fire station Friday in which she is alleged to have used profanity and criticized the work ethic of firefighters. Jones ardently disputed the account of the incident provided by officials with the Houston Professional Fire Fighters Association, saying she had a jovial exchange with firefighters at Station 8 that was part of a team-building exercise she organized for her staff. She said the account provided by Jeff Caynon, the fire union president, is "inaccurate" and suggested it was politically...