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When you’re barely allowed out of your home, let alone your neighbourhood, you have to mix things up whenever you can. From Chinese XO to Romanian mujdei and Filipino banana ketchup, these spicy sauces will bring the whole world into your kitchen Feeling saucy ... Crystal hot sauce, Walkerswood jerk marinade, Best Ghana shito, Lao Gan preserved black bean chilli oil and Maggi liquid seasoning. Feeling saucy ... Crystal hot sauce, Walkerswood jerk marinade, Best Ghana shito, Lao Gan preserved black bean chilli oil and Maggi liquid seasoning. Composite: Simon Leigh/The Guardian Britain is splashing out on condiments like never...

[Photo: courtesy of Kraft Heinz] _________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ As if our nation weren’t polarized enough, a new condiment is threatening to divide us even further: On Wednesday, Heinz announced potential plans to bring “mayochup” into the world. It’s half ketchup, half mayonnaise, and if you ask some people, 100% wrong. The food-processing company announced Thursday it’s contemplating selling the new product, provided it garners enough interest. It launched a public poll on Twitter, asking Americans to make the hard decision for them: “Want #mayochup in stores? 500,000 votes for yes and we’ll release it to you saucy Americans.” The reaction is mixed....

There exists in this world a condiment below all others. It has all of the flavor of sawdust and the sublime texture of soap scum. Until recently, I was unaware that The Federalist, lovers of freedom, etc., was complicit in its spread. I rise today to defend America—nay, the world—against such scurrilous anti-food propaganda. As all Americans, especially Texans, know, mayonnaise is a tool of oppression used by communists and bland-food lovers everywhere. It is a form of mind control designed to cow you into a sense of complacency about life. Food has flavor, and mayo covers that flavor...

What’s America’s favorite condiment? Hint: it’s not ketchup. The answer is mayonnaise: specifically Hellmann’s, which the nation apparently slops on everything except french fries. Hellmann’s alone accounted for $401.2 million in sales last year, according to Businessweek -- nearly a third of the total $1.3 billion mayo market here. Heinz Ketchup is a distant third with $278.6 million in sales, edged out by the $286.2 million worth of Tostito’s salsa sold last year.

Interesting page on longevity of condiments. Click on each condiment to find out how long it's safe to consume.